Throw Us A Bone, We’re Trying To Name Our New Friend

/ Ally Bean
PLEASE HELP US

As you will notice as you read along, scattered throughout this post are photos of our new friend, a life-size posable plastic skeleton.

I cannot lie about why I spent the money to buy him.  IT’S ALL KARI’S FAULT.  She showed us her skeleton friend, Roger, and I needed to have one of my very own to keep me company.

In other words I loved her idea, so I copied it.

However this fellow desperately needs a name and so far we’ve come to a dead end. [pun intended]

You see, and I’m sure you’ll understand that, when an English Lit major & a history buff attempt to name inanimate objects, things go sideways.

Oh sure, THERE ARE MEANINGFUL IDEAS APLENTY with sound theoretical underpinnings, but to actually pull the trigger on the naming, well– that has yet to happen.  [again pun intended]

Below I’ve listed the possibilities we’re pondering.  Do you, my gentle readers and Halloween aficionados, like any of these names?  OR do you have a better one to suggest?

Just like the air moving through the bones of this skeleton, we are open to ideas.

10 POSSIBLE NAMES FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

WILD BILL [Hickok], as a tribute to he who was shot holding black aces and eights, aka the Dead Man’s Hand, which leads to the next name on the list…

CHARLIE, as in the man who dealt the Dead Man’s Hand, a fellow named Charlie Henry Rich whose grave I featured in a post years ago

McCOY, as in the character from StarTrek whose nickname was “Bones” but you probably know that

CAPTAIN JACK, either [Sparrow], Johnny Depp of movie fame, or [Harkness], Jon Barrrowman of Dr. Who fame, choose your franchise 

SHELLEY, because on Murdoch Mysteries Dr. Emily Grace named the morgue skeleton this name for reasons that I conjecture might be related to the next name on the list…

PERCY, as in Percy Bysshe Shelley who wrote the poem “Ozymandias” giving us the timeless message: “And on the pedestal these words appear: ‘My name is Ozymandias, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!’ Nothing beside remains.”  

YORICK, because when Willy Shakes writes a play like Hamlet, there has to be an applicable quote: “Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy…”

EARL OF GRANTHAM, because this skeleton does have an aristocratic bearing like Robert Crawley and is without funds 

THE PREACHER, as in Ecclesiastes, a chapter in the Bible, & the famous spooky picture by Charles Allen Gilbert titled “All is Vanity” that is a reference to this Biblical quote: “Vanity of vanities, says the Preacher, vanity of vanities! All is vanity.“ 

AND FINALLY THREE READER COMMENTS…

About sharing photos of the mundane:

“Yep. I agree — reality is infinitely more interesting than the scrubbed and filtered, highly tweaked social media images…. Fantasy – just fantasy.”

~ Victoria

“… I’m totally obsessed with the idea of the Muse of The Mundane…. And suddenly I saw her – she’s actually two-sided like a coin. Her other side is the Muse of The Magical. Makes sense doesn’t it? Magic is always hidden in the mundane, we just don’t often use our eyes to see it.”

~ Deborah Weber

“My daughter and I had this discussion recently about photos…. The photos that get the most, often unexpected positive responses are the ones that have an ‘it’ quality. Goosebumps…a new perspective… and not perfection.”

~ Erica/Erika

220 thoughts on “Throw Us A Bone, We’re Trying To Name Our New Friend”

  1. When I name a cat, I always try to use two syllables to that I can properly scold (just like my mama). I’m partial to Shelley but you have a lot of good ones here! A neighbor has a dinosaur skeleton out all year long. It’s probably at least 12′ tall. Some days it looks like the kids were having fun with new positions!

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    • Kate, a dinosaur skeleton? Oh that’s amazing. Your two syllable approach to naming makes sense. I mean this guy isn’t “Joe” now is he? I like Shelley, too. Dr. Emily Grace is one of my favorite characters on Murdoch Mysteries.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. You are a brave family! I would not have a plastic skeleton even it is free and sitting along with me during lunch or dinner is scary 😂. Anyhow all names are good. Hope you enjoy with month with him!!!!

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    • ganga1996, I take your point. It is a little disconcerting to walk into the kitchen first thing in the morning and see a skeleton sitting at the table. We plan on putting him outside eventually.

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    • Linda, ha! I like where you’re heading with this idea. Click and Clack would be a great duo. I’ll keep that in mind should we decide to spring for another skeleton. [They ain’t cheap.]

