I’m Just Saying

Don’t Let The Seeds Stop You: 6 Random Things To Tell You On A Tuesday In March

/ Ally Bean / 216 Comments

1 – I am editing. After reading about the Zombie Test for writing I latched onto the idea. The test, created by Rebecca Johnson deputy director of the Marine Corps War College, is a rule of thumb that helps you discern if you’re writing in the passive voice. All you do is: “Try adding by zombies after the verb in your sentence. If it makes sense, congratulations! You’ve probably got yourself some passive voice.”

2 – I am laughing. So you know how everyone seems to want to stereotype other people by their generations? Well this snarky article, An Updated Guide To Generations, explains how to do this. I’ll just go ahead and tell you that I feel at home in this stereotype: “Maybe Boomers: Gen Xers who type on their phones using a single pointer finger.” Mock me as you will.

3 – I am communicating. I recently stumbled over the simple idea that there are three ways you can reply when someone tells you something about themself. You need to discern if this person is looking to be hugged, to be heard, or to be helped. If your response is what they expect, then you’ll easily connect. Never thought about interpersonal communication in this way, but now that I have I like it.

4 – I am dubious. On my radar is 25 Front Door Color Meanings Revealing the Personality of Your Home, an article that purports to intuit the personality of your home by noting your front door color. While I’m all about expressing yourself, I don’t believe front door color alone says much. It’s just one variable that contributes to the overall look of your property, so don’t get too hung up on it.

5 – I am remembering. This is the “do it now” Lockdown Manifesto written by Julian Hanna and published on April 17, 2020. It influenced me, in a positive way, about how I’d face the pandemic. Going back to re-read it five years later I am struck by two things: 1) it’s great timeless advice; and 2) we were so innocent about how Covid-19 would upend our lives forever.

6 – I am exploring. After a conversation with a friend about what it means to say you’re curious, I found this Britannica “Discovery Your Curiosity Type” Quiz. To be clear I wasn’t looking for a quiz, I was looking for a definition of the concept of curiosity, but the quiz popped up in my research. I took it, learning that of the 4 curiosity types I am an intuitive discoverer aka Explorer.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Assuming you don’t want to write in the passive voice, will you be utilizing the Zombie Test to make sure your voice is active?

Do you need to be hugged, heard, or helped today?

What color is your front door? What, if anything, does it say about your house?

Which kind of curiosity type are you? Did you take the quiz or are you guessing?

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I’m Pleased To Announce That Miss Nettie Briggs Has Entered The Chat

/ Ally Bean / 217 Comments

Give attitude, get attention, right?

I like that saying, it explains many things.

I prefer, and I think you’d agree, that the attitude be positive spunk [aka signal] rather than negative junk [aka noise], BUT the result is the same: the attention is on you.

Not that giving attitude is anything new.

In fact back when the world was a more genteel place free from 24/7 news and social media, I’m sure people gave attitude— just in more subtle ways. They may have been irritated by events and other people, but seemingly they tolerated that irritation with more grace than today*.

Case in point is Miss Nettie Briggs. She is featured in the professional portrait seen at the top of this post. She is looking placid, mildly amused by what she is doing.

Or so it seems to me.

I found this photo mixed in among the boxes of family photos that I sorted last summer and wrote about in Confessions Of A Reluctant Family Historian: My Kingdom For A Shredder, my most popular post of 2024. [Go figure?]

I don’t know for sure who Miss Nettie Briggs was: my mother had written her name on the back of the photo so she knew who she was. But there’s no one left from any generation that’d be able to tell me Miss Nettie Briggs’s story.

However I have an inkling of who she might have been.

I remember my mother talking about a nurse who came to live with her family for a year, tasked with looking after my mother’s older sister who’d had abdominal surgery. Something that at the time was a dangerous procedure that required months of bedrest in order to heal.

Nettie lived with them and when not looking after her charge, who slept a lot, she read books to and played games with my mother and her younger sister.

Mom liked Miss Nettie Briggs, as I recall. Enough, I would guess, to keep a photo of Miss Nettie Briggs around in a ratty cardboard box full of dusty old family photos for me to find one day.

I adore Miss Nettie Briggs because I find her charming.

Thus it has come to be that Nettie’s photo is now framed and hanging on the wall in our study where I do my blogging, old-school style on a desktop computer.

Meaning that whenever I do anything related to blogging Nettie is looking over my shoulder, keeping my thoughts mostly civil, my sense of humor firmly intact, and my vibe jovial enough.

At least most days.

Questions of the Day

What’s your attitude today? Are you receiving the kind of attention you want?  
Do you have any old family photos of somebody who is a mystery to you? 
Do you have any old or new photos of people framed and hanging on your walls? Once upon a time that was frowned upon you know!

• 🤎 •

* Last month in various places online I, a kind-hearted person, was criticized for:

  • watching TV shows rather than reading books
  • suggesting that not all men are worthy of adoration
  • noting the demographics of people who got in my way
  • proposing that not all old things are worth saving
  • not obsessing constantly about The Donald and his First Buddy

A Chance Encounter In The Cereal Aisle, An Unexpected Act Of Probably Legal Kindness

/ Ally Bean / 219 Comments

Something weird happened. Please allow me to explain.

