Some situations provoke me to the point of regressing to my EIGHT YEAR OLD LITTLE GIRL SELF… mouthing off… under my breath… to myself… about someone.
To wit, as I may or may not have mentioned before, I live in a suburb that is non-friendly. People are neutral about other people. Pleasant, but indifferent. Aware, but detached. Previously polite to a fault.
This I can live with.
But what I cannot condone is rudeness. And that is what I’m finding more often when I go outside for a walk.
For example, yesterday as I was walking along – up & down the hills – around the curves, I said “hi” or “hello” to all the people who I passed. I exhibited a modicum of good manners.
I. Was. Nice.
People with headphones nodded at me. People talking on phones waved hello. People with dogs shouted a greeting back at me. People just out for a stroll said “hi” or “hello” back to me as I walked by them.
However, people reading their smart phones as they walked along – up & down the hills – around the curves IGNORED ME.
Besides the obvious fact that it’s foolhardy to not pay attention to where you’re going when you’re walking along – up & down the hills – around the curves, it is rude to not acknowledge the person who is near you in real life.
As we all know, REJECTION HURTS.
So naturally, being the mature adult that I am, I started talking to myself about this boorish behavior. My muttering monologue went something like this…
ADULT ME [sarcastic, through clenched teeth]: Well, don’t say anything to me. Just. Being. Polite.
CHILD ME [insulted]: Hey, hey– what’s wrong with you, you poopy head?
ADULT ME [irritated]: Boy, I tell you, Ally– you try to be nice & see what you get?
CHILD ME [frantic]: Hey booger face, I’m over here. What am I? Chopped liver? Huh?!
ADULT ME [resigned, with a sigh]: Whatever. Some people aren’t even worth the bother.
CHILD ME [zinging away]: Well, well, well… if I’m chopped liver, then you’re bologna. Cut thick. Just like you, fatso!
Bottom line truth of this story? I LOVED BEING SNOTTY RIGHT BACK AT THESE PEOPLE. Granted, the conversation was only in my head, but it was lots of fun to mouth off like that. Kind of a forgotten pleasure of childhood– empowering & entertaining.