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  8. Love this! I’m with Autumn…Yorick for the win…yes, definitely humerus. 😊 Too funny! But truthfully, Ally, you had me at “Willy Shakes”. Yes!
    We had a far less attractive skeleton-as-Halloween-decoration once upon a time and we called him “Slim”. Your guy is sturdier, though. Slim was a flimsy tissue paper and cardboard wannabe. Thanks for the fun post! xo!

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  9. No literary references, or movie or tv references or any references at all – as soon as I saw him the name “Clive” jumped into my head – he just looks like a Clive…

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    • I rather like the Earl of Grantham, for the reasons you listed. You could always call him EOG for short. As in ee-aug.

      But… Arlene has a good point about Percy rolling off the tongue. It does seem a shame that nothing will ever roll off THIS poor chap’s tongue again.

      As a side note, I’m wondering about his poker stare. I’d imagine it’s tough to tell what kind of “hand” he has.

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      • An Audience of One, I like how you’ve turned a formal title into something more casual that may suit him better. But Percy does have a vibe to it that suits this fellow as well. These are the variables we have to consider as we pick name for him.

        You’re right about the poker face. One can never know for sure what he’s thinking– especially when his skull is hollow.

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  11. I love that you have a random poker playing skeleton at your table. That beats pumpkins for Halloween decorations all day long.
    As for names, don’t overthink it…. I’m thinking something simple, as in, “Oh, that’s just Bob. Pay him no mind. He doesn’t eat much.”
    😉

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  12. Manfred. No idea why that popped into my head when I saw him although it seems appropriate for both a Lit major and history buff household. I had no idea, but Manfred apparently is a dramatic poem by Byron with “supernatural elements” considered Gothic fiction according to Wiki. Perhaps he’s worthy of a seance. That way he can speak for himself…

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    • Deb, as a child I liked Tom Terrific cartoons and his dog was named Might Manfred. I didn’t know about Byron’s poem so that makes the name a very good contender, with two connections in its favor. I do like the idea of a seance that allows whoever this guy is to talk for himself. I’ve no bone to pick about that idea. 😁

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    • Micheal Brooks, that’s a good idea. I can see the logic of him being Billy Butcherson plus I’d always be reminded that I need to watch Hocus Pocus 2. Kind of a win-win

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  16. Throw us a bone…hilarious, Ally! I like all your names and the reasons behind them. I’m kinda partial to Earl of Grantham.

    But Ace is the name that popped up for me. Or Shirley – because if your friend’s skeleton is Roger, it reminds me of the movie Airplane and “Don’t call me Shirley!”

    Can’t wait to hear the results!

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  19. In context with your photo which implies a lifestyle – I emphatically choose Wild Bill. The others are nice but don’t seem to reflect his perceived/hinted at personality from the photo. BTW: a neighbor on the other block puts up (more like constructs!) a huge skeleton (taller than his house, I kid you not, they are very into Halloween) and ****I**** call him “Big Guy” as I pass him on my daily walks.

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    • Robin, Jerry is a great name for this dude. I LIKE IT! We didn’t even think of that line of reasoning which is a sad reflection on us. I felt the same way about needing a skeleton after reading Kari’s post. If you find one [it took us 3 stores before we did] I look forward to learning what you name it.

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  22. Yorick was the name I thought of before getting to your list (once an English major, always an English major), but now that I see Earl of Grantham–which I love (having read so many novels featuring English nobility)–I’d like to suggest Earl. You could then hit two literary allusions with one stone, referencing, of course, the classic Dixie Chicks (now known only as Chicks) song “Goodbye Earl.”

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  24. I like the history lesson about Wild Bill and Charlie! Interesting. But my favorite name listed here was Willy Shakes. It’s funny and it makes sense. Of course he shakes, he’s constantly cold!

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  25. Well I tried to resist the name the skeleton bait, but I couldn’t. So here they are in the order they came to me. For no good reason whatsoever, Ichabod (Crane). Then I thought if you dig deeper I think you could come up with another, less famous pirate. Then I thought, what if it’s not Male. Elizabeth Swan?

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    • 9erick, Ichabod is good, but Elizabeth Swann is better. It brings together our Captain Jack idea and elevates it. Or maybe we could call the skeleton Grace O’Malley, the famous Irish woman pirate? You’ve opened up a whole new line of thinking. Thanks.

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  28. When naming something, I always try out the choices for a while and see which one comes naturally to my lips! 🙂 I would go for one-word ones myself. If I were to name it Captain Jack, it would become either Captain or Jack.

