Forget Resolutions, These Are My 2023 New Year’s Rejections

January 4, 2023January 4, 2023 / Ally Bean / 239 Comments

My brain trust. Obviously

How My New Year’s Rejections Came To Be

THANKS TO EVERYONE who read my last post and answered my question, a call to action, about what I should write about next. You’re the best, my personal brain trust. I was feeling indecisive and needed some help.

I’ve never asked for guidance like that before and given the chance to tell me what to do y’all came through. Come to find out my brain trust wants me to write about what I’m rejecting in 2023.

Oddly enough I tossed that topic into the choices at the last minute before hitting publish.

A friend and I had been talking about how comfortable we are rejecting trends and ideas that at one time would have seemed important to us. We got laughing about what we dubbed our New Year’s Rejections.

We weren’t saying that a particular idea, a solution, or a way of living is bad for everyone, just that something doesn’t work for us. Rejection is a sound concept if you’re clear about your underlying assumptions and what space you’ll create in your life because of it.

What I’m Rejecting This Year

GETTING TO MY LIST of New Year’s Rejections a la 2023, I give you the following that I shall be rejecting for at least a year, maybe longer:

√ Newsletters – From a marketing point of view I understand them. They’re a way for a business/author to distribute information to their customers/readers keeping everyone up to date. They’re predicated on the hope that the customer/reader actually reads the newsletter and doesn’t send it directly to spam.

However as a person who receives these newsletters, I don’t like them. I rarely read them because they seem more like advertisements for new products than sources of information. There’s no engagement with the company/author and I sense I’m a mark, a pawn in someone’s game. This makes me feel irritable so I’ve unsubscribed to the ones I was receiving.

Assumption rejected? I am gaining valuable insight and information.

√ Cocktails – As I imbibed a few over the holidays I realized that: 1) I wasn’t taken with any of them; 2) they were fussy and expensive; and 3) that I prefer a shot of top-shelf liquor neat, or on the rocks, or with a splash of club soda. Thus I’ve decided to simplify my life, save money, and forgo mixed drinks.

Assumption rejected? I am having fun because I’m drinking something fancy.

√ Steps Per Day – I’ve never been one to judge my physical healthiness based exclusively on numbers, whether the numbers are external validation &/or criticism. I think that trusting myself to know how to live my life is the best approach, especially when it comes to walking.

To wit, there’ll be no recording of my steps each day. Instead, I’ll move when I want to, the amount I want to. I’ll walk with no preconceived idea [10,000 steps] of what I have to accomplish each day.

Assumption rejected? I am being healthy by focusing on and knowing a number.

√ Sweet potatoes/yams – Okay, I understand the reason why these starchy vegetables are good for me. They’re filled with fiber and minerals and magical properties helpful to women of a certain age. However, potatoes shouldn’t be sweet, they just shouldn’t. If I eat a potato, it’s going to be a basic old Idaho spud– or some redskin new potatoes.

Assumption rejected? I am eating something good for me.

√ Word of the Year – In 2011 I started picking one word to be my word of the year. I’ve continued this tradition for about a decade BUT more years than not my word of the year hasn’t made me feel good about my life.

That is, instead of getting a smoother or simplified or enjoyable year, I’ve gotten the opposite. The gods have laughed in my face. Thus I’m foregoing a word of the year to see if, by chance, I don’t need it.

Assumption rejected? I am living my best life because I circle back to a word, a 21st century talisman for self-improvement.

AND FINALLY THREE READER COMMENTS…

ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCES with Alexa:

“Our Alexa is a buttinsky quite often. Just yesterday, I was chatting with my husband and daughter about crackers and Alexa piped up, “I’ve added crackers to your grocery list.” No thank you, Alexa. And then she wanted to know if we wanted a suggestion for something she thinks we need to re-order. NO THANK YOU ALEXA.”

~ Suzanne

“That’s funny what Alexa did and said. I’ve had her answer questions on TV when her name is said in a commercial or TV show.”

~ Jean

“We have never activated Alexa or Siri on any of our devices, finding the idea of them sitting there listening to our inane chatter rather creepy. Unbeknownst to us, however, my husband’s new Kindle reader came with Alexa activated. One evening, we were watching some show in which an actor asked his device to find a particular song he had been looking for. Almost immediately, a voice came from Bill’s Kindle asking if this was the song we were looking for, and some piece of music started playing. We did lose our stuffing, and disabled the little snoop faster than you can sing ‘Hit the Road, Jack.'”

~ Donna

When Muse Is Feeling Blah, There Are Random Links To Share On A Tuesday

December 6, 2022December 7, 2022 / Ally Bean / 188 Comments

I’ve been feeling under the weather this week with a sore throat and my ears hurt. And I have a headache.

I just want to sleep.

I’ll survive, but I can’t think of much to write about today, so how about I share some links with you, my gentle readers and kind lurkers?

