The One About Grace And Frankie & Fun Quirky Details About My Dad

/ Ally Bean

[Spoiler alert]

• • •

OVER THE WEEKEND I FINISHED WATCHING the last hilarious season of the TV show, Grace and Frankie.  One of the episodes* in this season involves Grace [played by Jane Fonda] reconciling with her younger brother [played by Jamey Sheridan] who she hasn’t seen in years.

She invites him to her house on the pretext of familial love, but the truth is she’s feeling unexpectedly nostalgic and wants him to give her the family recipe for chicken paprikash.

He knows this recipe by heart.

In the course of their conversation he figures out the subterfuge and starts to walk out, but Frankie [played by Lily Tomlin] finds a way for the two of them to get along.

He was young when their father died and he wants to know fun little details about the man.  So for every chicken paprikash ingredient he says, Grace tells him something personal about their father.

This episode was quintessential Grace and Frankie, funny and poignant.

Absurd, yet believable.

• • •

THIS EPISODE GOT ME THINKING ABOUT fun little details about my father;  he died when I was 15 so my memories of him are from a kid’s point of view.  The details I remember aren’t about his professions, or his accomplishments, or his character– just idiosyncratic things about an adult.

Thus in honor of this coming weekend’s Father’s Day in the US, and for snorts and giggles, I share a list of some fun quirky details about my dad.

Ostensibly it’s about my father, but perhaps gives a glimpse into who I am as well.  I’ve read that the oldest daughter is a female version of her father. Maybe so, maybe not.

All I know is he was character.

• • •

✅ He could wiggle his ears.

✅ His favorite holiday was St. Patrick’s Day. He wore a green necktie and green suspenders, and insisted we have corned beef & cabbage dinner– with a shot of Irish whiskey for the adults.

✅ He collected antique guns.

✅ He was a camera-shy** camera nut, with more brands and lenses and tripods and lights than you can imagine. Equipment everywhere.

✅ He kept bees and we ate honey from the hive.

✅ He had a pair of boxer shorts underwear that had a white background with red ants crawling around. When he wore the underwear he’d say he had “ants in his pants.”

✅ He was ambidextrous.

✅ He didn’t suffer fools easily, nor dawdling little girls, so if I was being pokey and said “I’m coming, I’m coming” he’d yell “SO’S CHRISTMAS.” 

• • •

Questions of the Day

If you knew him as a child, what fun and/or quirky little details do you remember about your father?

Are you like him in any ways?

If you watched it, what did you think of Season 7 of Grace and Frankie?

Did the series finale work for you?

* Season7, Episode 14 – The Paprikash

** The best photo of him I have is of him sitting by a cadaver he worked on in med school.  While interesting, it is macabre, not suitable for this PG-13 blog.

240 thoughts on “The One About Grace And Frankie & Fun Quirky Details About My Dad”

  1. If you read my blog this Friday you’ll see why my father is flummoxing me…😆…my dad and I are alike in that we are stubborn and lack patience…I liked the brother episode of Grace, but I did not like the finale…it missed the mark for me

    Liked by 5 people

  2. What a beautiful post. I feel like I know your father through those glimpses. My father was not “a character.” He was quiet and liked to remain in the background. One lasting memory: we went together to a hardware store to pick up some nails, tools and other things. He picked up a few nails from a bin – the kind where you pay by the nail, and then went around picking up the other things. When we got home he realized that he had put the few nails in his pocket as he walked around and had forgotten to pay from them. Back to the store we went, even though they were probably only worth about 5 cents at the time. A lesson in trust and honesty I’ve never forgotten.

    Liked by 5 people

  3. Ack! I had to skip right past the post. i haven’t seen the last season yet. I’ve been waiting for it to finish to get a month of netflix. Now, I’m sticking my fingers in my ears and covering my eyes… I hope it was a fun season!

    Liked by 4 people

      • Okay, I trusted you. Fun list about your father. You wrote, ” I’ve read that the oldest daughter is a female version of her father. ” To that I say, damn, I hope not. I don’t have a lot of fun things to say about my father. He did have his good and bad points but I don’t want to be like him. Your dad sounds more fun.

        Liked by 2 people

  4. My father was also a character, kind of loud, very opinionated, and he had a heart of gold. He had all these quirky sayings for just about every situation, and he trotted them out frequently. My favorite: “Never get in a pissing match with a skunk, no way to win.” I think of that phrase often…

    Liked by 4 people

  5. I love this. I will have to think about what little quirks dad had. You’d think I’d have several memories, given I was lucky to be in my 40s when he died. I wonder if they’re different than the memories my siblings have.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Dawn, my observation has been that siblings have some of the same memories, but often interpret them differently. I was [am?] an only child so all I have are my memories and impressions.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I stopped watching Grace and Frankie a few seasons ago. It just started getting too absurd for me. Before then, I really liked the show quite a bit.

    My dad had a lot of quirks, but they weren’t necessarily funny ones. He didn’t eat at the table with the whole family. He always did all the grocery shopping when I was a kid. He didn’t go to church, but he read lots of theology and philosophy. He always got me flowers and/or candy for Valentine’s Day.

    I’m like him in many ways, and not all of them good. I work on the negatives constantly, but I am grateful that he gave me a love of Nature, an empathy for those less fortunate, and a truly unprejudiced and democratic worldview.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Nance, yes the show got more absurd as it went along, but I liked it so I followed through and watched all [most] of it.

      I like your father’s quirks, things that maybe influenced you– but I trust you eat at the table with your family. That is truly idiosyncratic behavior.

      I see bits of my father in me, but not too much. You raise an excellent point that some characteristics a parent passes onto you are not necessarily good things, and you have to consciously remind yourself to let them go.

      Like

  7. What a lovely post!
    I loved Grace and Frankie and yeah, they mighta coulda done a better job on the last episode…
    And now that you mention it, as the eldest of three sisters, I think I AM quite a bit like him in many ways – which is funny because my youngest sister and he share(d) the same birthday – September 11.
    Hmmm…Now you’ve got me wanting to write a post of this genre – even though I was 49 when he died. I am going to go digging for some memories!

    Liked by 4 people

    • Dale, I couldn’t quite get into the series finale. It didn’t ring true about these two strong women and how they faced adversity. Not to mention Grace would never spill a martini!

      Funny how some oldest daughters immediately know they’re like their fathers. I see some of mine in me, but I knew him so long ago and as a kid, so I might not know what I’m talking about. I look forward to your memories if you choose to share them on your blog.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Yeah. I’m going to rewatch it – I think I was half-assed paying attention. And no, There is no way in hell Grace would spill a martini!!

        I have been lacking inspiration to write on my blog – I think I got too much into the challenges and forgot why I started in the first place – so this is an ideal subject. I thank you and yes, it will be shared on the blog!

        Liked by 2 people

        • Thank you. I started to snarl when Grace spilled the martini, felt this wasn’t going to be the best series finale ever.

          You raise a good point about doing challenges. Over the years I’ve done a few but it’s easy to lose yourself in them, instead of just writing whatever is going on as it happens. I do best when I’m a free spirit.

          Liked by 1 person

          • I swear, sometimes when they end a series, they rush the ending. Why?

            They are a double-edged sword. They would push my creativity to write, but the reciprocation aspect is oh so tirirng! I started writing on another blog just to let myself go in a different direction. It has awakened me to let go and be free.

            Liked by 2 people

  8. Like nance, I stopped watching G&F after the first or second season. Maybe I’ll take a quick peak at the tail end of Season 7.

    My dad had lots of interests outside of his work as an electrical engineer and department head at Bell Labs ~ camping, gardening, photography, woodworking, sailing, hiking, canoeing, international travel, etc. He also enjoyed Happy Hour every day after work. 😀

    Liked by 4 people

    • Nancy, I know Grace and Frankie got wacko, but I enjoyed their relationship so much, plus the guest stars, that I had to keep watching. It’ll be interesting to see what you think of the ending without having watched the middle.

