A 3:00 A.M. Tale In Which We Experience Batshit Crazy For Real

As if last week, a difficult week for everyone, could not have been any stranger…

Forget your ancient church belfry, this tale takes place in modern times, starting in an upstairs suburban bedroom, moving to the two-story foyer, dashing about in 2 upstairs guest bedrooms, and culminating in the downstairs TV room adjacent to the kitchen.

Who is the star of this tale? Zen-Den, of course!

Here’s what happened.

I was awakened from a sound sleep when I heard the rattling of our wooden blinds at the bedroom window. I glanced over at the blinds and saw swooping birdlike shadows at the window. The shadows reminded me of scenes in the Alfred Hitchcock movie “The Birds.”

You see, in my drowsiness I thought somehow the bright light from the lamppost in front of the house was shining through the blinds making it appear that birds were creating shadowy silhouettes OUTSIDE the window.

But I was wrong.

I realized this when I got out of bed, walked over to the blinds to see what was going on at the window, only to learn that what I was seeing was INSIDE the house.

I definitively discerned this when something flew straight at me, swooped over my head as I hunched and shuddered, then dashed out the open bedroom door going into the foyer where it started flying around the chandelier like it was crazy.

Batty, even.

Fleece throw aka my impromptu babushka

Calmly, you would have been proud of me, I woke up Z-D who was oblivious to our winged intruder. I told him something was wrong, something creepy was flying around, and that he needed to get up to investigate. I also told him he’d be in the lead during the investigation.

I’d follow behind, on his six.

Utilizing my natural ability to scream loudly when under attack startled.

Without complaining he got up, dressing in jeans and a ragg wool knit beanie, and started walking around the upstairs rooms while I followed behind him, still in my jammies but with a plaid fleece throw [photo above] wrapped around my head like a Russian grandma in her babushka.

Quickly we realized that what I thought was a bird, was a bat. And that Z-D needed to get a broom from the garage, leaving me to stand alone in the foyer defending myself by screaming and holding a heavy doorstop [photo below] in front of my face, using it like a cross meant to keep vampires away.

This might have been helpful, maybe.

Heavy doorstop aka my potential weapon

The rest of this tale is what you’d expect if’n you’ve ever chased a bat through your house. We turned on lights everywhere. We got him out of one room, closed the door; then got him out of another room, closed the door; so on and so on, et cetera, et cetera. This went on until we were downstairs in the TV room where the bat was trying to hide on the floor in the shadows near a lounge chair.

Zen-Den saw him, wacked him with the broom, held him down, and shouted for me to get a cookie sheet from the kitchen. Which I did, putting it on the floor so that we could carefully slowly slide the bat, who was still alive and squeaking, onto it while Z-D used the broom to hold him down on the cookie sheet.

Together we slide our captive to the back door where Z-D then tossed the dude, who got into our house somehow but we don’t know how, outside into the snow.

The bat was shocked, but still alive, and gave us the evil eye as he straightened up and flew away into the night, no doubt as perturbed by this experience as we were.

And that, my gentle readers, is how it came to be that we experienced batshit crazy.

For real.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Have you ever had a bat flying around inside your home? Assuming you didn’t want a bat flying around inside your home, what did you do to get rid of it?

Bats are known for their exceptional hearing abilities. Do you see the irony in a bat waking me up in the middle of the night because I’m extremely sensitive to sound? Am I part old bat and don’t know it‽

What’s the last batshit crazy thing that happened in your world? Tell all, we need to know.

~ ~ ~ ~

As Summer Ends Happy House Is Happy: What I Learned About Exterior House Colors

Happy House

INTRODUCTION

What’s the word, hummingbird?

In this post I shall explain why having a freshly painted house exterior is a VERY BIG DEAL for us. And how this very big deal is the culmination of a project that we started, by signing a contract, ONE YEAR AGO this month.

At that time WE ARRANGED to have:

  1. a new deck built [read about it HERE];
  2. repairs to replace rotten wood on the exterior [read about it HERE];  and then
  3. the house trim and shutters painted by professional painters.

This has happened now and we ARE PLEASED with the results because it looks good. Plus it is never a bad idea to maintain the building that shelters you from the nature’s wrath and other people.

