Humor

July Reply: Answering YOUR Questions About Blogging [AMA Part 1 Of 3]

/ Ally Bean / 185 Comments

INTRODUCTION

This is the longest blog post I’ve written for this blog.

On the one hand this goes against my established blogging ethos: keep it snappy, keep it short.  BUT on the other hand, and this is the point I’m attempting to make, I appreciate the questions that you, the Cool Kids, asked me a few weeks ago on my June AMA post.

I want to answer them truthfully so I got wordy.

ALSO, and perhaps you picked up on this, my ulterior motive for soliciting your AMA questions wasn’t to give me a way to yada-yada-yada about myself more [Lord knows I’ve done that enough over the years], it was/is so that I have a smooth way to introduce you to each other.

Yep, that’s what I’m doing here.

You see, many new bloggers have found The Spectacled Bean in the last year and I wanted to create a way in which I could politely introduce y’all to each other: old-timers meet newbies, new-timers meet oldbies.

That sort of thing.

Thus by highlighting who asked each question and adding a link to their blog I am doing that, hoping to create and extend a sense of community that is, in my experience, the backbone of personal blogging.

But wait, there’s more.

In addition, as a way of visually breaking up this long post, I’ve added a few photos of TV show characters whose attitude, I believe, is representative of what it takes to be a well-rounded successful personal blogger.

See if you agree.

YOUR QUESTION + MY ANSWERS

The following questions, occasionally edited for clarity, are listed alphabetically using the first letter of the first name of the Cool Kid who asked the question. Thanks to everyone who asked a question. My answers immediately follow each question.   

🔹 Annika Perry from Annika Perry asks: Friendships formed here are very much part of the heart of blogging. In which ways are your friendships formed here similar and/or different to those in person?

MY ANSWER: My friendships in the blogosphere are based on kindred creative spirits who like to think about life and laugh often. My friendships in real life are based more on shared experiences and living geographically close to each other.

🔹 Christie Hawkes from So what? Now what? asks: As for my questions, when you first started blogging, did you intentionally set out to build your tribe of cool kids or did it happen more organically? Besides the effort that goes into reading and responding to comments, what else surprised you about blogging?

MY ANSWER: I didn’t set out to create a tribe of Cool Kids. It happened organically over time as more readers found my blog and jumped into the comment section. And that is the my biggest surprise about blogging: people are more than willing to chat about stuff IF you give them a nonjudgmental + fun online place to do so.

🔹 Donna Connolly from RETIREMENT REFLECTIONS asks: What is your biggest pet peeve about blog comments?

MY ANSWER: My biggest pet peeve is the way in which WordPress arbitrarily tosses some comments into moderation, or worse spam, when I’ve not put someone into moderation or marked someone as spam. Some long-time commenters are always sent into moderation and I don’t know why. Flip side, some never-commented-here-before commenters are sent straight through the system without being approved by me. It’s wacky.

🔹 E.A. Wickham from bleuwater asks: My questions are when did you start blogging and why? How has your blog changed through the years?

MY ANSWER: I started blogging in 2004 because I was curious to see what blogs were about. Early on had various blogs that I now refer to as my starter blogs. As a personal blogger I’ve morphed from a diarist, jibber-jabber-ing daily, to what I think of as a weekly newspaper lifestyle columnist, talking about my life, eclectic topics of interest, and what makes people tick.

Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation: OPTIMISTIC

🔹 Eilene Lyon from Myricopia asks: How does one go about creating a meme? Bear in mind this question comes from someone who couldn’t figure out how to use Canva.

MY ANSWER: I don’t have a good answer to your question because I’ve never made a meme. I just stumble over memes online. That being said I do use Canva to make pretty images with quotes, so even though you mention that you “couldn’t figure out how to use Canva” I went there to learn about memes.

I discovered THIS seemingly straightforward how-to guide for making memes. A weak answer to your question, but it’s all I’ve got.

🔹 Endless Weekend from The Endless Weekend asks: Is it mostly spam that ends up being “commented” on older posts? Is that the reason you close comments after a few weeks? Why is it that you close comments on older (and still interesting!) posts?