      Your dad sounds cool. I imagine his interests in a variety of things helped shape you. Maybe even his love of Happy Hours? Just saying, no disrespect intended

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      • Haha! No offense taken.

        BTW: I attempt to enjoy HAPPY hours throughout the day . . . but today I’m going in for an emergency root canal so my “happy” may be impacted and not in a good way. On the plus side, I’m glad they were able to fit me in.

        Liked by 1 person

        • OUCH! I’m sorry to read about your root canal, but glad you are able to get an appointment quickly so you won’t be in pain for a long time. What a thing to happen!

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          • Home again . . . and HAPPY to be here. 😀

            My face still needs to deflate. It’s swollen up like a lop-sided balloon.

            Oh, did I mention? Tomorrow is our anniversary. Let’s see ~> Crooked smile. Can’t chew on that side. Antibiotics upsetting my stomach. Pain pills upsetting my stomach. It’ll be an anniversary to remember for all the wrong reasons!

            Liked by 2 people

            • I’m happy that you’re back home. What a relief to get the procedure over. Your anniversary will be memorable, if nothing else. Perhaps you could celebrate one week from now?

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              • That’s probably what we’ll do if the swelling hasn’t subsided and other issues haven’t resolved themselves by tomorrow.

                The good news ~> I’m seeing the humor in the situation.

                Signed,
                The Lop-sided Chipmunk

                Liked by 2 people

  9. I remember my dad as being quiet and so kind and giving to everyone. Losing him at 19 was probably the hardest thing I’ve gone through. He supported me in every way. And he was so patient with our disabled brother. He taught Mark quite a lot. Like how to build a bird house and how to fish and just how to be helpful. Sure do miss him every day!
    I didn’t know your dad well. I love the list of his antics. So funny! Can’t imagine the picture of him with a cadaver!😁

    Liked by 4 people

    • Beth, I remember your dad– and what happened that winter. It was a shock to be sure. So sad. You’re right he did good by Mark, as can still be seen to this day.

      My father was complex and older, as you know. I’d post a photo of him if I could find a good one, OTHER than the cadaver one. 🙄

      Liked by 1 person

  10. So weird. I just saw that episode last night. I also finished the season this week. My dad died when I was 10 so my details are not only from a child’s point of view but from a beloved child’s point of view. As my brothers were much older, my dad was ecstatic to have a daughter. He made me fried eggs at 9 p.m. if I wanted one. He’d run out for potato chips if I wanted some. He made my mother crazy by being at my beck and call. He was the kindest man I knew. At that time, dads didn’t spend much time with daughters so all I remember of my friends’ dads was that they were gruff and wanted us to stay out of their way. He wasn’t at all like that. Still miss him.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Frank, I only talked about one scene in one episode of Grace and Frankie so I felt okay doing so. Plus that scene got me thinking, reminiscing, about times long ago. Kind of fun

      Liked by 1 person

  13. I haven’t watched a single episode of Grace and Frankie. Freakishly, the entertainment fellow on the news JUST had a blurb about them and seconds later I started reading your post. It sounds like a funny show.

    This is a very sweet post, well timed with Father’s Day approaching. I love “SO’S CHRISTMAS.” I’m blessed to still have my father. He’s 82. He has softened A LOT with age, which has been a welcome change to the mostly grumpy dad I grew up with. As a kid I knew my dad to be obsessed with the budget. He bought a book called Energy Ant and read it to his 5 kids. Then he asked us to all be Energy Ants and go around the house turning off lights, etc. He loves Irish music, and really all things Irish.

    One of my favorite memories of him was when we were visiting my sister at Notre Dame for Mom’s weekend. The visit only required my Mom’s presence, but we stopped there on our way back from a spring break trip with my younger brothers and I. He took me to the student center and urged me to pick out a hair style that seemed popular with students, a hair style that I might like. I was in high school and was hell bent on growing my hair long (or at least longer than my overgrown Dorothy Hamel hairdo), which ticked my mom off. My hair was struggling – no product, no direction, no support from my Mom, lover of VERY short hair for girls. Then he took me to a salon in South Bend that he picked out of the phone book and walked me in for a haircut and hair care tips. This was a rare occasion when he showed that he could be tuned in to my needs. My hair improved as did my self esteem. 😉

    Thanks for reminding me of this.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Ernie, I enjoyed most episodes of Grace and Frankie, but a few didn’t grab me. Overall it was funny, especially the episodes with their adult children who had problems of their own.

      Energy Ant sounds like a memorable book from your childhood. I’m laughing about its message. Your story of your haircut is wonderful. What a great guy to help you feel better about yourself in a way that a girl could appreciate. I can understand how the right haircut boosted your self esteem. My mother was all about short hair too. She pushed me to keep my hair short, short, short a la Dorothy Hamill. Having long hair now seems like teenage rebellion to me.

      Like

  14. I did watch the episode and I found it endearing. I had my dad into my adult life, but losing him was still so devastating. My dad could also wiggle his ears. My daughter was so enthralled by that, she worked hard until she could also wiggle her ears – I still can’t. As a child, I recognized early on how childlike he was and I responded well to that. I took naps with him – resistant as I was – and when I thought he was asleep, I would try to sneak out of bed and he would whimper like a baby so I would lay back down. I miss the deep timbre of his rich bass voice. Thank you for writing this post and giving me a minute to remember such lovely times.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Maggie, sometimes Grace and Frankie really hits the mark. It’s funny how seeing the episode with her brother prompted me to get thinking about my father who has been gone for decades.

      I like your memories of your father. I didn’t inherit the ability to wiggle my ears either, but so be it. Intriguing that you realized your dad was childlike, even when you were a child, too. I love the story about napping and his ploy to get you back where you belonged. It’s the fun memories of parents that make them seem like real people, which they were of course, but you can forget that as you get older. Thanks for sharing here.

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I don’t feel like I knew my father particularly well (my family of origin is quite unusual). He was well into his 40s when I was born, and I really didn’t spend all that much time with him. As I recall, though, he was a big sucker for Christmas with all the trimmings.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Lynette, I know many people don’t have much in the way of memories about a parent. It is interesting how you remember your father’s love of Christmas, which seems like a good thing. Whatever he was like, at least you have one positive memory of him.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. I’ve never seen the show so no input on that. My dad just died less than a month ago at 93 so I had lots of years for memories, although I was away from home most of the time for high school on. Like my dad, I love to travel and love horses and riding. I really enjoyed reading about your dad. I love the ants in his pants bit. ❤️

    Liked by 3 people

    • Janet, I’m sorry your father died recently. Obviously you’ve had the pleasure of knowing your father well into your adulthood. I’d suspect that your memories are deeper than mine– and more varied. That’s wonderful and I’m sure you appreciate them all. We take what we need from relationships, it would seem to me.