That being said an offshoot of this project is that I learned multitudes about CHOOSING EXTERIOR HOUSE COLORS. So much so that I’ve written the following in which I explain a bit about THE PROCESS that I/we went through before arriving at the color choices I/we did.

Please note: at the bottom of this post is a list of sources that I found helpful. 

OUR COLOR CHOICES

• The whole issue of deciding which colors to use on the exterior trim and shutters was contingent upon coordinating with the brick and the roof. Makes sense, right? Those two variables weren’t going to change in our lifetimes.

• Then we had to decide how light or dark we wanted the trim to be. Deciding this required an understanding of Light Reflective Values [LRV], defined by myperfectcolor.com as “… the amount of visible light that is reflected off a paint color, or conversely it represents the percentage of visible light that is absorbed by the color…. represented as a percentage with pure black being 0% and pure white being 100%.”

In our part of the world it’s currently trendy to use darker, more moody, colors on houses. While we both agreed it is stylish now, we don’t think of those colors as being cheerful or timeless.

Also the popular darker colors contrast less with the brick which contributes to, what I’d describe as, a bland uniformity; in my worldview the beauty is in the contrast between the brick and trim. Hence we stayed with a similar LRV [60 before/59 now], deciding to fine tune the undertone of our neutral.

• Thus we changed the color of the trim on the house from a gray with a slightly pinkish taupe undertone [SW7029 Agreeable Gray] to a gray with a decidedly greenish-yellow undertone [SW7050 Useful Gray].

The new color looks like the mortar between the bricks– or at least it does on three sides of the house. The reality is that you have to accept that the light hits your house differently on different sides of the house, therefore not every side will look spectacular with the same color on it.

• The shutters remained a dark green color [SW6261 Jasper] that, quoting Sherwin-Williams, “resonates with quiet force.” And I ask you, who among us doesn’t want forceful shutters?

The new neutral trim with the almost black shutters, while subtle and maybe not even noticeable to a casual observer, is wondrous, creating a cohesive color scheme that has made a big difference in the curb appeal of this property.

• By leaning into these earthy neutral colors that coordinate beautifully with our upgraded retaining walls made from natural golden gray limestone, the house looks more in tune with nature, less like a relic from 1999.

Now when I come home I see a house that looks soothing and inviting, pulled together, calm, in harmony with its surroundings, like the happy house we want it to be.

SOURCES

There are about a gazillion and two websites &/or articles that talk about how to choose paint colors, exterior and interior. The following were helpful to me. I’m receiving no paid compensation for sharing these:

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

What has been a VERY BIG DEAL for you during this Summer [northern hemisphere] or Winter [southern hemisphere]?

What have you LEARNED multitudes about?

Any PROJECTS PLANNED for the Fall [northern hemisphere] or Spring [southern hemisphere]?

~ ~ 🏠 ~ ~

July Reply: Answering YOUR Questions About Blogging [AMA Part 1 Of 3]

INTRODUCTION

This is the longest blog post I’ve written for this blog.

On the one hand this goes against my established blogging ethos: keep it snappy, keep it short.  BUT on the other hand, and this is the point I’m attempting to make, I appreciate the questions that you, the Cool Kids, asked me a few weeks ago on my June AMA post.

I want to answer them truthfully so I got wordy.

ALSO, and perhaps you picked up on this, my ulterior motive for soliciting your AMA questions wasn’t to give me a way to yada-yada-yada about myself more [Lord knows I’ve done that enough over the years], it was/is so that I have a smooth way to introduce you to each other.

Yep, that’s what I’m doing here.

You see, many new bloggers have found The Spectacled Bean in the last year and I wanted to create a way in which I could politely introduce y’all to each other: old-timers meet newbies, new-timers meet oldbies.

That sort of thing.

Thus by highlighting who asked each question and adding a link to their blog I am doing that, hoping to create and extend a sense of community that is, in my experience, the backbone of personal blogging.

But wait, there’s more.

In addition, as a way of visually breaking up this long post, I’ve added a few photos of TV show characters whose attitude, I believe, is representative of what it takes to be a well-rounded successful personal blogger.

See if you agree.

YOUR QUESTION + MY ANSWERS

The following questions, occasionally edited for clarity, are listed alphabetically using the first letter of the first name of the Cool Kid who asked the question. Thanks to everyone who asked a question. My answers immediately follow each question.   