MY ANSWER: It got to a point where I was overwhelmed with spam on older posts, so to save my sanity I decided to close them. BUT the reality is that many people still comment on previously closed posts. They do so in any current post’s comment section, meaning that the conversation continues– and the spammers can suck it.

🔹 Esoterica from Existential Ergonomics asks: I’m curious about your thoughts about bridging the changing *you* across a decade plus of blogging.

MY ANSWER: In the process of writing a personal blog for almost two decades I realize that I’ve evolved into a more generous mellower soul, more open-minded, more precise with my word choices, and just happy to goof off here without any particular goal in mind.

🔹 Jennifer Stone from Still Bitchy After 60 asks: So how do you manage to make all your comments so genuine?

MY ANSWER: In truth I am curious about what people have to say so my interest is genuine. However I’ll admit that when I started blogging I was awful at comments: often what I meant to say and what I said were 180º opposite.

Thus I researched how to reply to comments. I learned that comment replies should: 1) mirror the length of the comment you’re replying to; 2) focus on all aspects of what the commenter said; and 3) be chatty not stilted & pedantic.

Clara Oswald from Dr Who: CURIOUS

🔹 Julia Preston from Voices in My Head asks: What the heck is AMA? 🤔

MY ANSWER: Mea culpa for not explaining that AMA stands for Ask Me Anything.  It’s lingo from Reddit.

🔹 Kendra Purtell from An Audience of One [rhetorically] asks: How do you NOT respond when someone is kind enough to not only read your post, but also leave a thoughtful comment?

MY ANSWER: I don’t get it either. I consider every comment a gift and I want to say *thank you* in the only way I can which is to reply to the comment. But not everyone thinks like I/we do.

🔹 Marian Beaman from PLAIN And Fancy asks: Does your husband read your blog posts? replies in the comment section?

MY ANSWER: My husband reads my blog. When he was working in a downtown office he’d comment on my posts in the comment section, BUT now that he’s at home he comments by telling me in person what he thinks.

🔹 Marie A Bailey from 1 Write Way asks: How often do people suggest that you should “monetize” your blog since you have created such an engaging community?

MY ANSWER: Occasionally I’ll get an email from a company that wants to form a brand alliance and have me write posts about their products or services. I politely say “no.” I write this blog for snorts and giggles, to keep my brain clicking and my heart open, so to use it for profit seems ill-considered to me.

🔹 Michelle Goggins from MG Doodle Studio asks: Do you have any other blogging etiquette advice?

MY ANSWER: I’m not sure that I do. Maybe remind people to check their spelling? Or make sure your links work? Or make your blog look pretty so people enjoy seeing it? That’s what comes to mind. Is that etiquette or just common sense?

Karen Walker from Will & Grace: AMUSED

🔹 NGS from The Time for Change asks: Do people ever reference things to you from your blog from a long time ago that you’ve completely forgotten about? How has your personal view on blogging changed over the years? The role of your blog in your life? Do you have any regrets about something you’ve posted/not posted?

MY ANSWER: Yes, people occasionally remember things I wrote about that I’d forgotten I wrote about and that’s trippy. My personal view of blogging has remained consistent over the years: blogging is a great way to communicate, feel understood, learn things, and LAUGH.

As for regrets, I know I’ve written posts that sounded meaner or loopier than I meant them to be, but I don’t regret it. You learn by doing when it comes to personal blogging. It’s all about being vulnerable, figuring out what works or not, then moving forward gracefully.

🔹 Nicole MacPherson from GIRL in a BOY HOUSE asks: Is there a TYPE of blog you like the best? Are there certain blogs that you favour for certain reasons?

MY ANSWER: I don’t lean into a specific niche of blogs. What I like to read, and this is incredibly subjective, is a blog written by someone who seems to have an authentic, slightly off-the-wall, personality. As long as the person doesn’t write anything crude or vile or inflammatory, I don’t care about their topics as much as the overall vibe of the blog.

🔹 Patty Moore Wilson from WEDNESDAY’S CHILD asks: I didn’t know I could close comments after a certain time!!! So… how do I do that?