      Like

  17. Hi Ally, I loved watching Grace and Frankie. They touched upon challenging subjects with intelligence and humour. Like you say well, often “funny and poignant.” First time I have read how “oldest daughter is a female version of her father.” Same, with me…which explains some of my quirks. Ha, ha, ‘ants in his pants.’ A bit of a shudder about the ‘cadaver.’ Thank you for reminding me about the important, memorable moments in a family.💕

    Liked by 3 people

    • Erica/Erika, I agree that Grace and Frankie discussed many senior issues that heretofore no one had touched on in a TV comedy. And they did it with style and smarts. I’ve read that the first daughter is like her father in a few places, but don’t know if it is actually fact– or just an unsubstantiated idea that’s getting traction lately. I didn’t include the photo with the cadaver because like you said, *shudder.*

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Ally,
    What wonderful memories! My dad will be 87 in July. We are 30 years apart. He changed after Mom died. That was 5 1/2 years ago. I love him, but I can’t be around him for very long because he’s become a little too intense. I will be seeing him on Sunday! I hope I ‘m not too much like him and that I don’t turn into him. Ha! When I was young. I remember him always being the life of the party! I haven’t seen Grace and Frankie, but now I think I’m going to have to check it out! Mona

    Liked by 3 people

    • Mona, as some people age they do seem to become more intense. I can understand why you don’t want to be around your father for extended periods of time. I hope your visit with him on Sunday goes smoothly. I figure if you intentionally decide you don’t want to be like a parent then you’re more than halfway there to making it so. Grace and Frankie made me laugh and think and cry over the years. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but the writing is top-notch and shows that older women are real people, not just props in a plot line.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. I loved reading about the memories of your dad, so sweet. My Dad was a mix of being hard on us and being very affectionate and funny, and I think I parent just like him. If we would get a 98 on a test, he’d say “What happened to the other 2 points?” which I do NOT do to my kids, and he expected hard work from us all, which I definitely expect from my kids. Laziness just did not fly in our home. He always gave us hugs and would praise us in front of others and loved to dance and sing. We were lucky 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Colleen, your father sounds like a good mix of characteristics that helped shape who you are today. It’s interesting to think back on parents and what they stressed to you as a child, what you’ve retained. Fun that he liked to dance and sing and hug. That’s great.

      Like

  20. I loved reading about your dad and I love thinking about the influence my dad had on me. My father was a shy recluse, and I am his shy recluse daughter. He loved to dance, and I love to dance. He was neurotic about having dinner on time, and I am neurotic about having dinner on time. I always say, “I am my father’s daughter.” Thank you for sharing your memories of your dad and asking about our memories.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Robin, you know yourself well to realize all the similarities between you and your father. It’s cool to remember a parent then see the good stuff in yourself. I don’t think I’ve ever said “I’m my father’s daughter” but it makes me wonder how much I am.

      Like

  21. Thanks for sharing these lovely and fun details about your dad. I’m the oldest daughter – also the only daughter – and I really am a female version of my dad as well.

    My mom uses that “so’s Christmas” line as well.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Nicole, it’s amazing how many oldest daughters are like their fathers. I mean, the idea may be hearsay without any factual basis, but it rings true nonetheless.

      Funny that your mother said “So’s Christmas.” You are from Scottish ancestry, yes? So am I. A connection to that culture?

      Like

  23. OH Ally reading the quirks about your Dad warmed my heart. Was fun to read and the “ants in my pants” cracks me up. Its great to have memories like that! I am so sorry that you lost him at such a young age.
    My Dad always would drum on the steering wheel when driving and listening to music. My husband does it as well. LOL!
    I remember my Dad dancing a jig around the kitchen singing “If I was a Rich Man”, from Fiddler on the Roof.
    He loved going out to eat when we were little and on road trips. We very rarely ate out when at home. We kids would always giggle as my Dad would pull into a restaurant with my Mom saying, “I packed sandwiches for us, or I have soup I can fix when we get to the campsite.

    Liked by 3 people

    • joyroses13, the “ants in your pants” deal was timeless Dad Humor. No doubt there’s some guy who is doing that schtick today!

      I like your memories of your father. Drumming on a steer wheel, or dancing a jig, are fun. I can imagine being a giggling kid when you went out to eat on vacations while your mother tried to stop it. How cute!

      Like

  24. I have to finish that final season of G and F. Thanks for reminding me.
    My children called my Dad “the smartest man in the world”. And pre-internet, if they got stuck on homework, we would call him for help. He got Alzheimers so during his last years he got quieter and quieter but he was always calm and peaceful.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Ellen D., that’s a really good memory of your father, courtesy of your kids. I like it. It’s good that when your father got Alzheimer’s he remained quiet, not all patients turn inward.

      Like

  25. Yes, I am my father’s daughter! My father had a dry sarcastic sense of humor and was devoted to words and their proper usage- ask for a cold glass of water and you would be waiting for a while as your glass was chilling, or you could have asked for a glass of cold water and then you would have something to drink. And on and on that way. The dinner table was always littered with dictionaries and encyclopedias.

    I stopped watching “Grace and Frankie” several seasons ago – when the two main characters turned into stupid, incompetent airheads. I have no patience for stupidity.

    (On a very self-centered note – when I saw the title of this post in my blogroll I reacted very personally to “The one about Grace & Frankie…” I thought “What in heavens could you have to say about me and my cat”)

    Liked by 3 people

    • Grace, I had an uncle who’d pull that kind of word play game with people, waitresses in particular. He was all about being precise and forcing everyone to acknowledge when they weren’t doing that.

      I rather liked Grace and Frankie’s dippy behaviors, it made them seem real to me. I grant you the plots were absurd, but it was the over the top vibe of the characters that charmed me and made me contemplate who I’ll be when I’m in my 80s. Plus their adult kids, loved them. But, of course, no one is required to watch any TV show!

      I’m laughing about your connection to the title of this post.

      Liked by 1 person

  26. It’s great how telling details can give you such a picture of a person. From the snippets you shared, your Dad sounds like a fun, smart, interesting man with just a bit of an edge to him. (My favorite people all have a bit of an edge to them.) My own dad is…complicated. I’m glad I’ve gotten many years with him so that we could both grow and change and our relationship could evolve past what it was when I was growing up. One thing I will always treasure about him: He could have been a poster child for Silent Generation work ethic; never called in sick, never slacked, took pride in working hard. We were NEVER allowed to call him at work. (I remember only one time that my mother did, and it was an emergency.) But, when I was running track in junior high, he took time off to attend each of my afternoon meets. I was not a track star, and only ran two events. I was having trouble with my legs, which needed taping (or so we thought), and he wanted to be the one to get me taped up. He never missed a meet, and I knew that meant something. A lot.

    As for G&F, I loved the first few seasons. I didn’t finish the last one; it got too…something…for me. Maybe I’ll give it another go. All of my real favorites are over and there’s a gaping hole in my TV queue.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Rita, my father was complicated, too– with quite a bit of edge to him. I spun it happy here. I like your memories of your father. I know that the Silent Generation never wore their hearts on their sleeves.

      It’s wonderful how he helped you when it came to track in junior high, that’s something that would mean a lot to a girl at that age. That kind of unwavering support is crucial.

      I liked some seasons of Grace and Frankie better than other ones. The first couple were a hoot, then it got less interesting, but this last season seemed like the writers got the verve back– until the series finale episode that I didn’t care for.

      Like

  27. My dad passed in October 2018 and I still haven’t had the gumption to write about him. As his oldest and a daughter, I was definitely like him. Tenacious perfectionists. He and I have both been loyal friends to those we’ve known since childhood. A funny thing about my dad? Well, he could fix anything, but once I asked him to look at our basement freezer after it stopped working due to one of many basement floods. He came over, looked it over, gave it a swift kick, and it started running again! Lol! Lasted us two more years till the next flood.

    I’m sorry you lost your dad at such a young age.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Bijoux, I like how you know in what ways you’re like your father. It lends credence to the idea that the oldest daughter is like her father. Seems to be ringing true with many commenters here. I’m sure I’m like mine is some ways, but not sure if that’s a child me saying that or adult me. 🤔

      How funny that your dad kicked the freezer and it kept working for two more years. Now that is a gifted man who can cajole a machine into working with a swift kick. Gotta love it!

