Meandering Thoughts About Grittiness While Meandering Through A Bookstore

September 9, 2025 / Ally Bean / 226 Comments

✅ I WAS WANDERING AROUND Barnes & Nobles enjoying the positive vibe that comes from being around people who like books when I saw a copy of the latest book about Gwyneth Paltrow. I’d ~~read~~ skimmed a few reviews of Amy Odell’s Gwyneth: The Biography, so I knew it existed, but hadn’t seen it in the wild.

Yet there I was face-to-face with Gwyneth’s smiling face.

Or at least a portion of it.

• • •

✅ SEEING THIS BOOK sent my addled brain into overdrive.

My first thought was decidedly practical: I wonder what brand and shade of eyebrow pencil/powder Gwyneth has on. As my blonde hair has gotten grayer on its way to, I hope, silvery white, I’ve had a difficult time finding very pale blonde/light warm gray eyebrow colors.

My second thought was happily snarky: I wonder if she knows she looks like Janice on The Muppet Show? The resemblance is amazing to me. I bet Gwyneth can play an electric guitar as well as Janice.

My third thought was idly curious: I wonder what it’d be like to be a Hollywood nepo baby who’s lived your entire life with a financial safety net under you.

Not that Gwyneth hasn’t been successful, but is it because she knew she couldn’t fail, free to give her career her best shot unencumbered by the soul-sucking tedious financial realities most people face?

Is it because she’s so innately talented, filled with drive and grit that regardless of anything in her life she was destined to be a star?

• • •

✅ THIS LAST THOUGHT REMINDED ME that years ago I read psychologist Angela Duckworth’s book, Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance. According to Duckworth:

Grit is passion and perseverance for longterm goals…. Talent and luck matter to success. But talent and luck are no guarantee of grit. And in the very long run, I think grit may matter as least as much, if not more.

I remember feeling empowered and comforted by her sensible assessment of what it takes to succeed— and how grit, something I possess, plays into a person’s success.

Back when I read the book I took a free online 10-question quiz that is still available for you to take. It is the GRIT SCALE QUIZ. From my results I learned that my Grit Score is 4.20 meaning that I’m grittier than 80% of Americans.

Discussion about whether this grittiness has helped me become the swell blogger I am today is something I’ll leave for another time.

• • •

✅ I DIDN’T PICK UP the book about Paltrow because, as you my little chickadees can probably guess, my interest in biographies of Hollywood stars is nonexistent.

Do. not. care.

But seeing it did remind me that I was in this store to buy a book and that if I was going to read a book about a real person I’d best mosey meself to the memoir section of the store where I could find books that are presumably truthful, blessedly idiosyncratic, and often inspiring.

That’s what interests me.

Thus I ended up buying and enjoying Peggy Orenstein’s funny thoughtful pandemic memoir, Unraveling: What I Learned About Life While Shearing Sheep, Dyeing Wool, and Making the World’s Ugliest Sweater.

Which, as fate would have it, also had a compelling up-close photo of a face on the front cover.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Do you enjoy shopping for books in a brick and mortar store? If so, do you meander around like I do enjoying the atmosphere before purchasing anything?

Do you ever read biographies? Or memoirs?

Thinking back to where you were 5 years ago when we first started grappling with + adapting to the new Covid 19 pandemic realities, what did you do to keep yourself sane, assuming you stayed sane?

If you took the quiz, how gritty are you?

+ • + • +

You Are The Sunshine Of My Life: 8 Things To Tell You On A Tuesday In July

July 1, 2025 / Ally Bean / 266 Comments

I am peeved. Last week WP spontaneously published this content before I’d finished writing it. When I realized the mistake I deleted what I’d started, SWORE AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS, & started over again to write this. To say I’m not pleased with WP would be an understatement. However many thanks to everyone who received a half-finished email & let me know something was off. Bloggy friends are the best.

I am fascinated. Do you know what a “nurdle” is? I didn’t until I stumbled over this article, Why Is a Blob of Toothpaste Called a “Nurdle?” While this nonsensical term has more to do with Madison Avenue than anything medical, it was used in a 1960s toothpaste advertisement for a brand of toothpaste called Vote. The best part of this snippet of advertising history is that the tagline for this now defunct toothpaste was: “A nurdle a day keeps the dragon away.” Words to live by, people.

I am uncertain. Recently an acquaintance told me why she doesn’t like personal blogs. Over the years I’ve heard many reasons why blogs suck, but her reason surprised me. She ignores them because she says “everyone does the same thing.”

