The One About An Empathetic Chatbot, A Crazy Quilt Garden, & An August Blogging Break

July 29, 2025 / Ally Bean / 230 Comments

A REMINDER THAT COMMUNICATION CAN BE TRICKY

Thanks to Marie I learned about a TV series called Astrid. It’s a drama about a woman [Astrid] with Asperger’s syndrome who works for the police in their library. She loves puzzles, remembers everything, and helps the police solve crimes.

The series does a good job of presenting Astrid and all her quirks in a thoughtful way. She’s socially awkward but not mean-spirited. She is neurodivergent, not always catching onto the subtext of conversations or situations.

Social cues escape her, strict habits keep her sane.

It’s fascinating to watch her and has made me more aware of the communication divide between neurotypes.

To wit, the other day I came across an article in Reuters, ‘It’s the most empathetic voice in my life’: How AI is transforming the lives of neurodivergent people. The gist of the article is that AI-powered chatbots, such as NeuroTranslator, can help neurodivergent people communicate more clearly, reducing misunderstandings.

All one has to do is ask AI about your quandary, then it’ll explain what’s happening from a neurotypical point of view.

Below is a screenshot of a conversation in which Micheal who is neurodivergent asks AI to help him understand why his wife, Jennifer who is neurotypical, took offense at his comment about her shirt. The chatbot tells him that “Neurotypicals often expect more positive feedback…” than his direct comment, thus she was peeved.

Welp, here’s the thing: With all due respect to the chatbot, I don’t see anything wrong with what Micheal said to Jennifer.

So does this mean I’m neurodivergent and don’t know it? I could envision me saying something like what Micheal said, direct & to the point. No harm, no foul.

Or thinking about it in a different way, I wonder about Jennifer’s state of mind. She seems a little neurotic to me, maybe insecure.

Granted I don’t take much of anything personally and I know to consider the source, but if Micheal told me his honest assessment of my shirt, unlike Jennifer I’d have smiled and said “thanks.”

No big deal.

~ • ~

A LOOK AT MY CRAZY QUILT GARDEN, A WORK IN PROGRESS

I’m calling my latest attempt at creating a butterfly garden as a Crazy Quilt Garden.

Crazy quilts were popular in the late 1800s. Victorian women created them using a patchwork of irregularly-shaped fabric piece sewn together then embellished with embroidery, ribbon, beads, and lace. The resulting quilts were idiosyncratic works of art with no repeating motifs like you see in Amish quilts.

Because I wasn’t happy with our rigidly organized flower garden with its repeating motifs, last fall I pulled out most of the perennials with the intention of creating a less organized ‘country-style’ garden for the butterflies and bees. I wanted a purposely mixed-up garden like a crazy quilt.

I left the roses, salvia, Russian sage, and milkweed because they were/are thriving and make a good backbone for this little area. Then this past spring I planted some new perennials [bee balm, daisies, Pentas, and rudbeckia] plus a few herbs [basil, thyme, mint, dill, and rosemary] that I knew were popular with butterflies and bees.

I also tossed in some marigolds, an annual, to add dots of color. Plus scattered some zinnia seeds for fun. So far everything has grown [except the dill] and is looking a little wild and raggedy like I’d hoped it would. But there’ve been no butterflies only bees which is good, but not cool like having butterflies around.

Still I am hopeful.

~ • ~

A PLAN TO NOT BE HERE IN AUGUST

If you’ve followed The Spectacled Bean for a while you know that I often take a blogging break in August. I don’t like August. The heat & humidity + the pollen makes me itchy, twitchy, and bitchy.

While I admit that being bitchy can be a great catalyst for interesting blog posts, the itchy and twitchy part requires that I get cozy with the girls— Pat, Vertie, and Flo. I’m talking about Pataday eye drops, Alavert antihistamine pills, and Flonase nasal spray.

Meds for seasonal allergies, ‘ya know.

And the thing is that the girls make me tired so that writing seems like a chore instead of a joy. And I won’t let blogging become a chore. That would never do.

Soooo I’m ducking out of blogland for the month of August. I hope to return in September after allergy season is history for me.

Later, kids!

~ • ~

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Are you fascinated by the ways in which people communicate? Are you aware of anyone in your life who is neurodivergent?

Do you have a flower garden? And if so, Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary, how does your garden grow? Do you have butterflies and bees?