That’s a good way for me to make the world a little more clear, a little less cluttered, and not ugly.

Enjoy

EIGHT INTERESTING LINKS TO SHARE

Laverne DeFazio did it first, but now Lindsay Lohan is saying it’s naughty? Become aware of this commercial and remember that everything old is new again

Looking for a true crime podcast that provides insights into the curated, somewhat pretentious, world of modern art? Listen to Death of an Artist

Fascinated by history and want to learn about Christmas foods? Go HERE and be amazed

Have difficulty when using touchscreen? You might have zombie fingers [I do]

Wondering what’s been going on with color trends lately? Read about Sad Beige Parenting &/or enter Pantone’s 2023 Magentaverse

Interested in trying a delicious salad with warm goat cheese? Ina has the recipe [Made my own vinaigrette though]

Looking for a lighthearted movie that is reminiscent of a 90s rom-com? Watch The People We Hate At The Wedding

~ ~ • ~ ~

Sorry, Not Sorry: The One About 3 Holiday Pet Peeves That Vex Me

November 29, 2022November 29, 2022 / Ally Bean / 243 Comments

It seems to me at this time of year everyone has at least one pet peeve that vexes them. Perhaps you’ve noticed this, too.

Now that we’re officially smack dab into the season of ~~Forced Frivolity~~ ~~Rampant Consumerism~~ The Holidays, I want to tell you what vexes me the most. You’ll be pleased to know that I’ve narrowed it down to 3 pet peeves, succinctly explained below.

See if they resonate with you, my little fruitcakes, then you may share yours in the comments below. To get you started, but please don’t feel limited by, at the bottom of this post I’ve created a list of possible peeves* that do not bother me but I’ve heard about– oh. yes. I. have.

📷 ONE 📸

IF YOU SEND A HOLIDAY CARD that is a family photo or you put a family photo inside a regular holiday card, please I beg of you, tell the recipients of the holiday card who these people are. Do not say a vague “Joyeux Noël from the Jones-Beauforts” BUT instead list the individual names of the people + pets in the photo. Do not assume we’ll recognize everyone in the photo.

You do know who they are, right? So why not share that information with the rest of us?

🌲 TWO 🎄

IF YOU PUT UP A TREE to celebrate Christmas, do not overdecorate it. Less is more. There is this design concept known as negative space that, stick with me here, posits that an object is more noticeable and therefore appreciated if there is emptiness around the object.

I’m happy that you’ve invested in twinkling lights & colorful bulbs & tinsel & strands of pretty beads & personally meaningful ornaments, BUT do not cover every stinking inch of every branch on the tree so that all I see, anyone sees, is a big triangular-ish blob of shiny.

I want to see the details of your beautiful decorations, truly I do, so could you make that happen, please?

🍪 THREE 🍬

IF YOU’RE A BAKER OR CANDY MAKER, I ask of you to be forthright about what kind of sweetener you use. Some of us cannot digest artificial sweeteners while others avoid natural sugar at all costs. I don’t care how you sweeten what you make, that is not my concern, BUT for the love of all that is good, be honest about what is in the goodies.

You do understand that you can make someone sick if you lie about it, right?

~ 🔻 ~

~ 🔺 ~

* Here is a list of 10 holiday pet peeves that I’ve heard mentioned emphatically by other people:

Reciprocity regarding the exchange of Holiday cards, obligation or opportunity
Christmas music, yay or nay
Party games that involve gift exchanges
Incorrect use of the letter “s” when addressing a card or gift to an entire family
Location of outdoor holiday decorations, near the house or out in the yard creating possible obstructions/distractions for drivers
Appropriate day on which to take down the holiday tree inside your home
Use of tissue paper or shredded paper inside a gift bag, yay or nay
Hostess gift for an open house party shouldn’t be wine because you only take wine when it’s a dinner party
Holiday newsletters, yay or nay
Bow on holiday wreath goes at the top, the bottom, or the side

PLEASE NOTE: In an attempt to make our home connection to the internet reliable and faster, we’re changing our internet service provider tomorrow [Wednesday], going from coaxial cable to fiber optic cable. Fingers crossed this change goes smoothly, but if not… i~~t’s been great knowing you~~ I’ll see ‘ya when I see ‘ya.

Tea For Two: Talking About A Retirement Side Hustle + 2 Story Updates

November 1, 2022 / Ally Bean / 242 Comments

• • •

TEA FOR TWO, THAT’S ME & YOU

I’ve heard it said that most marital communication is the word *WHAT* being shouted between rooms.

I believe this to be true.

Especially now that Zen-Den, Esq., has retired, sort of.

You see, he retired from his main source of employment, a full-time job with benefits, and is now self-employed as an advisor ~~wandering around at home~~, sometimes advising his former main source of employment while other times chatting it up with new prospects.