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  28. I don’t watch the show so I don’t have any opinion at all. 🙂 I think I would like it but never got around to starting it and once a series has so many seasons I’m often intimidated by that. He does sound like a character! It’s sad that he died young although I remember you telling me that he was an older parent. I lost my dad in 2021 so I knew him a long time and we were much alike in our senses of humor and love for books. Dad was rock steady and always there for his loved ones. He was quiet yet hilarious in a sarcastic way. He had many sayings from his small town that made no sense to anyone who wasn’t from there. (but which I learned growing up) I miss his wisdom and kindness.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Margaret, I know what you mean about not starting a TV show after there’ve been so many seasons of it. I find that intimidating, too. In some ways Grace and Frankie is easy to follow, jumping through the episodes, because each episode is goofy in its own right.

      Yes, my father was older and in not too good health for much of my childhood. He could be quite funny so I focused on that here. Your dad always sounded like a great guy, who had it going on for his family. I’m sure his wisdom and kindness lives on within you.

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  30. Oh, Ally, I love these quirky facts about your dad. They paint a picture of a man who was worth paying attention to and a girl who was observant about the details. If you are a female version of your dad, I can see where the humor and delight come from!

    Of all the things that I miss most about my dad is the way he’d put his arm around my shoulder and say, “It’s going to be great, Kid!” Here’s to a Happy Father’s Day for our dads!

    Liked by 3 people

    • Wynne, you’re right. I was an observant little girl, encouraged by a father who was hyper-observant. It’s a good skill to know how to pay attention– and how to find the humor in things.

      What a sweet memory of your father. I’d miss that kind of support, too. Yet as long as you remember it I’d say you’re still getting his support. Getting a little New Age-y here, I suppose.

      Liked by 1 person

      • You are so right – if we remember it, we are still receiving it. It feels as if the longer he is gone, the more I find him in me as if I’ve had to embody the things I could always go to him for. And so he really does live on. And yes, a great skill to know how to pay attention and to find humor!

        Love this post, Ally!

        Liked by 2 people

    • Catsandcoffee, that’s fascinating. He was at Pearl Harbor! I can see why he talked about it– and why you remember him talking about it. Yep, Dad Jokes are timeless. Every generation of dads seem to have them. 🙄

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  32. What a great post! I remember so many quirky things…he’d always manage to fall out of a boat or canoe (on purpose? Who knew?), he lived to beat us at hearts, he was the king of bad jokes ( kind of like the ants in the pants, my dad would soo do that!). But mostly he had class. He taught us how to make the best of a chronic condition (parkinsons) and live the life we have. I wish i was like him but I’m not there yet.

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    • Martha, your dad sounds like a good guy. Difficult to know about falling out of the boat, slapstick perhaps? The bad joke thing seems to come with Dad Territory. I imagine you learned more from his example in the face of Parkinson’s than you may realize. You might be like him and not even aware of it.

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  33. Ants in his pants! My dad wore boxers, us girls had to iron them. He would sit on the breezeway with his cigarette, a drink and the US atlas. My mom and 3 sisters would always say, Clyde is planning a trip! I got wanderlust in my blood from day one. I Iost him when I was 20.😘 How does one wiggle their ears. That had to be so fun!

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  35. I’ve loved Grace and Frankie but after reading some of the comments, I’m sad about the ending (I haven’t seen this season yet). You did say spoiler alert so it’s my own fault. My dad definitely was a character and really enjoyed life. He was a florist by trade but also a craftsman and had a work shed in the backyard (sound familiar?) He had a heart attack at a fairly young age and had to take early retirement so lots of hours were spent in that shed and in the garage making things. I still have some of his finished products and a series of pictures from when he recovered the dining room chairs. He had a group of close friends and they would go on train and bus trips to Reno at least once a year. He was usually the hit of the group, even wearing a dress once because my mom wanted to wear pants and he said, “If you’re wearing pants, I’m wearing a dress.” He was old-fashioned that way. When he went into the mens room some guy was in there and started to cover himself because he thought dad was a woman – LOL. He’s been gone for 40 years and sadly never met my husband or kids. I miss him a lot but can imagine him with my mom again and believe they are having a great time up there!

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    • Janet, I liked the last season of Grace and Frankie but you’ll have to watch it all to see what you think of the season including that last episode.

      It sounds like your father made the best of life, which is wonderful. Is it any wonder you make things in a shed out back of your house? And that you like to go to Reno? As for him wearing a dress, that’s slapstick humor at its best. What a hoot!

      I like your last sentence. So sweet to think of them like this. Comforting actually.

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  36. I’m grateful for this, Ally, because it’s a struggle in our home to watch any comedy. My wife has an extremely low tolerance for them. However, we are both of Hungarian ancestry, and she loves to cook Paprikash (and goulash, etc.). So this episode just might be my entree into our watching the entire series. Fingers crossed. I loved the boxers reference — there was (still is?) something about fathers walking around in their boxers that always amused me. – Marty

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    • Marty, Grace and Frankie is a goofball show that I enjoyed because it was slightly absurd, slightly believable– and very well written and acted. I wonder how your wife will take to it, not everyone likes it. I agree that there is something intrinsically funny about boxer shorts. Don’t know why, but they are amusing.

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  37. I had to pass up your Grace & Frankie section because I’m not done with Season 7 yet. I usually watch it with a girlfriend and we will not be done with the season until sometime in July. That being said, I can’t imagine I will not enjoy the final episodes because G&F is always LOL funny!

    I remember my dad for his sense of humor – from his quick-witted, dry retorts, to the sombrero hat and pink shorts he wore with a smirk and a wink, to the photo I have of him with kleenex stuck up his nose. He was serious about his responsibilities as a husband, dad and sole provider, but he also knew the value of not taking life too seriously. He’s been gone ten years, but some days I sorely miss funny dad.

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    • Mary, I like Grace and Frankie for the reason you mention, I laughed out loud often while watching it.

      Oh I like anyone with a dry sense of humor and your dad sounds like that kind of person. Anyone who wears a sombrero and pink shorts is a person who knows how to lighten up in life. He achieved balance in his life– and that’s inspiring for all of us.

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    • AutumnAshbough, I’m sorry for your loss but would guess that your memories of her are appreciated. As an adult while writing this post, I found it odd to think back to my childhood impressions of my father. I’d guess it might be the same for you thinking back on your mother.

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  41. Those quirky fun details about your dad add up to a pretty cool guy. Can you wiggle your ears? I imagine you are camera shy, and you don’t suffer fools easily. I saw the first episode of Frankie and Grace and really enjoyed it, but my husband was like “meh” so that was it. We tend to watch TV together so we’re always looking for stuff that we will both like. Although sometimes he surprises me. For instance, we’re now into Season 2 of Buffy, the Vampire Slayer. Go figure.

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    • Marie, I cannot wiggle my ears. I’ve been able to live a good life in spite of it. I watch some TV shows with Zen-Den then other shows on my own. Grace and Frankie is one I watched alone. Your husband likes Buffy! It’s a good show but I’ll admit I’ve never seen it straight through. Just episodes here and there.

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  42. Dad had a skin tag on the top of his head, and his hair didn’t cover it. I asked him what it was, and he said he was growing a new head, and when it got to full size the old head would fall off.

    I was always told (by Mom, naturally) that boys part their hair on the left and girls on the right, but Dad parted his on the right. (It turned out that a lot of men parted it on the right, and a lot of women on the left; I learned later that you part it where it wants to be parted.) He probably had the same problem I had, a cowlick that probably would have ceased to be a problem had I been taught to part it on the right.

    One day, I asked him how to tie a tie, so he got a couple of his old ties and showed the three of us how to tie a four-in-hand knot. I discovered the Windsor knot by accident.

    Grandma had a picture of him from the May crowning one year, and he was wearing knickerbockers. I looked a lot like him, except his nose, of which his was quite prominent. He used to say “Thank God none of you got my nose!” He had to wear a fedora for work, and the first time he saw himself he said “I look like Myron on his way to synagogue on Friday afternoon.” (This was in a much less politically correct and sensitive time.)