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  29. This made my entire week. I can just picture you going to Target to get your “Roger,” then setting him up to play cards and naming him! And the names in the comments are hilarious. Roger, by the way, will become a year-round fixture in our home. I’m not sure what your plans are…no pressure. 😂

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  30. LOL!! Your name choices are so much more creative than what we came up with for our Skeleton. #1 Grandson named him Skelly. We had a blast for a couple of October’s posing him around the house and yard. He’s got a broken leg now I noticed this past week-end while visiting over there.

    I like Bones, but I’m a Star Trek fan. Let us know what you finally pick for its name.

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    • Bijoux, we plan to put him outside for trick-or-treat night. I’m tired of him in the kitchen, so I think I will start moving him around the house, but without the Elf on the Shelf mischievousness. I’m too lazy for that.

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    • Marian, we both like Percy, truth be told– and it’s still a contender. The thing about this skeleton is that we began tossing names out there while we were driving home in the car with it, and have been punning about it ever since. It just lends itself to fun. And blog posts.

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  37. What a fun idea. My daughter (age 25) was just asking the other day which of the halloween decorations at the store appealed to me and I said “I don’t decorate anymore now that all you kids are grown.” She was disappointed and clearly I need to rethink my decorating ideas because you seem to have no trouble making the season fun. I just keep thinking of the hassle of taking all the things out of storage, putting them up, dusting them, taking them down and putting them back in storage. It’s all too much for me. As for names, how about Ozzy (for Percy’s quote “My name is Ozymandius.” Looking forward to hearing the final result. You will tell us, won’t you?

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    • Janet, we don’t do a lot of decorating for any holiday, but once I saw how much fun Kari was having with Roger I wanted to join in. He’s lightweight and doesn’t require any batteries or an electrical outlet so in some ways a skeleton is the perfect decoration. Ozzy is a wonderful name for him, partly because of the poem, partly because of Ozzy Osbourne, the “Prince of Darkness” as I recall.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Barbara, a few other commenters have wondered the same thing. I have no idea why we defaulted to male instead of female, although Shelley could be a name that works for either. Weird how the brain works, eh?

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  41. How fun! A friend of mine lived in the Bahamas for many years and bought a skeleton there. When she decided to come back home, she enjoyed the very real possibility that her package would be searched at customs. I’m not sure I’d have enjoyed that! Your names are all great. For me it comes down to McCoy and YORICK. I’ll pick Yorick because it’s more fun. – Marty

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    • Marty, your friend brought a skeleton back from the Bahamas! I’m sure customs would have been interested if they knew it was there. That’s a great story.

      Both McCoy and Yorick have a certain ring to them. And would be easy to explain should I ever have to justify our choice for this skeleton’s name. 🙄

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  43. I like just plain Mr. Bones, because it reminds me of Rosemary Clooney singing that vaudeville song in White Christmas – “Tell a little story, Mr. Bones….a funny little story Mr. Bones.” at least I think that’s how it goes. I’m sure your skeleton has stories to tell, especially on Halloween. Idea for a blog?

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      • Oh, we’ll, secret: we actually have 2 now LOL hal sits out front by entrance in a chair. The other one looks like it’s climbing up the side of the shop. Don’t have a name for the 2nd one, but considering Martha. IDK. There are some pretty cute names in your comments, so I might steal one of those instead 🎃

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        • Oh I’m sure you’ll be able to find a good name for your second skeleton among all the ideas here. Commenters have been a hoot, providing very logical and unique names. I am impressed that you have two skeletons. And us with only our first nameless one…

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  47. How about Cal, short for calcium . . . no bones about it, bones need their calcium. No idea how you will choose. Some great ideas. Have fun with him. We are enoying, some of us more than others – which is a mystery that will be cleared up in my post tomorrow, our Gumby. He has no bones – more of a bendy fellow.

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    • Ernie, I love your sense of humor. Oh my, never would I ever have thought of this name yet it makes sense. Gumby is a bendy flexible dude, boneless I suppose. Looking forward to reading what you have to report about him.

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      • All the better 🙂 Being a fan of trivia, I once learned that a British cartoonist in Napoleon’s time was trying to make fun of him, so he drew him short on purpose and that really took off, but in fact, Napoleon was at least of average height for the time.

        On another interesting trivia note, at least in the US, the person who tends to win office tends to be, on average, taller than the loser. I guess calling someone short is a euphemism for “loser”? :O

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    • Susan, oh you are good, picking a name that just happens to be on our list of possibilities before you read the list. Charlie does seem to fit our new friend. Especially knowing he likes to play cards!

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  54. You have put a lot of great thought into names!!!