She was referring to challenges &/or prompts wherein a group of like-minded bloggers commit to sharing their takes on the same topic. She finds that boring because she perceives no originality, only conformity. I take her point, but isn’t showing up in whatever way suits you, follower or free spirit, the whole point of personal blogging?

I am entertained. While checking out a new-to-me color at Sherwin-Williams called Slumber Sloth [9606], I found this Sherwin-Williams Color ID Quiz. Quizzes call to me. I took the quiz and learned that I am a Dreamer. Who’d probably sleep soundly in a room painted Slumber Sloth, don’t ‘ya suppose?

I am amused. For Christmas I got a page-a-day Peanuts calendar. It’s cute, featuring 6 comics per week total. From this calendar I learned that Charlie Brown’s favorite baseball team, a bush league team of course, is the Waffletown Syrups managed by Joe Shlabotnik. Because of course it was.

I am impressed. Never have I ever given a Bic pen a second thought. They just exist, ‘ya know? But come to find out they’re considered a game changer, a big deal in the world of pens. Read How the BIC Cristal Ballpoint Pen Became the Most Successful Product in History to learn more.

I am charmed. Well if you don’t find this link, Owls in Towels, to be about the sweetest ding-dang-darned thing that you ever did see, then are you even alive? ‘Nuff said. Go check it out.

I am snarky. The following is a WaPo chart about humidity. It’s a pretty chart in which a dew point number is correlated to how it feels to experience this dew point. This is all well and good if you happen to have straight hair, but I’m a woman with naturally curly frizzy hair all. the. time. THUS if I take this information verbatim I’m always living in a world with high humidity, aren’t I? And that just ain’t so.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

📌 On average how many nurdles a day do you use?

📌 If you’re a blogger do you do challenges &/or prompts? Thinking about them in general do you feel they:

empower you by providing you with a sense of community?
focus you by pointing you and your energy in one tangible direction?
restrict you by telling you what to do, but not how to do it?
limit you by squelching your inclination to do your own thing?
other?

📌 Would you paint your walls Slumber Sloth? If you took the S-W quiz what did your results tell you about you? Do you agree with the assessment?

📌 Got frizzy hair? How do you tame it? Or like me, have you given up on the idea?

📌 Anyone else about had it with WP? If so, whatcha gonna do about it?

+ • + • +

How Fare Thee? Two Lighthearted Conversations + A Fast Test To Determine Your Stress

May 20, 2025 / Ally Bean / 208 Comments

LAUGHING

A delightful former neighbor stays in touch. She moved across country and usually emails or texts, but one day she called me to talk.

Like old-timey friends.

In the process of catching up on who we each have stayed in touch with she asked me about, let’s call her, Martha.

While it’s been well over a decade since either heard from her directly, Martha is sometimes in the local news around here.

In fact I was able to explain to former neighbor that Martha, a state government employee, has been accused of failing to disclose a conflict of interest involving a corporate lobbyist. She has denied the accusations, but resigned from her job.

Upon hearing this my former neighbor shouted, “she didn’t do it.”

I asked, “how do you know?”

“Because there’s no way she’d do anything illegal.”

I persisted, “it’s been years since we talked with her, how can you be so sure? She may have changed. People do, you know.”

Former neighbor said, “because I sang with her in the church choir and no one in that group would ever do anything wrong.”

To which I replied sarcastically, “well there you go! As we all know singing your heart out for Jesus is a valid legal defense against criminal accusations.”

As if! 🙄

LOVING

I overheard this.

While this isn’t the first time I’ve written about a kid who got lost in the bottom of the ravine behind our house, this succinct little plea for help charmed me. Girlfriend was NOT happy and knew exactly who was to blame for her predicament.

Here’s what happened. I walked into our kitchen at the back of the house around 5:00 p.m. The windows were open and I immediately heard a LOUD kid voice [maybe age 5 or 6?] shouting from below.

“Find me,” the voice said.

I stepped outside onto the deck to see if I could see who was shouting.

“Find… Me…,” the voice commanded.

Squinting through the leafy tree branches I looked down into the ravine, but couldn’t see anyone. However I could hear a small person whose tone of voice didn’t suggest panic, just increasing irritation with the adult powers that be.

“FIND ME!”

I was about to shout back when I heard a dad say, “Katelyn? Is that you?”

“FIND ME, NOW!”

