I’m not a fussbudget about your word choice. I prefer that your words be nuanced and precise, but if they aren’t most of the time I let it go. ‘Cuz I’m a kindhearted English major, you know?
I didn’t used to be like this, but I’ve mellowed over the years because, ironically, people have disappointed me so many times that I’ve become charmingly cynical, with incredibly low expectations about what people do or how they do it.
And it’s from this jaded point of view that I’m going to tell you, my gentle readers, about a local realtor who upon selling a house, puts a sign out in front of it that says:
GOT BOUGHT!
Apparently the time-honored SOLD will not work. Nope, this realtor goes with what I can only assume is a play on the “Got Milk?” marketing campaign, combined with a good old-fashioned rhyme.
I get that this is a clever + seemingly harmless use of the English language.
And I also admit, openly and freely, that what I’m going to write in the next paragraph contradicts one of my favorite sayings: “do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?”
But in this particular case I’m going to declare that I. Want. To. Be. Right. I want to see SOLD signs. Now tell me, my gentle readers, is that asking too much?
About 100 years ago this car would have been my preferred set of wheels, especially if it came standard with a dog. Obviously. { photo via Library of Congress }
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OF LATE I’VE HAD MORE OPPORTUNITIES THAN USUAL TO drive to and from the airport. Considering where we live in Ohio, our closest international airport is in Kentucky, meaning that I have to drive on an interstate highway to cross over the Ohio River to get there.
It’s all about geography.
I can do this by EITHER driving on the outer belt through Ohio, across a bridge into Kentucky.
OR, if there is an accident in my way or construction delays, I can drive in the other direction on the outer belt through Ohio, then through Indiana, across a bridge into Kentucky.
The excitement? It never ends.
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IT IS WHILE SASHAYING AROUND THE AFOREMENTIONED INTERSTATE OUTER BELT SYSTEM THAT I’ve come to notice, on huge bridge signs, that Ohio, Kentucky, and Indiana have new-to-me state slogans*.
Ohio, formerly “THE HEART OF IT ALL” is now “SO MUCH TO DISCOVER”
Kentucky, formerly “WHERE EDUCATION PAYS” is now “UNBRIDLED SPIRIT”
Indiana, formerly “CROSSROADS OF AMERICA” is now “HONEST-TO-GOODNESS INDIANA”
Seeing these state slogans, writ large [literally and figuratively], got me thinking about branding, albeit in a narcissistic way. That is, what might I use as my personal slogan?
If I had to have one. Which to my knowledge I do not. Yet.
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THUS WANTING TO BE PREPARED FOR ANY CONTINGENCY and bored out of my gourd while driving, I compiled the following list** of potential Ally Bean slogans.
Should you be of a mind to help me decide what my personal slogan should be, please indulge me and do the following two things:
Indicate your preferred slogan for moi, by answering the simple poll question below.
If you have a personal slogan, I’d love to know what it is. Yours might be better than mine and it’s not too late for me to steal it from you I could be inspired by it.
Thank you in advance for your immediate input on this totally irrelevant, but blogworthy, issue that has come to plague me as I drive hither and yon around the interstate outer belt system.
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* I’ve no idea how often these slogans change. All I know is what my addled brain remembers, a faulty system at best– and these state slogans seem different from what I remember them being before.
** Oddly enough, most of these potential slogans are ones that I’ve used in various places online over the years. Or, ideas I wrote down intending to use as topics for blog posts.
Decorative tile, laying on the floor, that’ll be the accent in the shower and by the sinks.
Well, kids, not everything runs smoothly during a remodel. You see, there’s been a kerfuffle here about the wall tile that goes in the shower stall. Not the little decorative stuff*, but the large tiles that cover the walls.
The problem, quite simply, has been that the tile company sent the correct decorative and floor tiles over to the house– but filled our wall tile order incorrectly. They sent packages of tile with the same name + code number, but these packages of tile weren’t from the same “dye lots” so they weren’t the exact same color.
Which they are supposed to be.
Example of the tile in question.
Thus began what turned out to be 3 weeks of discussions among unhappy me, lawyerly Zen-Den, our patient project manager, the perturbed remodeling company design staff, the conscientious tile installer– and the confused [sneaky?] tile company.
Much was said, politely— but with a great deal of emphasis on MAKE THIS RIGHT.
No pithy conclusion to this post. I’m just happy to report that the correct wall tile finally arrived on Tuesday and that each package has the same batch number.
Even more exciting than getting the tile is knowing that the tile guy is now in the process of installing the tile on the walls in the shower– and that the walls coordinate beautifully with the shower floor.
As planned.
Tile on the floor of the shower stall, installed and looking lovely.
* I wrote this post yesterday mid-afternoon. As the tile guy left late yesterday afternoon he told me that the tile company had shorted us on the decorative tile that is to go on the wall behind the sinks. This is not as big of a problem as the wall tile kerfuffle, but it’s a problem that will have to be solved nonetheless. *le sigh*
It will come as no surprise to you, but it’s a mess around here.
Dining room with stuff from other rooms in it.
√ Nothing is where it’s supposed to be. Rooms that aren’t being remodeled have been turned into storage spaces for the stuff from rooms that are being remodeled.
Then with no clothes dryer, we’re using portable wooden racks, wedged into bedroom corners, to dry our clothes and towels and unmentionables… that are getting covered in a layer of dust before they dry, courtesy of the construction all over the house.
√ Because the family room and the master suite are under construction, Zen-Den and I are living on the other side of the upstairs, each having taken up camp in a different guest bedroom. At night we shout “good night” to each other like we’re the fricking Waltons: “Good night, Sue Mary Ellen… Good night, John-Boy.”
Old microwave sitting on counter underneath spot where it fit, but new ones won’t.
√ I officially hate microwaves. Did you know that the manufacturers change the sizes of microwaves fairly often? This means that the one we had built into the kitchen cabinets 9 years ago is now a size that is no longer available.
So we have to redesign the cabinets to accommodate the newer deeper microwaves. I cannot *mutter* enough about this development.
√ When the water is off for a few hours you immediately understand there’s one flush left in the toilet, right? BUT what you might not remember is that there’ll be no water to wash your hands– and that you’ll need to have some hand wipes around. IF you don’t have them around, then you’ll end up eating your lunch using a paper towel as you hold your sammie– then perhaps accidentally ingest some paper towel. 😖
Tools and such that are now on the floor hither and yon around the house.
√ And finally, how is that I helped? Well, as if there’s not enough destruction around here, I added to it when I went to close the bathroom door and the handle fell off into my hand.
Just. Like. That. I’m stuck outside the bathroom, holding the formerly useful handle in my hand, looking forlornly at the screws now at my feet. Screws that happen to be about the same color as the carpeting, allowing them to blend perfectly with the carpet fibers, causing Ms. Bean to become FRAZZLED.
And on that cheery note, I’ll wish y’all a happy weekend. Catch up with you later, kids.
THE SPECTACLED BEAN 