W Is For Walnuts, Why Not?

Screen Shot 2016-03-21 at 11.04.11 AM“Walnuts and pears you plant for your heirs.”

This proverb, which I suspect has been around as long as the English language as allowed “pears” and “heirs” to rhyme, is a wonderful nod to the wisdom of days gone by.

It’s an insight into how our ancestors approached the land.  They used the land to grow food and planned ahead in a way that I admire, yet do not want to emulate.

Zen-Den and I, being the modern suburbanites that we are, have been attentive to the need to improve our land, in a 21st century way, since the first day we got here.

DSCN7180Except for The Big Dig Project when we purchased 110 tons of dirt to form a backyard, most of our gardening efforts have been modest, with visible results in a year or two.

We attempt to beautify.

Like today, for instance, when, with your permission my gentle readers, I’ll go busy myself outside with a bit of weeding.  In the pretty garden.  Where the only thing edible is dandelion greens!

Q Is For Quince, Let Us Quote

Screen Shot 2016-03-21 at 11.00.12 AM“They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon, the moon.
They danced by the light of the moon.”

~ Edward Lear, The Owl and the Pussy-Cat

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I like quinces.

They’ve been around Europe since before medieval times, mentioned in literature by both the Romans and the Greeks.

If you’ve ever seen one in the produce section of the grocery store here on this side of the pond, you know that they’re pretty to look at, a nice yellow color.

Albeit they’re as hard as a butternut squash when you go to cut into one, they have an interesting shape, as seen in the image above.

They taste like spicy pear to me, and are delicious when made into a jelly or jam.

Or yummy as Membrillo [aka quince paste] with some Spanish Manchego Cheese OR Irish White Cheddar Cheese.

On an English Water Cracker, of course.  OR on an Italian Crostini, if that’s what you have around.

Perhaps with a glass of chilled New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc while sitting on a North American deck, waiting for the sun to set and the moon to rise, enjoying nature.

Yes, this is what I think of when I think of quinces: charming words, delicious international nibbles + kicking back to relax.

See why I like ’em?

N Is For Nuts, Please Note

Screen Shot 2016-03-21 at 10.55.52 AMNuttier than a squirrel’s pantry

… is a way to say someone is crazy, while not saying directly that someone is crazy.  It’s a cute turn of phrase, correct in the right context.  ‘Ya know?

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THE OTHER MORNING I was looking out into the forest behind our house, admiring the color green, when I noticed that Fuzzy the Squirrel was on the ground, up to something.

He rarely allows his little paws to touch the ground, preferring to stay above it all in the trees… or in our gutters… or on our deck.  I was intrigued.

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I’D BEEN THINKING ABOUT the origins of the saying, nuttier than a squirrel’s pantry, all morning.  So when I saw Fuzzy, in a flash of inspiration, I decided to ask him if he could explain the meaning of this saying, from his point of view.

Straight from the squirrel’s mouth, so to speak.

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WELL, MY GENTLE READERS, I was not prepared for what our favorite squirrel had to say.  But I give him credit, he told it like it is.  He didn’t mince words, nor did he spare my feelings.

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YOU SEE, COME TO FIND OUT, from a squirrel’s perspective, this seemingly innocent and silly human saying, is offensive and disparaging.

Squirrels take it personally, looking down upon us humans who say it.  To them, this saying is animalist.  Decidedly not PC.

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And inaccurate, as Fuzzy was quick to point out before he scampered away.  “Lady, we got more than nuts in our pantries. We got seeds and leaves– and sometimes a good old-fashioned purloined tomato from your very own pots of veggies.” 

Thus he confirmed that: 1) he did steal those tomatoes years ago;  and 2) that squirrels might not be as nutty as we humans think they are.

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F Is For Froot Loops, For Sure

Screen Shot 2016-03-21 at 10.43.08 AMJust Another Froot Loop to add To the bowl

… is one of my favorite sayings.  I first remember hearing it in the late 1990s, but other than that I don’t know its origin.

And I don’t care.

This is because when forced to listen to both sides of a longstanding neighborhood feud, I can say of it all, with detached amusement: I guess she’s just another froot loop to add to the bowl.

Which is true.  And not rude.  And gets me out of further conversation about an argument that has no definite solution, and I do not now, nor ever will, care about.

The argument being: is it better to home school or public school your children?  Like I have an opinion…?!  I don’t even have kids.

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“Luckily it hasn’t affected my appetite.”

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