The One About An Empathetic Chatbot, A Crazy Quilt Garden, & An August Blogging Break

A REMINDER THAT COMMUNICATION CAN BE TRICKY

Thanks to Marie I learned about a TV series called Astrid. It’s a drama about a woman [Astrid] with Asperger’s syndrome who works for the police in their library. She loves puzzles, remembers everything, and helps the police solve crimes.

The series does a good job of presenting Astrid and all her quirks in a thoughtful way. She’s socially awkward but not mean-spirited. She is neurodivergent, not always catching onto the subtext of conversations or situations.

Social cues escape her, strict habits keep her sane.

It’s fascinating to watch her and has made me more aware of the communication divide between neurotypes.

To wit, the other day I came across an article in Reuters, ‘It’s the most empathetic voice in my life’: How AI is transforming the lives of neurodivergent people. The gist of the article is that AI-powered chatbots, such as NeuroTranslator, can help neurodivergent people communicate more clearly, reducing misunderstandings.

All one has to do is ask AI about your quandary, then it’ll explain what’s happening from a neurotypical point of view.

Below is a screenshot of a conversation in which Micheal who is neurodivergent asks AI to help him understand why his wife, Jennifer who is neurotypical, took offense at his comment about her shirt. The chatbot tells him that “Neurotypicals often expect more positive feedback…” than his direct comment, thus she was peeved.

Welp, here’s the thing: With all due respect to the chatbot, I don’t see anything wrong with what Micheal said to Jennifer.

So does this mean I’m neurodivergent and don’t know it? I could envision me saying something like what Micheal said, direct & to the point. No harm, no foul.

Or thinking about it in a different way, I wonder about Jennifer’s state of mind. She seems a little neurotic to me, maybe insecure.

Granted I don’t take much of anything personally and I know to consider the source, but if Micheal told me his honest assessment of my shirt, unlike Jennifer I’d have smiled and said “thanks.”

No big deal.

~ • ~
A LOOK AT MY CRAZY QUILT GARDEN, A WORK IN PROGRESS

I’m calling my latest attempt at creating a butterfly garden as a Crazy Quilt Garden.

Crazy quilts were popular in the late 1800s. Victorian women created them using a patchwork of irregularly-shaped fabric piece sewn together then embellished with embroidery, ribbon, beads, and lace. The resulting quilts were idiosyncratic works of art with no repeating motifs like you see in Amish quilts.

Because I  wasn’t happy with our rigidly organized flower garden with its repeating motifs, last fall I pulled out most of the perennials with the intention of creating a less organized ‘country-style’ garden for the butterflies and bees. I wanted a purposely mixed-up garden like a crazy quilt.

I left the roses, salvia, Russian sage, and milkweed because they were/are thriving and make a good backbone for this little area. Then this past spring I planted some new perennials [bee balm, daisies, Pentas, and rudbeckia] plus a few herbs [basil, thyme, mint, dill, and rosemary] that I knew were popular with butterflies and bees.

I also tossed in some marigolds, an annual, to add dots of color. Plus scattered some zinnia seeds for fun. So far everything has grown [except the dill] and is looking a little wild and raggedy like I’d hoped it would. But there’ve been no butterflies only bees which is good, but not cool like having butterflies around.

Still I am hopeful.

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A PLAN TO NOT BE HERE IN AUGUST

If you’ve followed The Spectacled Bean for a while you know that I often take a blogging break in August. I don’t like August. The heat & humidity + the pollen makes me itchy, twitchy, and bitchy.

While I admit that being bitchy can be a great catalyst for interesting blog posts, the itchy and twitchy part requires that I get cozy with the girls— Pat, Vertie, and Flo. I’m talking about Pataday eye drops, Alavert antihistamine pills, and Flonase nasal spray.

Meds for seasonal allergies, ‘ya know.

And the thing is that the girls make me tired so that writing seems like a chore instead of a joy. And I won’t let blogging become a chore. That would never do.

Soooo I’m ducking out of blogland for the month of August. I hope to return in September after allergy season is history for me.

Later, kids!

~ • ~
QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Are you fascinated by the ways in which people communicate? Are you aware of anyone in your life who is neurodivergent?

Do you have a flower garden? And if so, Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary, how does your garden grow? Do you have butterflies and bees?

Does anyone have fun plans for August? Just because I dislike the month doesn’t mean I expect anyone else to feel the same way. 

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Look At That: Learning About Cicadas, Laughing About A Credit Card

The Educational Cicada Part – EEK!

SINCE MID-MAY WE’VE BEEN experiencing Cicada Brood 14 here. Cicadas are insects that emerge into the world on a 17 year cycle. It is their year to show up for 4 to 6 weeks then die.

