In Which We Get New Outdoor Furniture & Ally Embraces Social Media, Part 2 of 2

May 11, 2016January 25, 2024 / Ally Bean / 61 Comments

{Sub-titled: Nothing Is Ever Easy, But Darn This Furniture Is Pretty}

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YESTERDAY ON AS THE ~~WORLD~~ BEAN TURNS…

We left the Beans longing for Carton 2 of 6, unable to determine where it was, or when it might appear at the house.

What will happen next?

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THURSDAY, Day 12 – After posting the above tweet the night before, Ally receives helpful early morning tweet from reputable catalog company asking her to phone them. This pleases Ally, but being an introvert she passes message on to husband to deal with.

Around 11:00 a.m. Ally, sitting in her home office, hears thunk of carton as someone drops off Carton 2 of 6 by the garage door.

No one appears at front door, so no one signs for anything.

FRIDAY, Day 13 – Ally, who had the audacity to leave her house, returns home to find a message on the answering machine from Important Office Guy at reputable catalog company. He is apologizing for the delay and explaining how on the following Monday she’ll receive the cushions lost in transit.

Except the cushions are no longer lost.

Again, Ally the introvert, forces Zen-Den, Esq., to deal with this. And he does, calling Important Office Guy to tell him that all is well here.

We. Are. Happy.

This would be the end of it all, or so you would hope…

WEDNESDAY, Day 18 – Around 8:00 a.m. Ally receives phone call from Worried Manager Guy of the third-party delivery service. He needs her to sign for Carton 2 of 6. Without her signature, reputable catalog company will not pay third-party delivery service.

This situation does not make Worried Manager Guy happy. He asks if one of his drivers could come by the house at 11:00 a.m. for her to sign for Carton 2 of 6.

Ally, who can’t think of a reason why not, figures that’d be ok.

At 8:50 a.m. the doorbell rings and Ally finds Truck Guy from third-party delivery service standing on her stoop, proving that when it behooves them, third-party delivery service can find her home lickety-split.

Truck Guy has packing slip [sans clipboard] + pen for Ally to use to sign piece of paper that confirms Ally did, in the end, after 18 days of messing around with reputable catalog company, and their chosen third-party delivery service, get all of her pretty wicker furniture with cushions.

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THUS ENDETH THE STORY.

Unless, of course, someone realizes that no one signed for the ottoman and cushion, in which case, there will be a sequel to this story.

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In Which We Get New Outdoor Furniture & Ally Embraces Social Media, Part 1 of 2

May 10, 2016January 25, 2024 / Ally Bean / 36 Comments

{Sub-titled: Nothing Is Ever Easy, But Darn This Furniture Is Pretty}

SUNDAY, Day 1 – The Beans place an online order with a reputable catalog company for a wicker furniture set, consisting of 1 loveseat with cushions + 2 lounge chairs with cushions. They also order an ottoman with cushion.

TUESDAY, Day 3 – The happy duo receives a phone call from reputable catalog company, and agree that Ally will be home on Friday morning to take delivery of wicker furniture with cushions because someone must sign for these items.

WEDNESDAY, Day 4 – Ottoman with cushion is dumped on stoop by front door of home in late afternoon.

No one signs for anything.

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FRIDAY, Day 6 – Ally waits at home for wicker furniture with cushions to be delivered by third-party delivery service.

Truck Man shows up on time, but is confused by all the gibberish on the cartons:

factory-printed name of product different from reputable catalog company name for furniture;
arbitrary hand-written markings scribbled hither and yon; +
multiple official shipping labels.

Ally is also confused by this mess.

Together, over the course of an hour, Ally and Truck Man determine that 5 of her 6 cartons of wicker furniture with cushions are here.

Truck Man talks with Guy On Dock who admits that Carton 2 of 6, which contains cushions for one lounge chair, is sitting in front of him, and that it’ll be delivered to house that afternoon.

Ally must wait to sign for it.

SATURDAY, Day 7 – Ally, who waited but did not receive Carton 2 of 6, tells husband, Zen-Den, Esq., to call reputable catalog company. He does so and is told to expect Monday delivery of Carton 2 of 6.

MONDAY, Day 9 – Carton 2 of 6 does not arrive at house, although Ally is at home all day ready to sign for it.

TUESDAY, Day 10 – Z-D again calls reputable catalog company, and speaks with someone who says that on Wednesday Guy On Dock will call him back with a Carton 2 of 6 location update.

WEDNESDAY, Day 11 – Z-D doesn’t get a phone call, Carton 2 of 6 does not arrive at house, so Ally, tired of waiting around the house, takes matters into her own hands. Which is to say she uses social media to get some attention from reputable catalog company.

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What will happen next? Will Ally and Zen-Den get their last two cushions from reputable catalog company?

And if so, how will it happen?

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TUNE IN TOMORROW TO FIND OUT HERE ON:

AS THE ~~WORLD~~ BEAN TURNS.

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My Reflections On The 2016 A To Z Challenge: The Outtakes

May 3, 2016August 29, 2024 / Ally Bean / 69 Comments

• Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit, I finished the 2016 A To Z Challenge. I know a few of you wondered about my ability to do this challenge, if I’d flake, and I have to say bless your little pea-pickin’ hearts for being worried about me.

But you see, my gentle readers, this challenge did not, in the end, upset the apple cart for me. I finished this challenge because I used my noodle to make sure that I didn’t end up in a pickle while doing it.

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• Sure, some days the constraints of the challenge griped my grits; but even though my writing process is slower than molasses, I did not allow that hard cheese to stop me from publishing each post.

I’ll admit that some of the things I wrote were about as sharp as a wet cornflake, which might have made me appear to be a few fries short of a happy meal.

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• However, throughout the challenge, even though I didn’t consider it easy as pie, I remained cool as a cucumber and didn’t stumble ass over teakettle in the process.

While I’d never say that I was a huckleberry above a persimmon, I did finish the challenge, and came to the same conclusion that Snoopy, my spirit animal, observed years ago: “It’s amazing how many friends you have after your waffle iron gets fixed.”

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THESE LAST 15 FOOD SAYINGS, THAT DIDN’T MAKE THE CHALLENGE CUT, ARE DEFINED IN THE COMMENTS BELOW.

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Z Is For Zwieback, A Good Way To End

April 30, 2016May 6, 2021 / Ally Bean / 50 Comments

“You can’t dunk your zwieback in your Bosco.”

~ Radar O’Reilly, M*A*S*H

This quote, which is from an episode of M*A*S*H, refers to the uncomfortable feeling you have around someone who is more uptight + judgmental than you are.

Radar said it to Hawkeye in a literal way, referring to Colonel Potter, but over time this quote has come to be an idiom meaning that you’re not relaxed and confident around someone else because you’re afraid that you’ll do something wrong.

And get in trouble or be judged for it.

I’ve heard people in real life say this quote. It’s clever, and it does show you how language + meaning evolve in the most unpredictable ways.

Which, now that I think about it, might the subtext of my FOOD: Talking The Talk theme. That is, all the words I’ve picked here have morphed, for reasons varied, into meaning something more than their literal definitions, which for me, a wordsmith + foodie, is worthy of note.

And it is a perfect thought on which to end this 2016 A To Z Challenge.

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Thanks everyone for stopping by to read and comment. I appreciate you taking the time to be here as I did something I wasn’t sure that I could do. I guess, after all my doubts, my challenge turned out to be better, rather than worse.

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PLEASE NOTE: next week I’ll reflect upon this blogging adventure, using the sayings that didn’t make the cut. You’re going to like it. 😉

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