MY ANSWER: In my version of WP you go to Settings, then Discussion, then Other comment settings, to “Automatically close comments on posts older than [you fill-in the number] days”

Once you do that you have to scroll down the page and hit Save Changes and then you’re all set. You can change the number of days anytime you want so it’s not like you’ve locked into it forever.

🔹 Pete Springer from Pete Springer asks: What do you do when working with a fellow blogger who wants to do a dual or guest post but isn’t communicative about when the post might come out?

MY ANSWER: Good question but I don’t really know. The bloggers I’ve worked with have been organized and precise about when something will be published. My only thought, an obvious one, is that you could try sending an urgent email asking for the “when” but this is personal blogging, not a work setting, so I don’t think you have much leverage.

Penny from The Big Bang Theory: DETERMINED

🔹 Rae Cod from RAE COD’S WRITING asks: I have you pegged as an epic time manager, capable of keeping up with all your blog comments… how long (on average) does it take?

MY ANSWER: I’ve never timed myself when it comes to replying to comments left on this blog. I pop in and out of blogland randomly during the day so I’m not sure.

That being said, let’s say I get 100 comments and it takes me 3 minutes to reply to each one: 300 minutes = 5 hours. On the one hand that’s a lot of time but it’s not all at once and it is at my own pace, so it seems like fun.

🔹 Shelley from Quaint Revival asks: Do you have a title in mind for a blog post Before or After you write the blog post and why? What inspires your clever titles? Do you write a post all in one setting or over a period of time in between your posts? What is one lesson for newbie bloggers to learn that you wish you had known at the beginning of your blogging experience?

MY ANSWER: I rarely have a blog title in mind when I start writing blog posts, they come to me in the process of writing. I write one blog post over many days, often in dribs and drabs, as time permits and inspiration finds me.

As a newbie I wish I’d understood that LESS IS MORE. Early on I drove myself batty posting daily, often long wordy posts, because I thought I was supposed to do that. But I learned otherwise and scaled back to a  weekly-ish schedule. Readers seem to respond positively to less from me, than to more from me.

That’s the lesson. 🙄

🔹 Suzanne from LIFE OF A DOCTOR’S WIFE asks: How many people in offline-life know that you blog? And do you ever get together with people you know from blogging (and nowhere else)? And do you ever get recognized in the wild? (Difficult, I know, without photos… but I feel like it COULD happen.)

MY ANSWER: Anyone who pays any attention to me in real life should know that I write a personal blog, having done so for almost 20 years now. My blog has never been a secret.

I’ve never gotten together with other bloggers. If they exist in the wild around here I don’t know who they are and obviously they don’t know who I am either. Or they know I’m here and just haven’t included me. That’s a possibility too.

🔹 Wynne Leon from Surprised By Joy asks: If answering comments wasn’t what you expected when you started blogging – what did you expect? And has what it has turned out to be better, worse, or just different?

MY ANSWER: I expected personal blogging to be small and more tight-knit than it is. I thought it’d be like efficiently sending a fast email to a few friends and family, just doing it publicly so that everyone could read it in the same place, then reply underneath. What I envisioned is what FB, that arrived on the scene a few years after I started blogging, turned out to be.

For me personal blogging has been much bigger and more far-flung; it’s better than what I thought it’d be. I live in the midwest USA yet connect with people around the world via their blogs, their interests, their lifestyles. It’s all good– and endlessly compelling.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Next week I’ll be back answering more questions, this time about who I am [HERE]. Then the following week I’ll conclude this AMA Extravaganza with a post comprised of your miscellaneous questions [HERE].

In the meantime, may I suggest that you take a peek at some of the bloggers who asked questions here. Who knows, you may make some new bloggy friends.

The Noisy Week That Was: Of Lost Blogging Mojo & Exterior Home Improvements

/ Ally Bean / 208 Comments

As I sat down to edit this rare Sunday blog post I couldn’t help but smile and remember that I’d forgotten that I used to have a sign on my desk that said: EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED.

Good advice, very pithy. Spot on, even.

~ ~ • ~ ~

LAST WEEK SLIDE THROUGH MY HANDS, like a slippery rubber ducky in a steamy bubble bath. I lost track of the day of the week and a sense of purpose– and sadly one of my favorite lavender-colored cotton t-shirts that I think accidentally got sent to Goodwill.