Cicadas, who have beady orangish red eyes, come up out of the ground and climb on/cling to surfaces that have texture, like trees and bricks and screens. They are everywhere outside the house and when clinging to window screens they appear to be watching you inside.

Not creepy at all. 😳

• • •

• • •

WE ARE PEOPLE WHOSE backyard is a woods, thus the arrival of Brood 14 has not been a joyful experience.

I cannot confirm how joyful the cicadas may or may not be, but from their dramatic random flitting about during daylight hours I’d guess they’re happy enough. After all they are here to do one thing: to engage in amorous congress mate.

After mating the adults lay their eggs and the cicada babies (nymphs) hatch in 6 to 10 weeks. Then the nymphs will burrow into the ground where they’ll live until 17 years hence when they emerge.

While cicadas don’t swarm or sting or bite anything or anyone, they are noisy. As in daily highs of 80 decibels [the sound of a lawnmower] to 120 decibels [the sound of a motorcycle revving]. This is what the newspaper told me and I believe it.

It is deafening.

• • •

• • •

HOWEVER HERE’S THE THING about these intrusive bugs. Remember when we got the new deck and I spent about a year deciding which color of Trex to use so that the deck would look natural as if it was made from real wood from the trees in the forest primeval behind us?

Well apparently I succeeded beyond my wildest dreams. Come to find out Coastal Bluff, the color of our deck, is such a dead ringer for the tree trunks that cicadas love it.

In fact they find it the perfect place to hang out and do their aforementioned thing— then join the choir invisible drop dead.

All day long.

The Amusing Credit Card Part – WTF!

The other day Z-D walked down to the mailbox, dodging cicadas, and came back into the house laughing while holding up a Visa card. I didn’t understand what was going on because we don’t have Visa.

Welp, come to find out the large company he used to work for, the one he formally retired from in the fall of 2022, had sent him a corporate business credit card with a limit of $15,000.00!

Obviously this was a test of good moral character. 🙄

My first thought was, and try not to think less of me when I say this, a vacation in Hawaii would be nice. Or how about going to London, England, for a week? Yep, we could make good use of that credit card.

BUT WE DIDN’T.

Instead Z-D immediately emailed his former boss letting him know what he had in his hand, asking for guidance about what to do with it.

And eventually, about two weeks later, Zen-Den received a snail mail letter from large company that said [of course] don’t use it and destroy it immediately because there’s been a mistake!

‘Ya think?!!

• 🧡 •
Now it’s your turn to spill the beans.
What’s bugging you in your world today?
If a surprise $15,000.00 landed in your hands, through no malfeasance of your own, what would you think about doing with it?
Tell all in the comments below.
• 💵 •

What To Do, What To Do? A Simple Way To Make A Decision + Kate’s Five Things

I’ve heard it said that when you need to make a decision and you find yourself stumped about what to do, your answer will become clear by asking yourself: what would make my 7 y.o. self proud and my 80 y.o. self grateful?

Today I’m asking myself this proud/grateful question because on the surface of it I have nothing to write about. Not that I don’t do things, but what I do to stay busy isn’t necessarily interesting to anyone else, me thinks.

I mean, I got a new prescription for my glasses & I planted some zinnia seeds & I discovered that a snazzy new-to-the-area convenience store, Sheetz, carries my favorite difficult-to-find candy bar, Zagnut. Thus I am seeing clearly & hoping for some late summer blooms & grooving on yumminess.

I’m happy, my bliss is buzzing as they say, but I can’t help but pondering: shouldn’t there be more to this blog post than a few random glimpses into my daily life? 

And you know what?

Both my 7 y.o. self and my 80 y.o. self say YES!

Thus I’m answering Kate’s Five Things questions. They are a weekly feature on House Call WITH KATE ARENDS who you may know from her blog Wit & Delight.

Her questions + my answers are as follows:

• When did you feel most at home this week? 

Answer: in the kitchen while I made a new delicious recipe, Raspberry-Ricotta Cake. I enjoy baking and I enjoy bouncing around in the kitchen creating a mess while following, but also tweaking, recipes. [I added 1/4th teaspoon lemon extract to bring out the berry’s citrus flavor.]

• Where are you moving forward?

Answer: in the last few months I’ve come to appreciate how organized I’ve become since March 2020, the official beginning of the Covid-19 Pandemic. Not that we were living in chaos before but I’ve come to  realize that I didn’t know what we had + where it was, and this was causing me to feel a low level of anxiety. Now I feel more in control, proactive, rather than at loose ends, reactive.

• Where are you stuck?

