I WAS AT A PARTY where I ended up in a weird conversation that confused me. Generally speaking, being empathetic, I’m good at intuiting what is really being said, reading between the lines, but this time… I dunno.
Here’s what happened:
I was standing in the kitchen [no surprise, right?] talking with three pleasant women, one of whom I’d just met. The other two I’ve seen maybe 2 times in the last 10 years, so not friends– more like casual almost acquaintances that pass in the night.
What I know for sure about these woman is that they each:
- are married to the father of their children;
- have kids in college, hither and yon across the US;
- work outside the home, in different industries; and
- attend Christian churches of different denominations.
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{ source }
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ONE WOMAN WAS TALKING ABOUT how her youngest child would be out of college by the end of the year. This meant that she was to the point of thinking about leaving her full-time job. This woman wasn’t sure what she was going to do next, but it was NOT going to be what she’d been doing.
To me this seemed like a standard conversation, at least until the woman I just met said: “Well, just make sure that whatever you do it next isn’t mainstream.”
And with that the three started laughing, loudly, glancing at each other as if this was the funniest thing anyone ever said.
I was lost.
The conversation continued with them talking about how they could never be mainstream– except that they were rolling their eyes like this was an inside joke and they knew they were mainstream.
I was still lost.
As a free-spirited woman who has never been called mainstream I was clueless about what was being implied by the word mainstream, yet I knew something was up.
At this point I’d have asked clarifying questions, but we were interrupted by someone who walked into the kitchen with a story to tell– and I never got the chance. Considering these are casual acquaintances [at best], I’m not going to call one and ask what was really going on.
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{ source }
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NATURALLY I’VE BEEN WONDERING about the conversation:
🔹 Was it about how they considered themselves to be the very definition of mainstream, embracing the word as a kind of mantra, taking it to be complimentary?
OR
🔹 Was it about how they never would define themselves as mainstream, so there’s no way that one of them could ever do anything mainstream, taking it to be derogatory?
OR
🔹 Were they talking about something else in reference to mainstream, like a pop culture or political or small town allusion that I’m not familiar with, something like that maybe?
Obviously I don’t know, but this conversation has stayed on my mind, stumped by what was really going on. Thus I’m asking you, my little moonbeams of conversational clarity, for your take on this.
Help me understand, please.
~ 🔹 ~
QUESTIONS OF THE DAY
Have you ever felt like I did that you were adjacent to an inside joke?
When the word mainstream is used around you, assuming it is, how do you define it?
In your worldview does it have a positive or negative connotation? Or neutral?
Also, been to any good parties lately? Do tell
~ ~ 🥳 ~ ~
THE SPECTACLED BEAN 