A few weeks ago on a Sunday afternoon Zen-Den and I were shopping in Kroger. It was busy but not chaotic, for the most part shoppers were aware of each other. In fact the biggest annoyances were the extra temporary displays clogging the aisles.

Thus it was a slow process going up and down the aisles, but we weren’t in a hurry so we moseyed happily along, Z-D pushing the cart, me following behind him.

In the cereal aisle we came to a full stop when we encountered a couple in their 70s who were looking for one particular cereal. They’d abandoned their cart in the middle of the aisle and, with paper coupon in hand, were laser-focused on finding the right cereal on the shelf, wherever it might be.

We just smiled and waited.

Eventually they found their cereal and looked up to see us standing there, unperturbed. The woman, who was wearing a sweatshirt that said “You Are Enough,”  apologized to us for holding up traffic.

No problem say we and go on our way continuing to shop.

• • •

Eventually we got what we needed and went to stand in line to use the U-scan machines. After a few minutes we scored a machine and went to it.

Doing our usual grocery shopping two-step, I handed the items to Z-D. He then scanned and bagged them.

Welp, while we were doing this I noticed the older couple was now in line for the U-scans. Then kind of out of nowhere the “You Are Enough” sweatshirt woman walks up to Z-D, who is in the process of weighing fruit, and says: “Excuse me sir, these are for you.”

At which point she hands a surprised Zen-Den three flowers [seen in the photo at the top of this post]. He looks at me, like I should have a clue about why this is happening, but I shrug.

Beats me.

So he thanks her while taking the flowers that he then hands to me. She smiles and goes back to standing in line with her husband by their cart of unpaid for groceries and a bouquet of flowers.

We finish checking out, pay for our stuff, and walk out of the store with me holding what was TECHNICALLY, from a strictly legal perspective was probably, STOLEN MERCHANDISE because at that minute while we walked to our car the flowers hadn’t been purchased by the older couple who was still standing in line waiting to buy them.

I hope.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Do you believe this was a weird experience?

Has anything like this happened to you— that is, having a stranger, who might be a little Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs, spontaneously hand you a gift?

Do you like the “You Are Enough” message on the woman’s sweatshirt? Was the Universe trying to tell us something or just playing mind games with us?

How often to you go grocery shopping? Do you prefer a certain day and/or time of day?

• • 🛒 • •

It’s Not A Mystery Why I’m Answering 10 Unique Questions

/ Ally Bean / 165 Comments

Life can sometimes be a mystery.

While it’s true that I enjoy writing stories that entertain and doing research that informs, the reality is that sometimes I don’t have anything going on in my real life that is blogworthy.

And you do realize, my little moonbeams, that I give you only the best, right?

Welp today is one of those times when my life is rolling along smoothly but I can’t think of anything to talk about. So instead of fretting about my lack of blog fodder, I decided to do the following.

See what you think.

I read THIS INTERVIEW with Kelly Hoppen in The Guardian’s Saturday The Q&A column. In this weekly column asks celebrities fun questions.

I perked up when I saw that Kelly Hoppen was an interviewee. About 10 years ago when I was first learning about interior design principles, Hoppen’s books explained many of the concepts to me.

Her words + photos made sense. Not that I’m as enamored of neutrals like she is, but I enjoyed her approach about how to create a cohesive style for your home. That’s what I needed to learn.

Anyhow as I read the interview I thought to myself, I like these questions and will take the juiciest ones to create a snazzy little blog post that is cheery and authentic.

Obviously it’s no mystery why bloggers like questions, they’re an easy way to craft a blog post by replying to someone else’s queries. In fact, should you be in search of something to write about, feel free to answer these questions on your own blog [if you have one] or pick a few to discuss in the comments below.

10 Unique Questions

1 – What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
I’m a wimp about making phone calls.

2 – What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Cruelty, whether it be physical or emotional

3 – Describe yourself in three words
I am light-hearted, truthful, and creative. [Also, because describing yourself in five words is better than doing so in three, I am organized and empathetic.]

4 – What do you most dislike about your appearance?
I have rosacea so my face looks red all the time.

5 – What is your most unappealing habit?
Involuntarily rolling my eyes at empty-headed people, especially those talking inflammatory gibberish or wearing face paint in support of a sports team

6 – If you could bring something extinct back to life, what would you choose?
The passenger pigeon, a species that went extinct in 1913 at the Cincinnati Zoo when Martha, the last one, died

7 – Who is your celebrity crush?
Natasha Lyonne [especially in Poker Face and that’s no bull shit]

8 – Which book are you ashamed not to have read?
While I’ve read Olive Kitteridge, I’ve not read any other books by Elizabeth Strout and I know that many bookish friends are crazy about her writing.

9 – What is the worst thing anyone’s said to you?
“I’m sorry we don’t sell alcohol on Sundays in this grocery store. This is a dry county, but if you want to buy some beer you can drive 20 minutes from here into the next county over where they sell alcohol on Sunday.”

10 – What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
Kindness happens, often when you least expect it, so stay open to the possibility and don’t close your heart to its existence.

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