Desperately Seeking Gladys Kravitz

June 20, 2014June 20, 2014 / Ally Bean / 34 Comments

Late Tuesday afternoon we received an email from the HOA. The message in the email told us that there had been 4 burglaries in the past 10 days in one part of our large subdivision.

Even though the break-ins are miles from where we live, the HOA asked that all residents turn on their outdoor lights at night. This is because the burglaries happened in the middle of night while families were at home, asleep upstairs.

[I’ll wait here while what I just wrote sinks into your brain. At home. Asleep. While having your house burgled. YIKES!]

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First of all let me tell you that we are a cooperative bunch of suburbanites when under attack. To wit, the last few nights our part of the subdivision has been so well-lit that pilots would feel comfortable landing their planes on our streets.

[So that’s a good thing. For us. And for Duke Energy, as well. *sigh*]

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And secondly, while I’m not thrilled with these latest developments, they do underscore the need for everyone who lives around here to be more aware of everyone & everything that goes on around here. That is to say, it’s time for you, my lovely neighbors, to look up from your smart phones and actually interact with your environment.

You know, like we did in the dark ages when phones with cords plugged into walls. And neighbors said “hello” to each other when they met on the street. And burglars knew that somewhere in every neighborhood was a nosy, noisy Gladys Kravitz who saw everything.

[Oddly enough, that’s who we need around here. Her prying eyes would be most helpful right about now, don’t you think?]

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BREAKING NEWS:

It’s 10:00 a.m. Friday morning and we just received this email update from our HOA:

“… we learned that there was another burglary attempt around 3am this morning at XXXX Drive. The police spotted the intruders before they were able to enter the home. The accomplice was caught, but the other burglar was able to get away.”

Now how long until the accomplice turns on the other burglar?

The New Neighbor Who I’m Not So Crazy About

February 20, 2014February 20, 2014 / Ally Bean / 22 Comments

Image Source: Sweet Clip Art

A neighbor clued me into the fact that there’s a registered sex offender living on our street. He moved here, sometime in the fall, into a smaller house on the edge of the subdivision.

I went online to the Sex Offender Registry to find out what he’d done, what he looked like and his exact street address. The information about his crimes was complete. There were two photos of him, one taken years ago and one more recent photo. Then Z-D & I drove up and down the street until we located his house.

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I have mixed feeling about this development. On the one hand, he has served his time and is doing exactly what the law requires him to do by registering. Perhaps there’s been some therapy along the way? He might be contrite, reformed.

But on the other hand I’m judgmental enough to not trust a 30-something, college-educated male who solicited minors online and got caught by the police when he showed up for the meeting. There’s something morally wrong with this scenario that I’m not sure I can overlook.

• • •

Thinking about it all, my negative attitude might be a bigger indictment of my inability to forgive than it is an accusation against him. Clearly, I haven’t yet figured out how to process this information, as this is the first time, to my knowledge, that I’ve lived near a registered sex offender.

I’ll let you know if/when I shift into a more forgiving point-of-view, but in the mean time, I think that I’ll just keep my distance from that end of the street. There are plenty of other directions I can walk around here. No need to tempt fate with an accidental meeting.

In Case You’ve Been Wondering Whether Or Not I’m A Sociopath

August 16, 2013February 25, 2015 / Ally Bean / 17 Comments

Going through my files I discovered the following.

Here is The Sociopath Test that I took to determine that I am a functional member of society.

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It’s easy to make light of a test like the funny one mentioned above, but answering the questions gave me insight into what behaviors to look for when I think that I dealing with a sociopath. They are those tedious people who only care about themselves and disregard anything you have to say. Antisocial behavior? Yes. No guilt about manipulating others? Yes. Rude, except when they want something? You betcha.

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According to the Mayo Clinic where sociopathy is a type of antisocial personality disorder:

“Antisocial personality disorder is a type of chronic mental condition in which a person’s ways of thinking, perceiving situations and relating to others are dysfunctional — and destructive. People with antisocial personality disorder typically have no regard for right and wrong and often disregard the rights, wishes and feelings of others.” [More here.]

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To my knowledge I don’t have any sociopaths running around in my life now. Not to say that there haven’t been a few of them along the way– just that I gave them the boot and they are no longer invited into my happy world.

In my experience, once someone with a tendency toward this sort of anti-social, user personality knows that I will call them out on their crap, they disappear forever because the last thing they want is for someone to shine light on them. Of course, I may have only dealt with slightly anti-social sociopaths, so my approach might not work with the really whacked, threatening ones. Don’t know what I’d do then.

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So, my gentle readers, what do you know about sociopaths? Are there any in your lives? Are you, heaven forbid, one of them?

And most importantly, what do you do when you find yourself sitting across the table from one? Avoid interaction OR destroy on the spot?

So What Ticked Me Off Yesterday?

June 20, 2013June 20, 2013 / Ally Bean / 19 Comments

I am a kind person so most of the time I overlook bad manners + rude behavior. But not every time.

There are limits. There are moments.

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People occasionally misinterpret my mellow attitude, thinking that I’ll put up with anything. That they can continue to misbehave + to complain ad nauseam.

This surprises me. Every lousy time.

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However, if someone continues to behave in a way that I deem inappropriate + selfish, I will detach myself from said person. Never to help him or her again.

And I will remember.