Picking up on the irritation in her voice I heard the dad start laughing as he asked, “where are you?”

Then in one of the best deadpan punchline deliveries ever our Miss Katelyn replied stating the obvious, “DOWN. HERE.”

She sighed loudly implying, I believe, that it took all her effort to not say *DUH* to this dimwitted dad person whose job it is to rescue her from predicaments like this one.

And with that her father, still laughing so loudly I could hear him, maneuvered down the side of the ravine cheerfully saying, “I’ll get ‘ya!”

And he did. 🥰

LEARNING

I stumbled over this Psychology Today How Stressed Are You? Test and decided to answer the 20 questions.

From my test results I learned that I’m at 24/100 and the average is 59/100. This means I’m “Not stressed” which came as a surprise to me. Not that I’m jonesing to be more filled with stress, mind you— just that I thought I’d rate a higher score.

I feel a bit like an underachiever.

However, I attribute my relaxed attitude to the fact that FOR ONCE our annual spring home maintenance that requires 5 scheduled visits from 4 companies has happened WITHOUT INCIDENT. This means that the landscape beds and the lawn sprinkler system and the gutters and the windows and the AC system have been mulched or activated or cleared or cleaned or serviced BEFORE Memorial Day.

A personal best! 😃

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Do you know anyone who is currently in trouble with the law? Is or was that person part of a church choir?

Have you ever called out for someone to rescue you? If so, did someone rescue you?

Had or overheard any funny conversations lately?

If you took the test how stressed does it say you are? Does this jive with how you feel?

~ ~ • ~ ~

The One About Affirmations & Allergies & Assertiveness, Oh My!

April 2, 2025 / Ally Bean / 211 Comments

The Affirmation Part

As I’m sure you realize, my little cherry blossoms of joy, there’s a difference between quotes and affirmations.

Quotes are thoughts said by someone. Ideally a quote, when properly sourced, is from an authority— maybe a person like a novelist or poet or songwriter OR from a well-known book or movie or TV show. When examined in their context quotes add depth to your thinking, speaking, writing.

Affirmations on the other hand are sayings that provide generic emotional support or encouragement. They tend to be popular ideas, often reflecting the existential angst of the era in which the affirmation originates. While an affirmation may be motivating for one person, it could just as easily be dismissed as poppycock by another person.

So keeping the foregoing in mind I share an affirmation that dropped into my sneezy life as I was scrolling along the interwebs. It stopped me long enough for me to muse upon its meaning | wisdom | value.

And how it could be a reflection of the times in which we live. The need to feel some control over something is powerful in the best of times and doubly so in our socially-mediated times. Maybe more so than in the past.

N’est-ce pas?

The Allergy Part

Without a second thought I can tell you the 3 months I like the best: October [at the top] – May – January. Then there are six other months I’m indifferent to, followed by the 3 months I dislike the most: February – August – April [at the bottom].

I apologize to people with April birthdays and wedding anniversaries, but for me April is a lousy month. This is because of ALLERGIES.

You see, I suffer from what the allergy doctors refer to as Rose Fever, the springtime equivalent to late summer’s Hay Fever [which I also suffer from]. While Hay Fever makes me tired, Rose Fever makes me irritable & leaves me feeling churlish.

It aggravates me in ways that fuel my natural penchant for being snarky, which I admit may work to my benefit. People tell me it’s my sassiness that draws them to this blog.

Thus this is where I find myself today, a woman muttering about her drippy nose, eyes that won’t focus, itchy skin, a mild never-ending headache, and the ability to sneeze loudly enough to startle Z-D when I’m downstairs and he’s upstairs on the other side of the house.

True story, really happened!

The Assertiveness Part

While researching something unrelated to that which follows I stumbled over another interesting online test that I had to take. I have a thing for them and from what I can tell so do my bloggy friends.

I realize I’ve been known to say that I believe life is one big ole test with a few pop quizzes along the way. I was being figurative but maybe for me it’s a literal thing.

Anyhoo I took the simple + fast Psychology Today’s Assertiveness Test that helps you determine how confident | bold | decisive you are.

From my results I learned that on a scale of 0 to 100 I rate 73. This puts me in the Somewhat Assertive range which means I’m an “effective communicator” who respects other people.

It also confirmed that I know that my “thoughts and feelings have value.”

Since becoming an adult I doubt there has rarely been a time when I didn’t know that my thoughts and feelings had value, but it’s good to have outside confirmation.

I guess…