    I’ve never seen the show, by the way…

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    • John, your dad was growing a new head and you believed him? I didn’t know there were rules about where to part your hair. I figured it parted where it was meant to be and you went with that.

      That’s one fancy way to tie your necktie. Kind of a classy way of choking yourself with a tie. Happy to know you have the best nose for your face. I could tell some less politically correct things about my father, too. ‘Twas a different world.

      Grace and Frankie has been delightful because it’s shown the world that older women are a force to be reckoned with!

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      • Come on, you know I knew he was joking about the new head thing. (At least, I think I knew…)

        Dad didn’t even know the Windsor knot; I learned it after he died. A friend showed me how to tie it. I think it looks sharp, provided you’re not tying one of those extra-wide ’70’s ties.

        As for his nose, if I had gotten it, I’d’ve worn it with pride. Grandma Holton had the same one.

        Liked by 3 people

    • Laura, as a girl those underpants made me giggle which got him laughing, so win-win. Hurray for silly! If you decide to watch Grace and Frankie I’ll be interested in your take of it.

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  44. I loved Grace and Frankie. The last season wasn’t my favorite, but I did enjoy it and that episode in particular.

    This is a wonderful post. Your memories of your dad made me smile – the St. Patrick’s Day and S’OS Christmas ones the most.

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    • Katie, I know not everyone liked the show, for various reasons, but I found the writing sharp and the acting spot on. I didn’t like all season the same, but so be it.

      For me the memories associated with holidays are the most ingrained in me. Like I said this is a kid’s view of an adult who happened to be my father. Perhaps not what an adult would remember but a kid… you betcha.

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  45. Oh, I really liked Grace and Frankie. My dad liked it, too, though he died in 2017, so missed most of it. One fact about my dad was that he hated TV. My step-mom liked to watch sometimes, and so he watched G&F for her. So for him to like it is high praise.

    Your father sounds like a character, to be sure. I didn’t meet my Dad until I was 21, so no childhood memories. I like the idea of your post, though. Perhaps I’ll use it and it will get me to post something for a change, it’s been ages since I’ve done that or even looked around at other folks’ blogs (sorry)

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    • J, your father’s assessment of Grace and Frankie is high praise. I liked the show overall, a few seasons less so, but it was good. Nice to see older women as the lead in a TV show.

      If this prompts you to write and blog again then that’s great. I remember you talking about when you met your father. It was fascinating and heartwarming. The lives we live, eh?

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  46. I enjoyed watching Grace & Frankie…but now, I barely remember the final episode; so I may have to re-watch that one.

    My parents divorced when I was around 10 or so (and then we were out of touch for years, sadly -long story. Suffice it to say, his wife at the time and the fact that we were teenagers) so I don’t remember much.

    I do know he had a temper as evidenced with the arguments with mom toward the end of the marriage AND by the story an uncle shared at his funeral. He was attempting to fix a car and, eventually, got so frustrated he went and got some gas with the intent of blowing up the car. The uncles restrained him, luckily.

    But funny enough, with us children he never got angry with us when we acted up. Usually, he would say you sit right there and you sit over there (as he was doing whatever it was he was doing – he was always doing something) until I get tired. I suspect he meant when he got tired of us asking him if he was tired yet.

    I regret those lost years – and I know he did too. Unfortunately, we moved away from Texas not too long after we re-connected. I made a point to see him every time I went home…and he was still patient and always doing something.

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    • Gigi, your father sounds flawed but interesting. I like his approach to dealing with you when you acted up. Better than something physical. It’s fascinating how he was always doing something. Some people are like that, always busy. At least you had some contact later in life, albeit less than you wanted but still a connection after your teenage years. That seems like something good.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Mom & Dad were like oil and water. Mom once told me (many years later) that she had always loved Dad; but they couldn’t live together.
      I give my dad a lot of credit for us coming back together. Somewhere, he must have heard that I had a baby. How he found us back in those pre-internet days, I’ll never know (probably mom) and he just showed up on the doorstep one day, ready with bear hug and eager to meet his grandson. I think that took a lot of courage as he didn’t know how I would receive him after all those years apart.. *dammit* Now I have something in my eye!

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      • This is such a sweet story. I’m glad your father took the risk of getting in touch with you again. Good question about how he knew where you were, but what a joy to know he cared that much. Thanks for sharing it here, I’m touched.

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  47. I’ve never seen the show, but what a great pairing with Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin!

    My father taught me to draw and encouraged my love of science fiction. We used to watch Doctor Who together when I was a preteen/teen. But things weren’t all rosy. When my parents split up, we didn’t really speak much. They eventually reconciled, but it took many years for us to finally get along.

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    • L. Marie, the casting in the show is superb. Everyone is accomplished and brings the characters to life.

      Your father did you well if he taught you to draw and to appreciate Dr. Who. Not bad memories, even if there was a parental split. I know that getting along with parents as an adult is a different game than getting along with them as a child. We adapt.

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  48. Holy cow, you have a lot of comments on this post! I was lucky to have my dad until he was 92. I think I’m more like him than I am like my mother (and, being the only daughter, I guess that makes me the oldest daughter too?), but both were wonderful people so I’d be happy either way.

    I saw that last episode and thought it wasn’t quite up to G&F standards. Kind of reminded me of “it was all a dream” endings. But, speaking of streaming series, have you seen Ted Lasso? It makes me so happy, I never want it to end.

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    • Janis, I know! Apparently talking about fathers is a popular topic. I enjoy comments so all is good.

      I like your balanced acceptance of being a mix of your parents. I feel the same way, some of each is bouncing around inside me.

      I agree that the last episode of Grace and Frankie didn’t cut it. Good reference to “dream” endings, it was kind of like that. Weak. I wanted the duo to go out riding high, full of spit and vinegar, not moseying down a beach like two old has-beens.

      We don’t get Apple TV so I haven’t seen Ted Lasso. I know many people who love it and I’m sure I would too. Maybe after Z-D retires we’ll rethink of streaming needs and add Apple TV to the mix.

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  49. What a lovely reflection on memories of your father. I’m posting a few of my own tomorrow about my Dad.
    The “ants in my pants” boxers + his comment about Christmas coming made me laugh.
    My father and I have some huge overlaps in personality (the whole premise of my post tomorrow!), but then in some other areas, we are polar opposites.
    Quirks about my Dad?
    – This is going to sound bizarre, but he has a horse grooming brush (it’s all plastic bristles) that he uses to massage his head. He LOVES it.
    – He LOVES candy. Gummy bears, jelly beans. They are his thing.
    – He hates to be late to anything and leaves excessively early for everything.
    – He refuses to use a Kleenex EVER and only uses handkerchiefs. As in I have never, in my life, seen him use a Kleenex. He has a whole drawer full of handkerchiefs.
    I love my Dad so much. He’s hilarious and frustrating and wonderful. I’m also truly grateful my kids have had the opportunity to spend so much quality time with him; both my grandfather’s died long before I was born and I always wished I had been able to meet them.

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    • Elisabeth, I adore your memories of your father. Thanks for sharing them here. It’s those little details that make an adult seem more human to a kid– and when you become an adult those same little details take on a different vibe. Writing this I realized how quirky my father was, while acknowledging he was a complicated man to like from my adult point of view. I agree it’s wonderful that your kids have had the opportunity to know their grandfather. I knew one of mine, he was serious and smoked a cigar. Such are my memories of him.

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  50. I don’t know the series but I do know your father sounds quite entertaining, especially with the Dad jokes! Lucky you to get fresh honey from the hive. Corned meat and cabbage isn’t bad either! I guess we all want to know about our parents. Even if they don’t pass away early, we don’t always ask the questions that reveal who they truly are and why they might be as they are.

