Out raking the leaves.
Half an acre lot sloping down into a ravine with a creek.
Maybe about 28 trees on it.
[Never doubt that trees beget leaves.]
Getting tired. Getting bored.
Mind starts to offer mantras.
“I think I can… I think I can…”
Childhood wisdom gleaned from reading.
“When in doubt, don’t.”
Adult wisdom imparted by yoga teacher.
“Yes we can.”
Political slogan, uplifting.
Then the deciding factor.
While raking on the hillside, giving it my all, I slipped and fell on my backside.
Just. Like. That.
Nothing hurt. Not even my ego.
I’m a klutz* after all.
But suddenly the angels sang and I knew which mantra to follow.
DID I KEEP GOING INSPIRED TO OVERCOME or DID I MAKE A STRATEGIC RETREAT?
* Previously documented examples of my klutziness: 1) fell on face while carrying donation into Goodwill; 2) thrown off Segway while moving through cemetery; and 3) during house party dropped ottoman on toe breaking toenail.
“What’s in a name?
That which we call a rose,
By any other name would smell as sweet.”
~ Romeo and Juliet
• + • + •
The other morning I gave the shrub roses their last trim of the season. Even though the calendar says it’s fall, these bushes are officially ready for winter.
Most of the roses were faded and falling apart, but a few flowers were still buds or starting to bloom.
I saved the healthy stragglers, putting them together in a casual bouquet in a vase on the kitchen counter.
Later I noticed that the sun, shining through the window, made the water sparkle and the colors pop, leaving me with one last glimpse of summer’s beauty, while waiting for winter to arrive.
• + • + •
“Light, seeking light, doth light of light beguile;
So ere you find where light in darkness lies,
Your light grows dark by losing of your eyes.”
~ Love’s Labor’s Lost
• What do you consider is the most perfect food for you? (It can be your favorite food to something extremely healthy.)
APPLES: Natural. Sweet. Healthy. Portable. Alkaline. Reasonably priced. Easy to sauce. Nice to crisp. Wonderful to pie. Tasty to cider. Pretty to look at.
• Are you focused on today or tomorrow?
I’m usually focused on both. They are, after all, connected to each other in ways unbroken. Like the flow of the eternity symbol [figure eight on its side] my mind glides effortlessly from today to tomorrow, and then back again to today. I’m mindful of now, but with a sense of perspective about later.
• If you could interview one of your great-great-great grandparents, who would it be (if you know their name) and what would you ask?
The only great-great-great grandparent that I know of is the man who immigrated from Scotland to America. He was, supposedly, from a well-off nobleman’s family [weren’t they all?], but being a minor son with no title to inherit, he decided to come here to make his fortune.
If I could talk with him I’d ask him: why did he came here? what did he do for a living when he got here? and how did this life differ from the one he left?
• What inspired you this past week? Feel free to use a quote, a photo, a story, or even a combination.
Here’s what inspired me last week: did you know that a rainbow can happen even if it’s not raining where you are?
I didn’t, nor did Zen-Den.
On Thursday night he drove home from where he works downtown, and noticed, as he drove along, that a rainbow in the sky seemed to end at our house.
When he got home, he walked inside the house and asked me when it’d rained. I told him that it hadn’t rained here.
He said that it hadn’t rained on his drive home either… BUT there was a rainbow in the sky out front of our house now.
Of course, we both went running out the front door to see this rainbow– and by golly there it was. Large and bright and colorful.
Now how amazing is that?
~ • ~
Catch up with everyone else who is answering Cee’s Share Your World Questions this week by clicking HERE.
~ • ~
Once upon a time I was a super conscientious woman.
I lived and died by Checking Things Off My To Do List. My self-worth was contingent upon these checks because the results were more important to me than the process. Woe be it to anyone who got in my way: I was not always the nicest person.
Sad to say, apologizes offered.
~ ~ • ~ ~
~ ~ • ~ ~
Then my goals and desires began to change.
That is, I got older and more self-aware. I evolved into a wiser + wearier woman who no longer felt obliged to Do A Lot Every Day Or Else. I still accomplish things, quite a few things– but at a slower pace, focusing on the process that I now allow to be organic rather than forced.
Mellowness is good for me.
~ ~ • ~ ~
~ ~ • ~ ~
This new me is easier to be around.
Despite these unsettling difficult Trumpian times we’re living through, I’m a more relaxed version of my previous self. This iteration, Ally Bean 2.0 The Best Yet, evolved quietly during the last decade of my life when I didn’t feel well and couldn’t decide a thing without overthinking it.
However, no longer stuck am I.
~ ~ • ~ ~
~ ~ • ~ ~
I don’t know why I’m telling you this today, my gentle readers.
All I can say is that this morning as I was planning my day I realized How Differently I Handle Any Decision Or Activity now, compared to how I used to do things when society had me convinced that my self-worth hinged on my super conscientiousness.
But you know what? It doesn’t.
The title of this post explains it.
Most of the time when I write here I have something specific to *blah, blah, blah* about, but today all is well.
So instead of manufacturing a faux problem to blog about I’ll share a few photos of a pretty butterfly flitting about, with purpose and intent, on our butterfly bush.
I believe that sometimes it all comes together and the best thing to do is to appreciate it. Like I’m doing today.
~ ~ 🐝 ~ ~
MY WEEK THUS FAR HAS BEEN A DOOZY, filled with broken things, unreliable people, and inconveniently rainy weather. Nothing, despite my best efforts, has gone smoothly.
Exhausted after a trying day, I was sitting on our deck last night. I had a glass of pinot noir on the table beside me, and was minding me own beeswax, so to speak.
A bee, like the one in the photo above, came out of nowhere and flew directly, seemingly intentionally, into my glass of wine, then proceeded to do the backstroke in the wine in the glass.
As much as this sounds like I’m making up this story, I’m being literal: a large, healthy bee, managed to ruin my glass of red wine, while having himself the best swim ever.
~ ~ 🍷 ~ ~
IT WAS HILARIOUS TO WATCH HIM going around in circles inside the glass, of course. However, at the same time, it was damned annoying because the wine wasn’t a cheap bottle of plonk– and I had to toss the contents of the glass, bee and all, over the side of the deck onto the grass below.
Zen-Den, gracious human being that he is, brought me another glass of wine from the bottle in the kitchen… and he handed me a paper cocktail napkin to use to cover the top of the glass while I continued to sit on the deck.
But me being me, an English major educated and encouraged to find the meaning in all things, I got lost in my head trying to figure out what it meant that a bee got buzzed, in a most dramatic way, right when I was trying to mellow out.
~ ~ 🤔 ~ ~
THE BEST EXPLANATION I COULD COME UP WITH, based on Occam’s Razor‘s idea of simplicity + obviousness, was that the bee represented me this week, busy doing things, but not in ways that make me happy.
And that following the bee’s lead, I needed to speed up my wine consumption if I was to have as much fun and relaxation as this uninvited bee was having in my wine glass.
So, not being one to argue with Scientific Logic, or the Serendipitous Nature of the Universe, I drank my first glass of wine. Then sipped another one. And suddenly, as if it was all meant to be, everything seemed right within my world.