Humor

Ignored At The Zoo

/ Ally Bean / 9 Comments

Yesterday afternoon Z-D and I went to the zoo.  It was hot and humid outside, but there was a light breeze.  I thought that I might be able to get some fun shots of the animals.  I was wrong.

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We were ignored by a little brown wild bird, even though I was standing about 18″ away from him when I took this photo.

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We were ignored by many turtles who ducked under the water the nanosecond before I clicked this photo.

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We were given the cold shoulder by the okapi…  

… who then wandered to the back of her enclosure, just to make sure that we got the message that we weren’t wanted there.

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We were warned off by this less than friendly sign posted by the gorillas.

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And finally we were ignored by this hippopotamus who had better things to do than pose for the camera.

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It’s a good thing that I have a quite a bit of experience with being ignored– and surviving the emotional shock of such indifference.  Heck, I’m a free spirit in suburbia, remember. Still, I have to admit that I thought that at the zoo, at least, something might pay attention to me, and help me achieve my goal.

But no such luck.  *sigh*

In Which Frick & Frack Sell Me Something

/ Ally Bean / 6 Comments

It’s been hotter than normal around here this summer.  Late yesterday afternoon, when the heat and humidity were at their worst, I went to the grocery.  It was a miserable time to be outside.

Standing under the awning outside the entrance to the doors to the store were two boys about 15 years old.  The first kid, Frick, was big and had very curly, light brown hair;  his smile was ginormous.  Behind him was a super skinny, shorter kid with straight dark hair– and a very loud voice.

They were selling a restaurant coupon book for their high school football team.  And they were doing it in such a way that I was trapped standing out in the sun while they gave me their sales pitch.

  • Frick: [gliding smoothly into my path toward the door]  Hi!  We’re selling a coupon book with lots of really awesome stickers in it for our football team.
  • Frack: [loudly, jumping to the side of Frick]  They’re not stickers…. THEY’RE COUPONS.  FOR RESTAURANTS.
  • Frick: [stepping in front of Frack while still blocking my way into the store]  Oh yea, that’s it.  We’re selling a book of coupons to really awesome places to eat like McDon—
  • Frack: [loudly, pushing Frick aside]  GREAT DEALS.
  • Frick: [elbowing Frack aside, not missing a beat]  –alds and some pizza places.  This is for our football team and it’d be gre–
  • Frack: [loudly, jumping to the other side of Frick]  GOOD COUPONS.
  • Frick: [standing up very tall and stretching his shoulders out to stop Frack from coming anywhere near me]  It’d be great if you could buy one…
  • Frack: [loudly, standing behind Frick trying to jump high enough to see me over his head]  GREAT DEALS.  [jump]  FOR RESTAURANTS.
  • Frick: [sighing and allowing Frack to stand beside him]  … for only $20.00.
  • Frack: [loudly, bouncing in place]  TWENTY DOLLARS.

Now anyone who knows me knows that I’ll buy just about anything from a kid.  And anyone who knows me knows that I’ll do just about anything to not stand out in the hot sun. Meaning that this transaction was a done deal before the first word came out of Frick’s mouth.

So I bought one of the coupon books.

I doubt that we’ll ever use anything in there, but that doesn’t matter.  The entertainment value of Frick & Frack’s sales pitch was priceless.  Definitely one of the best I’ve experienced in a long time.  It makes me think that someone over at the local high school is doing something right.  What exactly that right thing is, I’m not sure.  But something.

‘Cuz man-oh-man, those two boys were effective.  And funny.

Oh, You’ve Got To Have Friends

/ Ally Bean / 9 Comments

I found this photo when I was going through some boxes of stuff that I’ve dragged around with me for years.  I’ve been in an organizing mood of late.  Most of the stuff in the boxes was of no value, but this photo– well, it’s a classic.  Worthy of note.

It’s a photograph of my third grade class.  I’m the girl in the middle of the front row holding my hands behind my back.  With long blonde hair.  Sporting a lovely pair of cat eye spectacles.  Tres chic!

Looking at this photo I have no idea why I’m not wearing a cute little plaid dress like the other girls.  I had lots of them, but for some reason I’m standing there in a shapeless jumper.  My mother worked when I was a kid, so maybe this was the only outfit that was clean that day for me to wear.  That could be it.  Or maybe I forgot that it was photo day and put the jumper on instead of something cute.  That’s probably more like it.

I have good memories of third grade.  Mrs. Bosh, our teacher, was enthusiastic and fun. The kids in my class were silly and goofy and friendly.  I remember adoring arithmetic & science, and that we did the coolest art projects.  I remember despising spelling tests, while thoroughly enjoying music class.

I also remember receiving my first Nancy Drew book that year.  It was a birthday present from the girl on the end of the front row nearest to the teacher.  I still have the book in fact.

But what I remember the most about third grade is that we played lots of games on the playground– and we included everyone.  No cliques.  No clubs.  No snobs.  That’s what was coming our way in fourth grade.

Of course, we didn’t know that yet when this photo was taken.  We were still just a bunch of happy kids.  Friends.  Wearing our best clothes and smiling for the camera.