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  51. Since I got rid of my televisions in 2011, I’m not a cool enough kid to leave a comment about Grace and Frankie; I’ve never heard of them. On the other hand, I could fill several pages with my dad’s characterisitics. I sometimes say that as I’ve aged I’ve become less like my mother and more like my dad, and that’s all to the good. Mom was great, but she lacked Dad’s curiosity, willingness to take on new challenges, and love of word play. One of my earliest memories is of ‘reading’ the newspaper with Dad every night, long before I hit kindergarten at age four. And nearly every Saturday we’d tell Mom we were taking limbs or some such to the dump, and then we’d go ‘exploring.’ Once we were out of sight of the house, Dad would ask, “Which direction?” and off we’d go.

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    • Linda, your dad sounds wonderful and adventurous. Interesting how you know you’ve aged into being more like him than your mother. I can see his influence in your quest for plants, knowledge of said, photos of said. I like you ‘reading’ the paper with your dad, that’s a great way to get a child interested in the world around them beyond what they can see.

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  52. I love Grace & Frankie! (But I’m wondering if I saw Season 7, will have to check.) So sorry you lost your dad at such an early age but it was fun reading your memories of him, especially his sense of humor. My father liked to teach us things, giving us scientific explanations for everything and anything we were curious about. He was also mischievous, especially at supper when he’d act up at the table while my mother was trying to teach us manners. We’d be laughing so hard…

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    • Barbara, your dad sounds wonderful. My father was all about science, too. I could write a whole post on his experiments, some of which were spectacular failures, other brilliant learning experiences. I love the idea of a father being anti-manners just to jokingly annoy your mother, make you kids laugh.

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  53. I haven’t watched the last season, but I will, and I know I’ll enjoy it. 🙂 My grandfather and my uncle were my father figures. My grandfather was one of the hardest working people I’ve ever know, and my uncle was one of the most fun. I hope you have a good Father’s Day remembering a father well loved.

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    • Judy, I doled out watching the last season of Grace and Frankie, making it last for a few weeks. You had good male role models in your grandfather and your uncle. Happy Father’s Day to you, too.

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  54. Your dad was indeed a character. Glad you’ve got such great memories. The only thing I have in common with him is I’m somewhat ambidextrous.

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  56. I don’t typically watch much TV. Lately, I have been going through this funny phase where I’ve decided to finally check out these old TV series on Netflix I’ve heard about for years from friends. As soon as I watch an episode, I can see why they were so popular. It is pretty comical that I finally get around to watching a series after ten years or more. I mention this because I’ve never seen one episode of Grace and Frankie, though, from your description, I bet I’d love it.

    I love your Dad’s line about Christmas. 🤣 I imagine that most children (particularly teens) go through a phase where they think their parents are idiots, only to have a greater appreciation for them as they become parents themselves. Happy Father’s Day to all the dads who do annoying dad things but never fail to show their kids how much they love them.

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    • Pete, some TV shows are timeless and it sounds like you’ve found some. I cannot binge watch a series but I do watch them one episode a day which is what I did with Grace and Frankie. No need to rush anything when it comes to TV.

      The “So’s Christmas” line is ingrained in me to the degree that I say it to myself when I say “I’m coming, I’m coming.” Perhaps not the lesson he intended on me learning, but there you have it. I agree that thinking back on parents when you’re an adult is an entirely different exercise than what you think of them when you’re a child.

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    • Linda Lou, that hobby sounds like fun. Model railroads fascinate me. Grace and Frankie can be very funny, but also extremely absurd. I like that, of course.

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  58. I liked that show, but only saw the first two episodes. As for my dad’s quirks: he had some odd ideas about meals. My mom got home from work late while my dad was in school, so he often cooked dinner. He was more than willing to dye the mashed potatoes green, red, or blue (on request) and he was known for serving chocolate ice cream sodas for Sunday night dinner. Beat the heck out of the other regular Sunday night meal: Chef-Boy-R-Dee pizzas, from the box. The only cheese on them was parmesean!

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  59. I grew up eating chicken paprikas (and spelling it that way because I’m Hungarian). I don’t watch “Grace and Frankie,” but Tara’s a big fan. I’ll have to ask her about that episode!

    Your dad sounds like a real neat guy. I’m fortunate to still have mine around, even if he does drive me crazy sometimes by insisting on flying standby.

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    • Mark, I used the spelling that the TV show used. I didn’t know there was a different one, not being Hungarian, never having eaten the entree.

      Yes, your whole flying standby story of a non-visit does suggest your father might be stubborn in a way, many ways, that could be crazy-making. You get what you get, when it comes to parents.

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  60. I’d not heard the saying about oldest daughters and their fathers, but it’s certainly the case with me & my Dad. He died 5 years ago, but we lost him a few years before to dementia. One of many things I learned from him was how to laugh at myself. Here’s a story to share: when wearing a T-shirt with a jet fighter on the front and the words USAF, I was asked “what does that stand for?” My Dad, quick as a whip, replied: “it means it’s so flat you can land one of those on it”. Being a sensitive teenager, there was a flounce and a slammed door from me – only later did I appreciate his wit 😀

    I’m looking forward to the rest of G&F. I shall have to give Himself a “gentle” reminder. He struggles with Martin Sheen (the epitome of manhood in his eyes after his role in Apocalypse Now) in it. I usually tell him to man up, or get in the kitchen 😉

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    • Deb, laughing here both at your father’s joke and your response to it. From what I can tell teenage girls and dad humor never go together without some attitude involved.

      I can understand Himself’s point of view about Martin Sheen’s character in this show. Robert is a far cry from the character in Apocalypse Now. Shows how versatile Sheen is. Maybe that’s your angle, you can say “let’s watch a TV show with an amazing actor in it!”

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      • I’ve long been an admirer of Martin Sheen and agree he is an excellent actor. I was gutted I didn’t meet him when he appeared in Gandhi as I worked for the company who financed it. I met many others of the cast, but not him 😦 As to G&F, I’m afraid I’m rather mean to poor old Himself and simply torture him about his discomfort, so it’s probably my own fault he conveniently “forgets” it 😀 😀

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  61. I absolutely LOVE this post. I haven’t watched this series, but the episode you relate here makes me wish I did. Great idea. And GREAT idea to talk about our dads and their quirks. The first one that comes to my dad was me sitting in the back seat as he drove the family to my grandmother’s house, or on vacation, and after he chewed his gum for what seemed an hour, he put it behind his ear. Wow, I’d forgotten about that. And when he put the car blinker on to turn, he never remembered to turn it off. The three of us – mom, brother, and me – waited and waited for him to hear it. Finally, my mom would say TURN OFF THE BLINKER!!

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  62. I’m just starting season 4, since we are latecomers to the Netflix corral.

    I am more like my dad (personality-wise, not looks) than either of my brothers.

    My dad liked Broadway show tunes. He worked on our cars. For some time he mowed with a manual push mower. He liked to run and biked to work when it was an option. He liked to eat weird stuff like warm milk poured on toast.

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    • Eileen, Grace and Frankie is good overall, but there are stretches when I didn’t like it as much as other stretches. I adore the adult children as much as the main characters.

      Interesting how you know you’re more like your dad than your brothers. We had a manual push mower, too– now that you mention it. My mother liked the show tune and she ate “milk toast” as she called it. I don’t remember my day touching the stuff.

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  63. My dad just got back home after a 2-month hospital stay, so for this year, I’m just glad he’s home, and I can finally visit after all the dreaded-C restrictions. Thanks for sharing your memories of your dad.