🔹 Annika Perry from Annika Perry asks: Friendships formed here are very much part of the heart of blogging. In which ways are your friendships formed here similar and/or different to those in person?

MY ANSWER: My friendships in the blogosphere are based on kindred creative spirits who like to think about life and laugh often. My friendships in real life are based more on shared experiences and living geographically close to each other.

🔹 Christie Hawkes from So what? Now what? asks: As for my questions, when you first started blogging, did you intentionally set out to build your tribe of cool kids or did it happen more organically? Besides the effort that goes into reading and responding to comments, what else surprised you about blogging?

MY ANSWER: I didn’t set out to create a tribe of Cool Kids. It happened organically over time as more readers found my blog and jumped into the comment section. And that is the my biggest surprise about blogging: people are more than willing to chat about stuff IF you give them a nonjudgmental + fun online place to do so.

🔹 Donna Connolly from RETIREMENT REFLECTIONS asks: What is your biggest pet peeve about blog comments?

MY ANSWER: My biggest pet peeve is the way in which WordPress arbitrarily tosses some comments into moderation, or worse spam, when I’ve not put someone into moderation or marked someone as spam. Some long-time commenters are always sent into moderation and I don’t know why. Flip side, some never-commented-here-before commenters are sent straight through the system without being approved by me. It’s wacky.

🔹 E.A. Wickham from bleuwater asks: My questions are when did you start blogging and why? How has your blog changed through the years?

MY ANSWER: I started blogging in 2004 because I was curious to see what blogs were about. Early on had various blogs that I now refer to as my starter blogs. As a personal blogger I’ve morphed from a diarist, jibber-jabber-ing daily, to what I think of as a weekly newspaper lifestyle columnist, talking about my life, eclectic topics of interest, and what makes people tick.

Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation: OPTIMISTIC

🔹 Eilene Lyon from Myricopia asks: How does one go about creating a meme? Bear in mind this question comes from someone who couldn’t figure out how to use Canva.

MY ANSWER: I don’t have a good answer to your question because I’ve never made a meme. I just stumble over memes online. That being said I do use Canva to make pretty images with quotes, so even though you mention that you “couldn’t figure out how to use Canva” I went there to learn about memes.

I discovered THIS seemingly straightforward how-to guide for making memes. A weak answer to your question, but it’s all I’ve got.

🔹 Endless Weekend from The Endless Weekend asks: Is it mostly spam that ends up being “commented” on older posts? Is that the reason you close comments after a few weeks? Why is it that you close comments on older (and still interesting!) posts?

MY ANSWER: It got to a point where I was overwhelmed with spam on older posts, so to save my sanity I decided to close them. BUT the reality is that many people still comment on previously closed posts. They do so in any current post’s comment section, meaning that the conversation continues– and the spammers can suck it.

🔹 Esoterica from Existential Ergonomics asks: I’m curious about your thoughts about bridging the changing *you* across a decade plus of blogging.

MY ANSWER: In the process of writing a personal blog for almost two decades I realize that I’ve evolved into a more generous mellower soul, more open-minded, more precise with my word choices, and just happy to goof off here without any particular goal in mind.

🔹 Jennifer Stone from Still Bitchy After 60 asks: So how do you manage to make all your comments so genuine?

MY ANSWER: In truth I am curious about what people have to say so my interest is genuine. However I’ll admit that when I started blogging I was awful at comments: often what I meant to say and what I said were 180º opposite.

Thus I researched how to reply to comments. I learned that comment replies should: 1) mirror the length of the comment you’re replying to; 2) focus on all aspects of what the commenter said; and 3) be chatty not stilted & pedantic.

Clara Oswald from Dr Who: CURIOUS

🔹 Julia Preston from Voices in My Head asks: What the heck is AMA? 🤔

MY ANSWER: Mea culpa for not explaining that AMA stands for Ask Me Anything.  It’s lingo from Reddit.

🔹 Kendra Purtell from An Audience of One [rhetorically] asks: How do you NOT respond when someone is kind enough to not only read your post, but also leave a thoughtful comment?

