May We All Be This With It When We Reach Our 70s

“I wore rouge today.”

I was standing in the personal care aisle at Kroger.  I wanted to buy some hair mousse, which is in a white container, and is on the shelf about ankle height, near the end of the aisle, on the left.

“Or I guess they call it blush now.”

In front of me was a woman, late-70s, with a coupon in her hand.  She and her cart were blocking my path– not because she was careless, but because shoppers and boxes of product yet to be stocked crowded the aisle.

“I have on mascara, too.”

She batted her eyes at me so I could see her blackened eyelashes behind her thick eyeglass lenses.

I smiled and said, “It looks nice.  I don’t have any on today.”  I batted my eyes back at her.

This made her smile.

“I don’t usually wear any, but I had to go somewhere special.  I went to lunch with a friend and there were men there.”

I smiled at her, nodded my head– and tried to casually, gracefully lean over to the left, reach around her cart and grab my mousse.

It was not meant to be.

“I’m sorry I’m in your way here.  But I have this coupon for $2.00 off and I can’t find the right product.”

I could see her predicament, the hair care line she was looking for had 4 different manifestations of their products, all in different colored bottles.

So I waited.  No rush really.

“It was a free lunch at Barrington Manor.  You know that place?  It’s assisted living for old people.  I’m not ready for that place yet.”

I told her that I knew where it was, in a fancy part of town.

“They had a make-up stylist after lunch who showed us how to wear make-up now that we’re senior citizens.  I didn’t have him do mine, but I asked questions.”

{ silence as she eyeballed the shelves  }

“And they gave us a make-up bag filled with $37.00 worth of free make-up.  FREE.”

{ big smile as she continued to look for the hair care product }

“Thirty-seven dollars!”

After about 30 seconds she found what she wanted to buy, then turned to me with her coupon and her product.

“This is right, isn’t it?  For the $2.00 off.  Like on the coupon.”

I looked at what she had picked up and pointed out that the words on her coupon were the same as the words on the bottle.

“Well, I hope I can read these words,” she said.  “I taught reading for years.  That’s what I did.  Read. Words.”

And with a chuckle and a “thank you” she moved on, leaving me to grab my hair mousse off the shelf and to reflect upon what it means to age stylishly while retaining your sense of humor.

May we all be so cheerful, curious and coherent when we reach her age.

Amen.

A Camellia In My Hair. If Only It Was That Simple.

Screen Shot 2015-07-02 at 9.14.12 AM

Click here for more style advice.

# # #

I am a hypocrite.

If you choose to walk away from this blog and never read another thing here, I understand.  No one wants to follow a hypocrite.

Even a sincere, idealistic, middle-aged poser such as myself.

You see, for YEARS I’ve said to anyone who’d listen, that when the time came, when the moment arrived, when faced with THE DECISION, I’d go forward.

Boldly.

Into the unknown with head held high.

I would not weasel out of the truth by using chemical substances to cover the obvious.  I would allow myself to go gray.

Naturally.

But last week, while getting my hair highlighted and cut, my stylist asked me, WITHOUT SO MUCH AS ONE WORD OF WARNING, if I was ready to go gray now.

She told me that underneath the two-tone highlights for which I pay a fortune, my natural hair color is 50% gray.  Meaning that if I wanted to, I could stop the highlights, save money and go gray.

But without one moment of thought, throwing aside all my highfalutin talk about aging gracefully, I shouted: NO. I WANT TO BE BLONDE.

Make me blonde, please.

And so it came to be that my hypocritical nature came to light.  Loud & clear.  And I walked away from the salon with silvery golden blonde hair.

Link Love: Women With Smarts Edition

~ ~ • ~ ~

•  Ducks and sponges.

“For ducks, other people’s emotions roll right off them…  Not so for sponges.  Highly intuitive types often soak up other people’s feelings…” ~ Anne at Modern Mrs. Darcy

•  What Your Favorite Summer Cocktail Says About You

“No matter where you go, you have an uncanny knack for getting everyone to tell you their life story.”  

•  10 Words Every Girl Should Learn

“After I wrote about the gender confidence gap recently, of the 10 items on a list, the one that resonated the most was the issue of whose speech is considered important.” ~ Soraya Chemaly

•  Ship Your Enemies Glitter

“Prank your Friends and Enemies. Let us send them some stupid glitter that is guaranteed to go everywhere. You don’t have to move a muscle.

•  Why You Should Kick Your Bucket List

“Well I propose that if you truly want to up your happiness factor, you need to kick that bucket list and make a f@ck it list.” ~ Elena at Fabulously 50 & Living With Batman

•  Everything Was New And Pretty Wondrous

“A long time ago (last week) in a city far, far away (Baltimore), Alice Bowman guided the most ambitious space mission in a generation. Here, she explains what it’s like to glimpse the edge of the solar system.” ~ Rachel Morris

•  The Cake Is A Lie

“The Cake is a Lie is a catchphrase… and is often used to convey the message that a promised gift is being used to motivate without any intent of delivering.”  

Welcome To Jibber Jabber July

Screen Shot 2015-07-03 at 8.27.24 AM

Scrat, my blogging muse, with acorn.

I STARTED KEEPING A BLOG when the earth was covered in ice.

Really.  It’s true.

Like one of my favorite cartoon characters, Scrat, the Ice Age squirrel, back then I focused on getting readers my acorn.  Keeping readers my acorn.

No matter what.

I posted almost daily.  Sometimes more than once a day even.  Can you imagine?

We all did.  Egos demanded it.

# # #

I ONLY SHARE THIS RETROSPECTIVE with you, my gentle readers, as a way of introducing you to a concept I dreamed up last week while I sat stuck inside my house due to massive amounts of rain.

This has not been the kind of summer to be outside.  Too wet.  Too moldy.  It makes me itch.

So I thought to myself…

Why not return to a modified version of old-time blogging and post here 3 or 4 days a week?  For one month.

Like I used to do when I was new to blogging and commenters were a dime a dozen and there was a sense of community among those of us who were either courageous enough OR crazy enough to share all the details of our lives with virtual strangers.

# # #

WITH THE FOREGOING IN MIND I have taken the liberty of creating my very own unique hashtag: #JibberJabberJuly.  It’s what all the cool kids do now, making hashtags that is.

Although they usually use some sort of acronym, or garbled words, that no one outside of their group understands.  Which I think sort of defeats the purpose of connection among virtual strangers.

But whatever.

To wit, I have used my propensity toward creative alliteration + my love of clear communication to gift the world with my hashtag.  Feel free, gentle readers, to adopt it, or the concept upon which it is based, as your own all month.

Let’s get it started jibber-jabbering in here.  Shall we?