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  64. Thank you, Ally, for sharing these fun facts about your father. I love his response to dawdling. I can imagine my father saying something similar. I remember a standing joke with my dad. If you got dressed up and asked him how you looked, he’d say, “Pretty…pretty ugly!” Sounds cruel, but it was actually said with warmth and always made us giggle. Why else would we keep asking?

    My parents divorced when I was six years old. My father was mostly absent until I was an adult, at which time we reconnected, but not in the same way we would have had I grown up with him. I always felt like I had missed out and he must not have loved me much. When he passed away, my sisters and I were cleaning out his apartment, and I found an old photo album on his dresser filled with photos of us as children. It was worn with use, and I realized that whatever his issues were, he had loved us and carried us with him all those years. It meant a lot to me.

    Wow, I didn’t mean to go there, but that’s what this post brought up for me.

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    • Christie, I adore your father’s “Pretty…pretty ugly!” reply to your question. It doesn’t sound cruel to me, just completely silly dad humor.

      Finding out that your father had hung onto an old album of y’all as kids would be a magical moment. He cared but maybe didn’t have a way of showing it back then. I’m pleased to know that you had a relationship with him as an adult. There’s something good in that.

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  65. I may have to go back to watching Grace and Frankie. I stopped watching after Season 2 (for no good reason that I can think of — maybe too many things to watch at the time). I like your quirky details about your dad. I will have to ponder it for a while to come up with some quirky things about my father. The things I remember don’t feel quirky (he was a police office, he had a gun that he had to carry even when he was off-duty because it was required of him as part of his job, he had to sleep at the police barracks when he was on duty for several days in a row, he did a great job of imitating Donald Duck — that last one might be quirky). Interesting about the oldest daughter being a female version of her father. I can see that to some degree, although I’d have to stand way back to see it (since I am the oldest daughter and the oldest of his five children) because I generally try to deny it.

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    • Robin, the Donald Duck impersonation is definitely quirky and would be fun as a child, as an adult too, maybe. All your memories of him as a police officer are interesting, and definitely the details a kid would notice. I don’t know if the idea that the oldest daughter is like the father is fact or fable, but it seems like it could be true. A few commenters have felt they were.

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  66. The last episode was not what I expected. It seemed gimmicky. Dolly Parton deserved a better role than that. Seemed forced.
    But I would definitely watch the whole series again. It’s a wonderful show (even with the lame finale)

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    • maytelanda, exactly! I thought the bit with Dolly seemed too contrived for the realities of Grace and Frankie. I agree about watching the whole series again, to laugh a second time.

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  67. I’m not a huge TV watcher (I tend to multitask and fall asleep). Ironically though, I finished Grace and Frankie last night (after falling asleep during the finale the night before…and my husband is traveling). I liked the Dolly Parton appearance, and I laughed out loud when Grace spilled her drink into the mic. Final episodes are tricky—bound to be disappointing with so much buildup.

    Thanks for sharing your dad. 🤍

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    • Crystal, good point about series finales. I was expecting the ending to have Grace and Frankie show more spunk, but we got to confirm that Grace and Frankie are going to be BFFs forever. Just loved the chemistry between those two!

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  68. I love what you shared about your dad–all those details, the “realness” of him. What a young age to lose a father. To never experience him in your 20’s or 30’s or 50’s. It’s also interesting how he’s shaped you in your life all those decades after. I’m glad he was a quirky character that enriched his Ally Bean. ❤

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    • Kathy, the idea of focusing on the small details about your father came straight out of Grace and Frankie. I realized that it’d be a good way to remember my father. My memories aren’t profound, but they are accurate. Maybe that counts the most!

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  70. Hi! I followed you here from your your comments on other blogs I recently found, like BusyBeeSuz and GirlInABoyHouse. I loved reading about your dad and reading all the comments about everyone’s dads.

    My dad is 96 and we’re grateful to have him each year/each month. He’s slowed down quite a bit physically but his mind is still very sharp. He was a quiet man, a disciplinarian in my memories of him when I was young. But the older he got (and maybe his children got), he became less so and I finally realized his sense of humor is so much like mine — although I’m not the oldest daughter. I think his quiet and more formal ways were borne out of his status in a very small community — he was the school principal for many years (for as long as I can remember, and I found out earlier this year or late last year that he became the principal the year I was born — that’s why I’ve known him only as the principal) and felt he had to keep up the formality with not only the children but also with the parents; he told us recently that he wanted his kids to be excellent students because there was that thing where people would ask, “How do you propose to educate our kids if you can’t yours?” Kind of a tough place to be in, but he is very proud of what he accomplished, making the school go from one of the lowest-ranked to one of the highest within a few years and helping the students to have a better chance to reach their potential.

    Thanks for writing the post….it’s so heartwarming to read and fiting for Father’s Day.

    I now feel I should watch Grace and Frankie…I may have caught glimpses of it here and there but I was not a TV watcher until recently, and I’m trying to remedy that. 🙂

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    • Hi M! Thanks for stopping by to read and comment here. Suz and Nicole are great, aren’t they?

      Your father sounds like wonderful man. 96 years old? Wow. I can imagine how he felt the community pressure to be an upstanding principal at all times, even at home. I also get how he’d want his kids to do well in school as examples of educational success. It’s cool that his sense of humor and yours jive.

      I watched Grace and Frankie over years, not all at once. I knew the end of series was coming for months, but then took my time watching it. I’m not a big TV watcher but if there’s good writing and great characters in a show, I do enjoy it. Especially when some of the topics hit close to home, being a woman of a certain age. 😊

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      • Yes, they are; I am enjoying their company (blogs)!!

        I forgot to conclude my ramblings and get to the point which is: Because of his quiet, disciplinarian persona when we were younger, I really felt that I didn’t see a lot of his quirks and playfulness so the few times I did, it was so wonderful and they stuck in my mind. Like the late afternoons he jogged around the backyard with me on his shoulders while quizzing me on my math tables or when he’d playfully tease me when he gave me a bottle (yes, I used the bottle long enough I remember 😉 ).

        Topics once we hit a certain age….yes! I have a small group of girlfriends from HS and we joke that we all need to live in a house/compound in a few years. I am looking forward to watching the series; it’ll keep me occupied for a few months!

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        • Lovely fun memories that make your dad seem human. Back in the day parents often kept their quirks and playfulness hidden, it was the way.

          I’ll be interested in knowing what you think of Grace and Frankie once you get into it. Many love it, some think it is too silly.

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  72. Haven’t even heard of this show, but it sounds cute. Chicken Paprikash is something I grew up with and is one of my daughters’ favorite dishes. Fun memories of your dad. My hubby can wiggle his ears too. Our oldest daughter is all me, not him, however. The second one’s more like him. Sorry it took forever to get to reading this! And yet, I’m reading it ON Father’s Day, so it seems kind of appropriate. 😉

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    • Betsy, Grace and Frankie are in their 70s/80s and reluctantly become best friends when their husbands come out as gay. Plus their adult children in their 30s get are part of the stories, too– and they’re as funny/wacko as their parents.

      I wish I could wiggle my ears, but alas I didn’t inherit that ability from my father. Interesting how you know one of your daughters is like your husband. I suspect what I’ve been seeing about the oldest daughter/father connection may be hearsay– but it is food for thought. Happy Father’s Day!

