It is 3:00 a.m. We are in bed asleep. At least one of us is…
HIM: Are you awake?
ME: {sleeping}
HIM: I think you’re awake.
ME: {ignoring him}
HIM: You were counting in your sleep.
ME: {rolling over in order to ignore him better}
HIM: Why were you counting in your sleep?
ME: Not counting, sleeping.
HIM: Ah-ha, so you are awake.
ME: {sigh}
HIM: So what were you counting? You woke me up because you were counting in your sleep. Out loud.
ME: Don’t know. Sleeping.
HIM: Ah-ha, so you admit to the fact that you were counting in your sleep.
ME: Don’t know. Maybe? Sleeping.
HIM: What were you counting in your sleep? Hmmm?
ME: SHEEP. I was counting sheep.
HIM: Really? I didn’t know people did that except in stories and commercials.
ME: Uh huh. SLEEPING.
HIM: What kind of sheep?
ME: Fluffy. White. Just basic sheep.
HIM: What were they doing? How were you counting them?
ME: THEY WERE JUMPING OVER A FENCE, OK? AND I COUNTED THEM AS THEY DID THAT.
HIM: Well, you don’t have to yell at me. I was only concerned that you were having a nightmare.
ME: I wasn’t before, but I sure am now.
HIM: Well, I’m going back to sleep now that I know you’re ok. Good luck with your sheep. Sorry you can’t sleep.
ME: {wide awake and fretful at 3:05 a.m.}
HIM: *snoring*