[Hope someone enjoys it.]

You see, it was noisy around here in the neighborhood and when life gets noisy, I shut down. I don’t find noise energizing and instantly lose my writing/blogging/commenting mojo because I can’t think straight enough to form sentences.

My mind goes into *whatever* mode while my actions go into *sloth* mode. As for my spirit, I’ve no idea where it hides when it gets noisy.

The poor beleaguered dear.

THE FIRST PART OF THE WEEK was filled with predictable noise, fireworks & gunfire to celebrate the Fourth of July. Of course it being a long weekend the kapows and booms started on Friday night [June 30] and continued through Tuesday night [July 4].

Not a constant noise, mind you, just random loud cacophonies that set my teeth on edge, worrying me greatly.

And instantly put my central nervous system on high alert.

THEN UNEXPECTEDLY ON WEDNESDAY MORNING AT 7:00 a.m., just when I was grooving on quietude, the phone rang. It was the exterior home improvement company we contracted with in the spring to do exterior home improvements in August.

August, people. August.

And what did these fine folks have to say? They politely announced that they’d be at the house today [July 5] at 7:30 a.m. to start our projects because they were ready to do our work. Huzzah, huzzah!

This is good.

I am not complaining because that would be wrong.

BUT IT DOES MEAN THAT STARTING Wednesday I began dealing with more outside racket in the form of [hammer] NOISE & workers and [sawing] NOISE & clutter. Plus, to his credit, Zen-Den continued doing exactly what he planned to do during the week.

Yes, Zen-Den started organizing and painting the inside of the garage which is wonderful. I appreciate this project and have wanted it done for years, but it does add to the mess that I find everywhere outside any door I open when I attempt to leave the house.

And quite frankly in my estimation visual mess is a cousin of noise, on its father’s side of course.

ANYHOW HERE ARE A FEW PHOTOS of what’s going on around here. The home improvement repairs are focused on the screened-in porch, boxed bay window, and the entryway around the front door. Then, of course, the whole exterior of the house will need to be painted.

But that’s a nightmare project for another time.

So having unburdened myself with the foregoing insight into home ownership, midwest-style, I promise that once the exterior repairs are finished [or there’s less pounding], probably later this week but maybe not, I’ll get it together and write what I’m calling my July Reply series in which I answer your AMA questions.

It’s going to be three long posts because you, my little sunbeams of good cheer, ask many questions.

And for that I love you!

~ ~ • ~ ~

Ladders in front yard, awaiting their turns to be useful

~ • ~

Ladders leaning against screened-in porch, work in progress

~ • ~

Trash formerly known as the screened-in porch exterior

~ • ~

New exterior panels on one side of screened-in porch, trim being added

~ • ~

Assorted garage stuff piled up out of the way whilst one part of the garage is being painted, forsooth

~ • ~

Ladder in garage used by husband whilst painting the walls Sherwin-Williams Pure White

~ • ~

Trailer parked in driveway making it impossible to get car into garage BUT featuring a cute orange cone

~ ~ • ~ ~

Of Cool Kids & Comments: 2 FAQ Answered. Got More Questions?

/ Ally Bean / 224 Comments

Here is why you are the cool kids  

It’s my takeaway from one of the nicest compliments I’ve received on this blog. A long time ago a blogger told me I was one of the Cool Kids a la high school.

She explained that I wasn’t one of the Popular Kids, like the jocks with their toadies or the mean girls with their wannabes. Nor was I one of the obedient Do Bees who followed all the rules.

Instead she said that I was one of the Cool Kids, a quiet rebel, sitting in the back of the class, amused by what I saw going on, able to do my own thing with my friends.

I was flattered by what she said. It jived with my perception of who I am so I decided that: 1) if you comment here you are my friend;  and 2) as such that makes you a Cool Kid, too.

~ • ~

~ • ~

This is how I deal with comments

First of all I’m grateful to receive as many comments as I do. Cool Kids are the best. Thank you.

That being said, as many of you have noted, it does take some doing on my part to keep up with all the comments. I’ll admit this isn’t what I anticipated when I started blogging, yet I want to be friendly and conscientious because that’s the kind of blogger I am.