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  73. Pingback: For Dad on Father’s Day | A Dalectable Life

  74. I have never seen that show Ally, but based on the video you showed us, I think I’d like to see it. I hopped on Amazon and neither Season 1 or Season 2 is available – grrr. I didn’t see it as a DVD to buy either. Right now, I don’t have cable, Netflix – I’m holding off on that until I’m retired. My TV is very old, the black set with the bulbous back that looks like it will tip backward if you give it a little push, so I’d need a new TV or stream through the computer. I had to laugh at your father saying “So’s Christmas” in response to your “I’m coming, I’m coming” if you were dawdling. I got the same line from both my parents. As to my father, I haven’t seen him since 1984 and I am filled with bitterness toward him, so unfortunately it’s hard to focus on fun or quirky characteristics. He had a few moments, but was often moody or explosive. Your father, on the other hand, sounds like a lot of fun, right down to the favorite picture. When I was young, even though both my parents were very strict with me (an only child), my mother was more strict than he was. He would rise to my defense. My mother would accuse me of “playing two ends against the middle” if she would forbid something or discipline me and I’d run to him to “undo” what she said or did. That seems like a very long time ago now. I look exactly like my father – same straight and mousy brown hair, eyeglasses and I look nothing like my mom who had curly black hair and never wore glasses until her 50s. After my father left, she would look at me and say I looked so much like him that it was scary.

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    • Linda, we recently got rid of our last TV with a bulbous back. It’s not the easiest thing to do, you have to pay someone to take them now. Charities don’t want them. However our new flat TVs are able to accommodate cable and streaming channels which is cool beans.

      I was an only child, too. Both my parents were equally strict so no playing games with them; they stood firmly together. Interesting how you look so much like your father. Some kids really do seem to be carbon copies. I’m sorry to read about how things ended with him, but sometimes a parting of the ways is the best thing for all concerned.

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      • Ally – I didn’t realize that about old TVs. and charities probably get flat screen TVs now when people upgrade. There are actually two identical 19-inch TVs; each has a VCR. One set is downstairs. There used to be so many TV shows on network or cable that I got the second TV/VCR to tape extra shows. That sounds great having unlimited things to watch. I cancelled my cable in 2010.

        I used to wish I had siblings to eliminate forging paths with my parents when I got older, but looking back I’m glad they were strict with me. You wonder how a girl could be a mini-me of her father looks-wise, but it was so. Yes, it was good he left but unfortunate for my mom the manner in which he left.

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  76. It’s heartbreaking that your father passed away so young and yet it’s incredible that you have such wonderful memories so many years later. It sounds as though he had a big impact on your life despite your short time with him and honestly that’s so special. I wish I could say the same about my father. My father was in the Navy. He trained dolphins to find underwater bombs. His job description is honestly the only cool thing about him. As a parent he was a terrible person. He had moments where he tried harder to make up for us but they were short lived. My step father was challenging too. I don’t have a lot of great fatherly memories so much so that on Father’s Day I call my mom and wish her a happy Father’s Day. She was both a mom and a dad for me. My grandfather was more the father figure in my life, he passed away a few years ago and had his own issues but he was always there for me. I never once felt unloved despite the void in that roll. I’m extremely lucky, but to have had such memories with your dad as you’ve had despite how little time you spent with him… it’s a blessing. I wish you had more time with him though.

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    • LaShelle, I admit that your father’s job in the Navy does sound cool, but if he wasn’t there for you then I get why you didn’t connect with him. And you dealt with a stepfather, too? That’s a lot of emotional stuff for a kid to work through. I’m glad you had your grandfather around. I don’t think about my father often, although I’m sure he influenced me in some ways. He had a sense of humor, as did my mother, so maybe that’s where he shows up in me. After all these years he’s more a footnote in my life, rather than a main character.

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  77. I haven’t finished season seven, but this episode sounds sweet.

    I had no idea you lost your father so young; that is tragic and I’m sorry. I DO love the sweet little memories you have of him though; I giggled about the “Ants in His Pants” and “So’s Christmas”!

    My Dad was a different sort of father; not always the best as he had his own personal demons to deal with, but I know he loved me. He passed away at 52 when I was just 25 and a new mom. He had some funny sayings though and OF COURSE, I SAY THEM TOO. When preparing meatloaf you must say out loud to someone: “Don’t let your meat loaf” and if you see someone with messy hair you must ask: “Did you brush your hair with the leg of a chair?”
    Oddly enough, my children who didn’t meet him also say these things.

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    • Suz, my father was older and not well most of my childhood, so when he died it was expected, although sad of course. The “ants in my pants” bit got me laughing every time. He was a complicated man, but his sense of humor was silly and geared at making me laugh.

      I love your dad’s “Don’t let your meat loaf” saying. That’s perfect dad humor. I adore knowing your children say his sayings, too. Granted kids say the darnedest things, but to be able to trace it back to your father is sweet.

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  78. I loved reading about your dad. I can almost picture him. Sounds like he was a huge presence. How painful it must’ve been to lose him. These kinds of holidays bother me. Makes me feel sad for the parentless and the childless with no one to celebrate with. I like your outlook, remembering those fun things about your dad.
    My dad is a great story teller. I loved hearing the funny stories of his escapades when he was younger. His birthday happens to be on St. Patrick’s Day. 🍀 Also his name. 🙂

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    • Lori, I know what you mean about holidays like Father’s Day or Mother’s Day, for some people they can be difficult bringing up all sorts of unwanted feelings while for other people they are holidays to celebrate enthusiastically.

      Your dad is a storyteller and that sounds like fun– especially the part about escapades. What’s not to love? Patrick sounds like a good guy.

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  81. Hi, Ally – I just scrolled through your comments to get here. That’s one HECK of a lot of comments!! 😀
    My father died just before I turned 18, so my memories of him are mostly from a child’s/teenager’s perspective. Like your Dad, mine could: wiggle his ears and was camera-shy. Whenever we went to the ice-cream parlour he would always ask for “something weird”. It’s funn the things that we remember!

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    • Donna, I know about the comments. Given the opportunity to talk about fathers EVERYONE joined in. I like your dad’s request for something weird at the ice cream parlor. That’s exactly the kind of fun thing to remember about a parent that makes them seem human. Thanks for sharing that here.

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  82. Aw I love hearing the little tidbits about your pop, Ally! He sounds like such a funny guy (S’os Christmas LOLL)! I will be add that to my repertoire lol

    The thing I remember most about my dad was how creative he was. We grew up without a lot of money so he always made toys out of household recycling… he always did everything he could to make our living conditions bearable and I took it for granted then but now I am reminded of it whenever I see an empty yogurt bucket or an empty egg carton and think of creative ways to play with it for Charlotte’s sake. While my husband and I live in so much more abundance than what we had growing up, I still want my daughter to enjoy the same ‘privileges’ I had growing up… being able to see everything with possibility and joy 🙂

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  83. I can wiggle my ears too! But this is so true that we don’t remember much about our parent’s professions but rather the little things. The way they made us laugh. The things that impacted us emotionally

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  84. When I’d ask my Dad where he was going he would say, ‘to see a man about a dog,’ but then he’d never come home with a dog, I was very confused!

    I have lots of traits of my Dad, a big imagination, a bucketful of patience until the bucket runs dry then there’s no forgiveness, and an ability to dream big.

    I’ve never seen Grace and Frankie but if we get it in the UK I may give it a watch, though maybe not if the ending was disappointing.

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    • Rae Cod, it’s fascinating to read about how people are like their parents in certain ways. I like the “see a man about a dog” line.

      Grace and Frankie is a good show overall. It’s wonderful to see older women portrayed as with it and dynamic. Plus the show is funny. As for the last episode it wasn’t awful, just not what I expected.

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  85. I completely missed this post! It’s like a Christmas present! I’m sorry you lost your father when you were so young, Ally
    Grace and Frankie is one of my favorite shows. You’ve inspired me to watch the final season. I only saw a little of the first episode of the final season and wasn’t interested, but my parents just finished it and said it was good. Something to look forward to. Xoxo

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    • Kari, Grace and Frankie is one of those TV shows that makes me laugh because of, or in spite of, the absurd situations they get themselves into. I laughed through most of the season, although there are some tender moments too. Hope you get the chance to watch it through. The series ended in its own unique way.

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