    We are a family of nicknames and one of our favourites is Hector. I have no idea who/when/where we came up with this, but I will often call my son by this name…and he responds! (Actually both our kids will respond to just about anything because we’re constantly making up names). But Hector always gets some sideways looks in public! Just this summer at the park I called out – without thinking – “Time to go Hector” and my son didn’t miss a beat in getting up and coming. And a little kid looked at me to say – Did you really name a child Hector??? No, I didn’t, but the name gives me the warm fuzzies because it has stuck for so long in our family.

    So, my vote has to be for Hector (which sounds a bit like Hannibal Lecter which is pretty darn scary)?

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    • Elisabeth, we’ve put too much thought into naming this skeleton. From the minute we bought him our ruminations began.

      It’s funny that you use the name Hector for your son– and he knows it. I also love that a random kid at the park called you out on that name. I mean, that in and of itself is worth using the name in public.

      You’re right that Hector can have a Hannibal Lecter vibe to it, sounding like a melding of the two names. And in this case it might make sense.

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    • Pete, ha! Well, we could go with Read ‘Em and Weep, and it is a clever name, but it’s also a mouthful to say when referring to a bunch of bones. I’m partial to Captain Jack, the Dr. Who one.

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  56. I like Captain Jack. No good reason. I just like the way it sounds. If I had a skeleton around the house, I’d enjoy calling him Captain Jack.

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  57. Skeletons never fail to bring to mind Ray Harryhausen’s animated warriors from the movie, Jason and the Argonauts. I would probably call him “Harry” for short.

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    • Ian Kay, I’ve never seen that movie. Thanks for the link to the scene. It’s bizarre and funny and memorable. I see why you thought of this movie when you saw our skeleton dude. Perhaps those skeletons are his ancestors, eh?

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  58. Excellent name choices. Makes me wonder, how does one know what sex the skeleton is…is it anatomically correct and you bought a male one? Regardless, it is a fun visitor at this time of year. My mom had one that she loved to sit out in a lawn chair in her front yard to greet the trick-or-treaters. I wonder why I just can’t get past the option to choose Shelley as my vote for the name. 😉

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  61. Ally, I ran out of time trying to catch up in WP this morning before I started work, but must get into the spirit of your post which I read yesterday on Twitter. How about Bonehead?

    At Heritage Park, they have an old house which is designated as the Taylor Historical Society. There are several events the Society hosts throughout the year and they have a skeleton they dress up and position at each event, all except Halloween as he sans clothes then. 🙂 Their skeleton’s name is “Skelly” which is similar to your “Shelley”.

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    • Linda, Bonehead is a good name for this dude. It makes sense in a literal way, but I suspect when it comes to brain power he is also a bonehead! I know people keep their skeletons out year round and dress them accordingly. That’s fun, but a bit beyond me. I think whatever name this guy turns out to have, he’s going to be seasonal.

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      • Ha ha – well he is good for a laugh for the season. I agree with you on that, one season only.

        In the tiny town of Romeo, which is not near me, there is a street that homeowners go all out every Halloween. Each house on Tillson Street has a macabre scene with skeletons dressed up in various scenes, like getting marriage, having tea, sitting around the living room with the family – all skeletons. It sounds silly, but the little town is known for this ritual and people come for miles around to see it.

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        • That does sound like a fun place to visit for the skeletons. They have something good going on. We live in a subdivision where many people go all out, but it’s a variety of themes and then there are houses, like ours, where the owners do as little as possible to join in. We want to look like we know which holiday it is, but can’t be arsed to go all out.

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    • Linda, yours is a clever suggestion for a name. I see your logic and have to admit that I didn’t even think of the TV show Bones. How sad is that? I overlooked the obvious.

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  63. I love this Ally!

    We got our first skeleton a few years ago & he gets a new friend every Halloween…we called ours Marvin (starvin Marvin), he now has a pedigree skulldog called Hank (Hank Marvin is cockney slang for starving) and a butler called Freaderick! This years addition is a rat, don’t have a name for that yet!

    I like the preacher, not sure why but it sounds sinister!

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    • Rae Cod, you’re an inspiration to me with your skeleton *family.* Love the idea of Starvin’ Marvin because it seems spot on. I don’t know what I’d name a rat other than Templeton from Charlotte’s Web. Probably not creepy enough.

      I like The Preacher, too– but there seems to be reluctance within Chez Bean to go with it.

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    • Donna, smart reasoning about why this skeleton dude should be named Wild Bill. Not everyone knows about the aces and eights hand in poker– and how it lead to Wild Bill’s demise.