You understand.

Thus my approach to my comment section is to:

  • only post on days when I know I’ll have the flexibility to reply to comments as they come in;
  • check comments frequently, but not obsessively, on the first few days after I post; and
  • close comments on every post after about three weeks.

In other words, in a nutshell, I don’t turn my back on my comment section lest I be swept under and overwhelmed about replying to them.

[Also for those who are interested, HERE is something I wrote about blog comments a few years ago. The post received 388 comments. 🙄]

~ • ~

~ • ~

Do you have more questions for me?

It’s been a long time since I asked for your questions. I’ve no specific reason why I haven’t done an AMA post recently, just no planning on my part, I guess.

So to correct this lapse and to keep things fresh & different around here, I’m asking you to leave me some questions in the comment section of this post. The questions can be about blogging or me or seeking advice for a problem.

Anything that you’re curious about.

Then starting in July, in a different post [or posts], I’ll answer your questions to the best of my ability which is to say I reserve the right to not answer any questions that I deem unreasonable.

In my answers I’ll make sure to mention you and your blog, adding a link to your blog of course so that the Cool Kids can find you.

How’s that for an incentive to ask me a question!

A Glimpse Into My Heart: Books I’ve Reread + Reader Comments About Randomness

/ Ally Bean / 231 Comments

The quote above is attributed to Francois Mauriac, French author and winner of the 1952 Nobel Peace Prize for Literature. I didn’t know a thing about this man until I researched him, btw.

If we are to believe in Mauriac’s idea, one that I have never thought about before, then it follows that by sharing which novels I’ve reread I’m letting you know who I am.

Heart-wise, that is.

However before I tell you which books I’ve reread I’m going to insert 3 provisos, lest I be misunderstood:

✅ I know that some people never reread anything, but I do reread novels. Never non-fiction though, except that I reread cookbooks which are technically non-fiction so maybe I don’t know what I’m saying here.

✅ I know that some people who read novels then see a movie based on the novel consider that like reading a book for a second time. I am not one of those people: books are books, movies are movies. They are different animals.

✅ I know that technically rereading children’s stories to a child is rereading, but I believe that doing that is not in the spirit of this exercise so I haven’t included any of those books here.

Thus, without further ado, presented in alphabetical order, here are 9 books I’ve reread as an adult:

Alice in Wonderland* by Lewis Carroll

Chocolat by Joanne Harris

Even Cowgirls Get the Blues by Tom Robbins

I Capture the Castle* by Dodie Smith

Jane Eyre* by Charlotte Brontë

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

The Screwtape Letters* by C.S. Lewis

Winnie-the-Pooh* by A.A. Milne

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance* by Robert M. Pirsig

* Books on my list with an asterisk are ones included in Books Really Worth Re-Reading, a Goodreads list of 753 books.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Do you ever reread books? Why or why not?

Now that I’ve revealed which books I’ve read more than once, do you feel like you’ve gotten a glimpse into my heart? OR do you think Mauriac’s idea is dubious at best?

What say you about “lame one-liner reviews” currently popular on the back covers of novels?

What book are you currently reading? Is this the first time you read it OR are you rereading it?

AND FINALLY FOUR READER COMMENTS…

About something RANDOM in your daily life:

“… there is plenty of ‘random’ in my life…. looking for things because no one ever puts anything back where it goes. (How can so many pairs of scissors possibly disappear?!?)… I’ll spend next Tuesday morning hanging small bars of soap in young peach trees to serves as deer repellent.”

~ Linda Lou

“I stopped for iced coffee from Bad Ass Coffee today. They use coffee to make their ice cubes, which tastes good, of course, but makes me happy beyond practical reasoning!”

~ Christie Hawkes

“Currently, I am on peony watch – looking out the back window all day. The older peony has already flowered and dropped all it’s petals. The newer peony (which is my favorite; don’t tell the other one) is so close to blooming that I can’t stand it.”

~ Gigi Rambles

“As for random thoughts, I was thinking of how clean my kitchen will be once my kids move out. LOL!”

~ joyroses13