MY ANSWER: I don’t get it either. I consider every comment a gift and I want to say *thank you* in the only way I can which is to reply to the comment. But not everyone thinks like I/we do.

🔹 Marian Beaman from PLAIN And Fancy asks: Does your husband read your blog posts? replies in the comment section?

MY ANSWER: My husband reads my blog. When he was working in a downtown office he’d comment on my posts in the comment section, BUT now that he’s at home he comments by telling me in person what he thinks.

🔹 Marie A Bailey from 1 Write Way asks: How often do people suggest that you should “monetize” your blog since you have created such an engaging community?

MY ANSWER: Occasionally I’ll get an email from a company that wants to form a brand alliance and have me write posts about their products or services. I politely say “no.” I write this blog for snorts and giggles, to keep my brain clicking and my heart open, so to use it for profit seems ill-considered to me.

🔹 Michelle Goggins from MG Doodle Studio asks: Do you have any other blogging etiquette advice?

MY ANSWER: I’m not sure that I do. Maybe remind people to check their spelling? Or make sure your links work? Or make your blog look pretty so people enjoy seeing it? That’s what comes to mind. Is that etiquette or just common sense?

Karen Walker from Will & Grace: AMUSED

🔹 NGS from The Time for Change asks: Do people ever reference things to you from your blog from a long time ago that you’ve completely forgotten about? How has your personal view on blogging changed over the years? The role of your blog in your life? Do you have any regrets about something you’ve posted/not posted?

MY ANSWER: Yes, people occasionally remember things I wrote about that I’d forgotten I wrote about and that’s trippy. My personal view of blogging has remained consistent over the years: blogging is a great way to communicate, feel understood, learn things, and LAUGH.

As for regrets, I know I’ve written posts that sounded meaner or loopier than I meant them to be, but I don’t regret it. You learn by doing when it comes to personal blogging. It’s all about being vulnerable, figuring out what works or not, then moving forward gracefully.

🔹 Nicole MacPherson from GIRL in a BOY HOUSE asks: Is there a TYPE of blog you like the best? Are there certain blogs that you favour for certain reasons?

MY ANSWER: I don’t lean into a specific niche of blogs. What I like to read, and this is incredibly subjective, is a blog written by someone who seems to have an authentic, slightly off-the-wall, personality. As long as the person doesn’t write anything crude or vile or inflammatory, I don’t care about their topics as much as the overall vibe of the blog.

🔹 Patty Moore Wilson from WEDNESDAY’S CHILD asks: I didn’t know I could close comments after a certain time!!! So… how do I do that?

MY ANSWER: In my version of WP you go to Settings, then Discussion, then Other comment settings, to “Automatically close comments on posts older than [you fill-in the number] days”

Once you do that you have to scroll down the page and hit Save Changes and then you’re all set. You can change the number of days anytime you want so it’s not like you’ve locked into it forever.

🔹 Pete Springer from Pete Springer asks: What do you do when working with a fellow blogger who wants to do a dual or guest post but isn’t communicative about when the post might come out?

MY ANSWER: Good question but I don’t really know. The bloggers I’ve worked with have been organized and precise about when something will be published. My only thought, an obvious one, is that you could try sending an urgent email asking for the “when” but this is personal blogging, not a work setting, so I don’t think you have much leverage.

Penny from The Big Bang Theory: DETERMINED

🔹 Rae Cod from RAE COD’S WRITING asks: I have you pegged as an epic time manager, capable of keeping up with all your blog comments… how long (on average) does it take?

MY ANSWER: I’ve never timed myself when it comes to replying to comments left on this blog. I pop in and out of blogland randomly during the day so I’m not sure.

That being said, let’s say I get 100 comments and it takes me 3 minutes to reply to each one: 300 minutes = 5 hours. On the one hand that’s a lot of time but it’s not all at once and it is at my own pace, so it seems like fun.

🔹 Shelley from Quaint Revival asks: Do you have a title in mind for a blog post Before or After you write the blog post and why? What inspires your clever titles? Do you write a post all in one setting or over a period of time in between your posts? What is one lesson for newbie bloggers to learn that you wish you had known at the beginning of your blogging experience?

MY ANSWER: I rarely have a blog title in mind when I start writing blog posts, they come to me in the process of writing. I write one blog post over many days, often in dribs and drabs, as time permits and inspiration finds me.

