Because We Are Just That Exciting, We Went On A Date

April 15, 2013July 1, 2025 / Ally Bean / 17 Comments

On Thursday I got home late in the afternoon and saw that there was a message on the answering machine from Z-D. This struck me as odd because I had my cell phone with me and if he really wanted/needed to get hold of me STAT he’d use that method.

So I listened to the message, wondering what was up. As I did not just fall off the new wife-y turnip truck, I figured that there was something going on that was a bit wonky. And I was right.

• • •

First: He said, “I have an idea– let’s go out on a date tonight.”

[ME, suspicious: Hmmm.]

Next: He told me his date night plan. He wanted us to drive to a town about an hour away & pick up some sandwiches at a local grocery store that has a deli sandwich counter inside it.

[ME, with raised eyebrow: Okay, maybe.]

Then: He told me that he wanted us to go sit in a parking lot to watch some lights in the parking lot come on.

[ME, stunned: Do what?! That’s a date???]

Finally: He said, “I’ll pick you up at home in about an hour or so. See ‘ya soon. ‘Bye.”

[ME, shouting at the phone machine: That’s not a date. That’s something you have to do for work, isn’t it?]

• • •

And you know as I stood there staring at the answering machine I had three thoughts. Simultaneously. Before the machine even turned itself off.

My God we are old if this is his idea of a date. Honest to Pete, watch lights come on?!! What kind of date is that?
Rather clever of me to know that there was something up with this message before I heard it. I’m getting good at this marriage thing. Yeah me!
Well– phooey, I don’t have a thing planned for this evening and those sandwiches are yummy, so I guess that I’ll go out with him. Might be kind of fun.

… and you know what? It was.

I’m Twinkling Here, Said The Crow

April 4, 2013May 6, 2021 / Ally Bean / 37 Comments

~ ~ • ~ ~

“Twinkle, twinkle little star,

How I wonder what you are!

Up above the world so high,

Like a diamond in the sky.”

~ traditional English lullaby [from a poem by Jane Taylor (1783-1824)]

~ ~ • ~ ~

“Twinkle, twinkle little bat,

How I wonder what you’re at!

Up above the world you fly,

Like a tea-tray in the sky.”

~ Lewis Carroll [or the Mad Hatter, if you will]

~ ~ • ~ ~

“Twinkle, twinkle little crow,

How I wonder what you know!

Up above the deck so high,

Like an ominous evil eye.”

~ Ally Bean [blogger extraordinaire who likes to rhyme]

~ ~ • ~ ~

PLEASE NOTE: It has been brought to my attention that the stupid birds in these photos are not crows. These birds are something called TURKEY VULTURES. So, with the help of Zen-Den, I have rewritten my verse to accurately reflect this fact. Here goes:

“Twinkle, twinkle turkey vulture,

How I wonder what’s your culture.

Up above the deck so high,

Like an ominous evil eye.”

In Which I Am Not Mindful While Shopping In The Grocery Store

April 2, 2013January 28, 2021 / Ally Bean / 20 Comments

I found myself with an hour of free time late in the afternoon. As I was already out & about I decided to run into Kroger to pick up a few things. Because I wasn’t planning on going there, I didn’t have my shopping list with me.

I knew that I needed 6 items to make what I had in mind for dinner, so I decided to assign each ingredient to a finger/thumb. The result of this impromptu shopping list was that I looked like a child counting on my fingers as I shopped. Goofy as it was, my finger list did work. BUT it also meant that I started pushing my cart, a large one, with one hand.

And if there is anything that you must remember about me, it is that I am not too coordinated. Clumsy, even.

Thus, it will come as no surprise when I tell you that while counting on one hand and pushing the cart with my other hand I managed to block a produce aisle with my catty-wampus, slightly out-of-control cart.

I knew immediately that I was in the way. Pretty much because I heard the metal clank of my cart bumping another cart head-on. It’s a sound one recognizes even while staring at one’s fingers and thumb.

I looked up ready to offer an apology when I realized that the woman who I’d inconvenienced was Lilias Folan. As in someone famous. As in someone with a nationally syndicated PBS TV show. As in the woman who is sometimes credited with introducing yoga to the USA.

Yep, that’s who I bashed into in the grocery produce department. Good job, Ms. Bean.

But here’s the thing, Lilias was just standing there with a kind smile on her face waiting for the crazy lady [moi] to get out of her way. She had no where to back up to, so her choice was to be patient OR to get angry. And because she was living her life off the mat as she did on the mat, she chose the former.

Of course, me being me, after I said that I was sorry I tried to explain myself by babbling about fingers and no shopping list and dinner– et cetera, et cetera. And my dithery explanation, I’m happy to report, got Lilias laughing.

This made me feel better about my screw-up and got me thinking that it’s time for me to get back into yoga because I want to be that older woman with perfect posture, a calm aura & the ability to laugh when things go wrong.

And who better to emulate than Lilias? The bumpee in my ~~brush~~ bump with greatness.