This is called a side hustle.

I am told.

So this means, from my point of view, that He Who Has A Side Hustle is underfoot almost all day long. Like a cheerful puppy. And because he’s accustomed to ~~barking~~ talking almost all day long, he has begun to NEED to tell me things.

While we are in different rooms.

Why just the other morning he shouted something to me from the kitchen while I was in our home study.

I said *what* of course.

He then walked into the home study and told me he had a few calls to take in the morning. After that he was going to organize the tea drawer where we keep, come to find out, 12 different teas*.

So you can see that He Who Has A Side Hustle is finding productive ways to occupy himself that for the most part keep him from pestering and annoying me all day long, and allow him to believe he is a valuable part of this household.

Because he is, of course.

* Knowing that someone is going to ask, the 12 kinds of tea in the drawer are:

Ceylon Orange Pekoe
Constant Comment
Earl Grey
English Breakfast
English Teatime
Green Tea
Green Tea with Pomegranate, Raspberry & Strawberry
Irish Breakfast
Lady Grey
Oolong Tea
Peppermint
Perfect Peach

• • •

UPDATES TO STORIES

1. We named the skeleton Earl. Thanks to everyone who offered name ideas. Y’all are funny. [Original story HERE.]

2. After writing about how I accidentally acquired a bag of potato chips, Z-D was at Kroger using the U-scan. He used the barcode reader to ring up a six-pack of beer and it did, but then while placing the beer on the wonky wobbly bagging carousel he accidentally dropped the six-pack on the floor. The impact caused the metal caps on two bottles to loosen, spewing carbonated beer from the bottles.

Instead of going back to get a new six-pack, for which he paid in full, Z-D left the store with four bottles of beer. Thus he paid for something he did not get and thereby, I believe, restored balance in our relationship with Kroger. [Original story HERE.]

• • •

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

When thinking about retirement what is the first idea that pops into your mind? Does this thought make you worry or happy– or something else?

If you drink tea, hot &/or cold, how many kinds of it do you have in your home? Are you about variety or uniformity?

So what do you think, was it Kroger Karma that caused Zen-Den to drop that beer, making us whole with them again?

• • 💚 • •

The Tale Of The Accidentally Purloined Bag Of Potato Chips

October 18, 2022 / Ally Bean / 248 Comments

LIKE MISCREANTS EVERYWHERE I’M GOING to say this wasn’t my fault because, as I will explain below, it was an accident.

Nothing pre-meditated about this.

Just a minor tussle involving a fast-moving me and a fussy computer in the U-scan checkout lane in the grocery store that lead to an unanticipated situation.

You see…

It was late afternoon and I was using the U-scan checkout lane in Kroger. I like the self-checkout lane because it’s usually faster than waiting in line for the traditional checkout.

Plus, and I’m bragging here, I am very good at finding the little UPC codes on what I’m buying, expertly swiping the code across the flat UPC barcode reading screen, then tossing my purchase into the reusable bags I swear by.

• • •

HOWEVER ON THIS PARTICULAR DAY in my zeal for checking out of the store, while grabbing a bag of potato chips out of my shopping cart, I twisted around in such a way that my crossbody purse did a little flying leap away from my body and landed on the flat UPC barcode reading screen.

PLOP!

Then for reasons known only to the computer, it immediately jumped ahead to the part of the transaction that asks you how you’re going to pay for these items.

But I wasn’t finished inputing all my items.

So being tired and in a hurry, without thinking much about it, I laid the bag of potato chips, not properly swiped, on top of the stuff already packed in my reusable bag.

Then I focused my energies on coaxing the computer, Little Miss Touchy Screen, to allow me to continue shopping. I was victorious, because I know all about that ⬅️ key that lets you keep buying stuff.

I input a few more items, the rest of what I wanted to buy, then paid for my purchases using a credit card, grabbed my bags, and walked to my car where I placed the bags in the trunk.

I drove home.

• • •

BUT AS I DID SO I had a slow realization, the sort that sneaks up on you in the most unlikely places, like at a stoplight while you’re waiting for it to turn green, that it was possible I had accidentally stolen that bag of potato chips, a small bag I assure you, from Kroger.

And you know what? When I got home I checked my register receipt and well… yep I stole a bag of potato chips… like a thief… a perp… which I am not… except maybe I was.

And here’s the thing because all perps have a thing, if interrogated by the Coppers I’m gonna squeal on my accomplice in this unfortunate situation. IT WAS THAT DARNED COMPUTER’S FAULT for getting flustered.

I mean what kind of wuss is that thing? It wasn’t like I hit it with the heft of a heavy leather Hermès Birkin Bag, now was it? It was only a lightweight nylon baggallini Uptown Bagg, a sleek crossbody.

Honestly, I didn’t mean to do this.

You believe me, right?

~ ~ 🛒 ~ ~