Answer: I’m not a person who enjoys learning about technology. Recently I moved from an iPhone 8 to an iPhone 16. I’ve become overwhelmed and bothered by its newness: too many different ways of doing what I used to know how to do + too many new computer-y fiddly bits, none of which I asked for, that I now must contend with.

• What did you consume that was regenerative?

Answer: I read The Cat Who Saved Books by Japanese author Sōsuke Natsukawa. It’s a short novel, a fable, about the positive power of books and the types of people who disabuse this power. The protagonist, a lonely teenage boy, follows a cat into different realms to [you guessed it] save books. It’s a charming tale, insightful, gently pointing out flaws in human nature. 

• What question are you asking?

Answer: Does this matter? And if so, where is the story?

~ 🤓 ~
QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

What have you done recently that would make your 7 y.o. self proud and your 80 y.o. self grateful?

Currently, in general, how organized do you feel you are? Is being organized a goal for you?

When thinking about books you have consumed [read], which one or ones has/have helped you feel regenerated, revitalized, ready to take on life anew?

What is your favorite candy bar? What is your favorite cake?

~ ~ 😋 ~ ~

How Fare Thee? Two Lighthearted Conversations + A Fast Test To Determine Your Stress

LAUGHING

A delightful former neighbor stays in touch. She moved across country and usually emails or texts, but one day she called me to talk.

Like old-timey friends.

In the process of catching up on who we each have stayed in touch with she asked me about, let’s call her, Martha.

While it’s been well over a decade since either heard from her directly, Martha is sometimes in the local news around here.

In fact I was able to explain to former neighbor that Martha, a state government employee, has been accused of failing to disclose a conflict of interest involving a  corporate lobbyist. She has denied the accusations, but resigned from her job.

Upon hearing this my former neighbor shouted, “she didn’t do it.”

I asked, “how do you know?”

“Because there’s no way she’d do anything illegal.” 

I persisted, “it’s been years since we talked with her, how can you be so sure? She may have changed. People do, you know.”

Former neighbor said, “because I sang with her in the church choir and no one in that group would ever do anything wrong.” 

To which I replied sarcastically, “well there you go! As we all know singing your heart out for Jesus is a valid legal defense against criminal accusations.”

As if!  🙄

LOVING

I overheard this.

While this isn’t the first time I’ve written about a kid who got lost in the bottom of the ravine behind our house, this succinct little plea for help charmed me. Girlfriend was NOT happy and knew exactly who was to blame for her predicament.

Here’s what happened. I walked into our kitchen at the back of the house around 5:00 p.m. The windows were open and I immediately heard a LOUD kid voice [maybe age 5 or 6?] shouting from below.

“Find me,” the voice said.

I stepped outside onto the deck to see if I could see who was shouting.

“Find… Me…,” the voice commanded.

Squinting through the leafy tree branches I looked down into the ravine, but couldn’t see anyone. However I could hear a small person whose tone of voice didn’t suggest panic, just increasing irritation with the adult powers that be.

“FIND ME!”

I was about to shout back when I heard a dad say, “Katelyn? Is that you?”

“FIND ME, NOW!” 

Picking up on the irritation in her voice I heard the dad start laughing as he asked, “where are you?”

Then in one of the best deadpan punchline deliveries ever our Miss Katelyn replied stating the obvious, “DOWN. HERE.”  

She sighed loudly implying, I believe, that it took all her effort to not say *DUH* to this dimwitted dad person whose job it is to rescue her from predicaments like this one.

And with that her father, still laughing so loudly I could hear him, maneuvered down the side of the ravine cheerfully saying, “I’ll get ‘ya!”

And he did. 🥰

LEARNING

I stumbled over this Psychology Today How Stressed Are You? Test and decided to answer the 20 questions.

From my test results I learned that I’m at 24/100 and the average is 59/100. This means I’m “Not stressed” which came as a surprise to me. Not that I’m jonesing to be more filled with stress, mind you— just that I thought I’d rate a higher score.

I feel a bit like an underachiever.

However, I attribute my relaxed attitude to the fact that FOR ONCE our annual spring home maintenance that requires 5 scheduled visits from 4 companies has happened WITHOUT INCIDENT. This means that the landscape beds and the lawn sprinkler system and the gutters and the windows and the AC system have been mulched or activated or cleared or cleaned or serviced BEFORE Memorial Day.

A personal best! 😃

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Do you know anyone who is currently in trouble with the law? Is or was that person part of a church choir?

Have you ever called out for someone to rescue you? If so, did someone rescue you?

Had or overheard any funny conversations lately? 

If you took the test how stressed does it say you are? Does this jive with how you feel?

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