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  66. You’ve given your skeleton much deep thought. I’m not sure I could top any of those proposed names, so I’m just going to vote for McCoy. Truth be told, I was going to suggest “Bones” – I’m a not-very-clever English major!

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    • The Travel Architect, your reasons for liking Earl are wonderful and personal. I didn’t realize that there was a Grantham, England, but of course there is. Earl is popular among commenters and is shooting up the chart with a bullet, like they used to say.

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  68. I love this guy and I know you guys will have much enjoyment with him. I could not think of a suitable name for him on my own, but I do love the ones you chose. My fave is McCoy!!
    Happy almost Halloween Mr. McCoy.

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    • Suz, I feel that this skeleton dude and I are going to have a long friendship. He is just the jolt of absurdity we need around here. He does look like he could be a McCoy. I take your point.

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  69. After reading your post and all the comments (which took quite a while!), I cannot add anything to the discussion. You’ve got so many name choices and cheesy puns already. But I am dying to know what name you chose, so I hope you will provide an update soon!

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    • Christie, this is one of those posts that has elicited so many great responses that I’m not sure what we’ll do. But I’ve had a lot of laughs along the way. Thanks for lending your support to our cause. Will update when a decision is made.

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  70. I don’t think I have anything good to add to this lively discussion. Great puns, great names, great fun. And now I want to have a life-size posable plastic skeleton because who wouldn’t???

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    • See, Robin, that’s how I got hooked into this idea. Like I said, I blame it on Kari. Of course now that I found a skeleton we have to name it. One thing leads to another…

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  71. LOL, Ally….I loved all the names you came up with and all the recommended names. My first thought was Slim. But I doubt I would’ve named a skeleton that because it was a nickname of an ancestor. It might freak me out each time I called it by that. Ha ha! I am looking forward to hearing what name you decide on and how he does on his first “show” time.

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    • M, Slim has a ring to it and does seem fitting for a skeleton. He certainly doesn’t have much meat on his bones. The jury is still out on which name we’ll go with. I know for us it’ll be big deal to set him on Halloween, but I bet for the kids who come begging he’ll be one of many.

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      • Thank you😊. Just wondering why we seem to all be offering Male names only. Is there a possibility that this fellow *surprise surprise*could be a lady skeleton?

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        • A few other commenters have asked that question, too. I hate to admit it but it never dawned on me that this could be a female skeleton, I immediately defaulted to male. I’m sure that suggests something about how I’ve been socialized– or some such. We’re open to all names, and in fact Shelley could be for either a boy or a girl. Still… excellent question…

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  78. Back from camping Ally and joining the party a few days late. I am able to read all of the fun comments. And, yes, make no bones about the importance of a name. 😊The puns are flowing and witty in this entire post and comments. I see variations on the Wild Bill and Willy Shakes…Not sure if Wild Willy is in the running here? Re the male/female skeleton? I don’t know whether it is an anatomically correct skeleton? 😊Yes, Ally, I have been in the woods for too long.😎 (I sent you a personal note on Instagram re: photos…thanks for the shoutout)

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    • Erica/Erika, when I hit publish on this post I figured there’d be a lot of punning going on in the comments. That I’d rattle a few bones with this request for suggestions for names. You’re the first to put Wild Bill + Willy Shakes together into one name. VERY CLEVER.

      I got your message on IG and I think I replied to it in the right place. Truth bomb, I get confused over there about how to answer DMs and where to leave comments on photos. Anyhoo, thanks for thanking me. 😊

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  79. I am terrible at naming things. It was actually a bit of a joke at work since I named the innovation process we used, “The Innovation Process”. Counterpart to me in another area of the business called their’s “The Playpen” and another “The Illumination Approach”. And yes, my blog is called Retirement Transition because it’s about…. retirement transition. I know where to go now for naming support! That said, I love a lot of your ideas – but McCoy and Yorick are my favs. I am thinking of stealing McCoy for our dinosaur skeleton… I was a big Star Trek fan years ago (the original ST, not later ones). Very curious where you’ll end up.

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    • Pat, I get what you mean about naming things and projects. It can be daunting. In some ways it seems impossible, yet there’s a bit of whimsy in the process. I like both McCoy and Yorick, for obvious reasons. I am a Star Trek fan, so you know which way I’m leaning, yet so many good reasons for naming the skeleton something else. what to do, what to do?

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    • Maggie, I’m with you in that Shelley seems like a good name for our skeleton, but Earl is a commenter favorite. Yes, we both enjoy Murdoch Mysteries, the plots, the characters, the settings– love it all.

      Liked by 1 person

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