As a newbie I wish I’d understood that LESS IS MORE. Early on I drove myself batty posting daily, often long wordy posts, because I thought I was supposed to do that. But I learned otherwise and scaled back to a  weekly-ish schedule. Readers seem to respond positively to less from me, than to more from me.

That’s the lesson. 🙄

🔹 Suzanne from LIFE OF A DOCTOR’S WIFE asks: How many people in offline-life know that you blog? And do you ever get together with people you know from blogging (and nowhere else)? And do you ever get recognized in the wild? (Difficult, I know, without photos… but I feel like it COULD happen.)

MY ANSWER: Anyone who pays any attention to me in real life should know that I write a personal blog, having done so for almost 20 years now. My blog has never been a secret.

I’ve never gotten together with other bloggers. If they exist in the wild around here I don’t know who they are and obviously they don’t know who I am either. Or they know I’m here and just haven’t included me. That’s a possibility too.

🔹 Wynne Leon from Surprised By Joy asks: If answering comments wasn’t what you expected when you started blogging – what did you expect? And has what it has turned out to be better, worse, or just different?

MY ANSWER: I expected personal blogging to be small and more tight-knit than it is. I thought it’d be like efficiently sending a fast email to a few friends and family, just doing it publicly so that everyone could read it in the same place, then reply underneath. What I envisioned is what FB, that arrived on the scene a few years after I started blogging, turned out to be.

For me personal blogging has been much bigger and more far-flung; it’s better than what I thought it’d be. I live in the midwest USA yet connect with people around the world via their blogs, their interests, their lifestyles. It’s all good– and endlessly compelling.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Next week I’ll be back answering more questions, this time about who I am [HERE]. Then the following week I’ll conclude this AMA Extravaganza with a post comprised of your miscellaneous questions [HERE].

In the meantime, may I suggest that you take a peek at some of the bloggers who asked questions here. Who knows, you may make some new bloggy friends.

Waiting For A New Deck That I Shall Call Godot

“Let’s go.” “We can’t.” “Why not?” “We’re waiting for Godot.”
Samuel Beckett, Waiting for Godot

• • •

AS YOU MAY REMEMBER THE stairs to our deck fell apart in the fall of 2020. Read The One About The Deck Stairs Betraying Us [No One Was Hurt] to refresh your memory or learn about what happened.

As a result of the aforementioned situation we immediately began the search for someone to rebuild the entire deck. This was during the lockdown portion of the pandemic, so I figured we’d have no trouble finding people who’d want to work outside in the fresh air away from the virus where it was safe.

I was wrong.

I’ll succinctly summarize the search.

Because our deck is elevated 9 feet off the ground with a hill below it, after seeing what was going on only two companies expressed any interest in the job. Only one company managed to give us a written estimate for the job, so last fall we contracted with that company.

• • •

ALL OF WHICH BRINGS US to today, a lovely Tuesday morning in the winter of 2023, a mere 28 months after the problem began. This is how things are going.

If the company had begun building our new deck on January 3rd as planned, then today I’d have a lovely series of before | during | after photos to show you.

Alas things are behind schedule.

[I shall pause here whilst you *gasp* in surprise, as I know you’re doing.]

Therefore instead of the finished deck that was estimated to be completed in 7 to 10 working days [January 11th thru the 16th], I’ll end this post with a bunch of photos showing the ongoing mess that now involves snow [because of course it does] + some photos that suggest progress.

Even as I grumble and wait for Godot, testing my patience, I’ll admit that what I’m seeing so far is darned delightful and sturdy.

Eventually it’s gonna be great.

• • •

The aforementioned dodgy stairs on the old deck will be the last thing demolished.

The floor of old deck is the mess on the ground 9′ below.

Scene from the kitchen window showing no real floor just loose boards + no more railing just a drop to below.

The installation of the new deck floor begins.

New deck floor coming together in middle of the deck.

The new deck floor shown with a few of the new posts that’ll be part of the railing.

And finally 5″ of unexpected snow on top of the crumbling old deck stairs making them the poster child for unsafe.

• • •

Now it’s your turn to spill the beans.
What are you waiting for in your world today?
Tell all in the comments below.

• • •