Does anyone have fun plans for August? Just because I dislike the month doesn’t mean I expect anyone else to feel the same way.

~ ~ • ~ ~

Love Many, Trust Few: 7 Random Things To Tell You On A Tuesday In May

May 6, 2025May 6, 2025 / Ally Bean / 246 Comments

As they say: Love many, Trust few, Always paddle your own canoe

1 – I am vexed. I was a fan of Tetris when it first came out, became pretty darned good at it on my Game Boy, so when I stumbled over 368 Chickens I was enthusiastic. But this free little online game is impossible to win and I resent this. I keep trying to get to the goal, zero chickens, but consistently fail. Apparently this game, like many things in life, is designed to frustrate more than empower.

2 – I am laughing. I’ve wondered about the origins of Pantone, the company that decides which colors are THE ones we’ll be seeing and wearing everywhere during a year. Here’s an infographic explaining the company’s history plus adds a few suggestions for *revised* color names. For example, I adore a shade of blue renamed from Classic Blue to Postman’s Trouser. A better name, yes?

3 – I am unsettled. I used BookRaid AI’s Title Generator, followed by their Pen Name Generator, then their Book Plot Generator to see what artificial intelligence would tell me about writing a fiction book. The experience was unnerving because the suggestions were almost instantaneous, the ideas weren’t bad, and the plot was believable enough.

Thus a head’s up: if you see Violet Whitley’s children’s book called Paws and Claws: Unraveling the Mystery of the Wall Destroyer, A Story about Mittens and Whiskers, Feline Detectives, you’ll know it was *written* by me.

4 – I am excited. On my radar is the May 8th return of the TV series, Poker Face. Starring Natasha Lyonne as detective Charlie Cale this show’s first season was wonderful and that’s no bull shit. It’s well-paced, quirky, and off-the-wall in a good way, just the kind of entertainment to keep me upbeat.

5 – I am nerdy. I find typography interesting and enjoy punctuation so when Zen-Den saw a copy of AN ADMIRABLE POINT, A Brief History of the Exclamation Point! he bought it for me. [Thank you Zen-Den.] The book describes itself as reclaiming “the exclamation point from its much-maligned place at the bottom of the punctuation hierarchy.” Reading along in this witty little book I have to admit that I’m now a recovering punctuation snob who will henceforth adopt a more respectful attitude toward exclamation points!!!

6 – I am amused. According to the results of an online survey sometimes grandparents do not like their grandchildren’s names feeling the names are “ugly, old-fashioned, weird.” This can be problematic. The top hated names are Aurora, Charlotte, Elijah, Finn, Jack, Lindsay, Noah, Sally, and Tabitha.

For what it’s worth as a child-free woman I like those names and have never taken issue with my friends’ kids’ names. Although I have wondered [quietly to myself] about unusual spellings of names: a Candace spelled Candyce OR a Dana spelled Dhana. Seems like you’re burdening your child with a lifetime of correcting everyone about how to spell their first name.

7 – I am contemplative. Years ago, as an adjunct to determining what I am grateful for at the end of each day, I began answering the question: what have I learned today? I ask myself this question every night, sometimes surprised by my answers. I do this because I find that framing my life as an ongoing learning experience prompts me to keep engaged in life itself.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

Have you ever played Tetris? Have you watched Poker Face? How do you goof off in your free time?

Do you believe, like I do, that the naming of colors is a career you were meant for but never found?

Does the mere existence of AI make you mutter and start to get twitchy?

Thinking about children’s names, have you ever disliked a child’s name so much that you voiced an opinion about it? How did that work out for ‘ya?

What have you learned today?

• + • + • + •

Because You Asked: This Is How I Decide What To Write About In My Personal Blog

April 22, 2025April 22, 2025 / Ally Bean / 266 Comments

EARLY THE OTHER MORNING the 6:30 a.m. temp was 71º F and sitting outside in nature with my morning mug of coffee was my plan. It was too nice outside to not take advantage of it.

I told Z-D, I’m going to go outside and look at the moon I can’t see.

I sauntered outside onto the deck and plopped down on a chair. I looked up into the sky where a few wandering clouds obscured the bright waning gibbous moon, making the scene look indistinct and otherworldly.

I liked it.

• • •

Once upon a time a light-hearted blogger named KizzyLou created a blogging club for laid-back bloggers. She made personalized membership cards for everyone. This is mine.

• • •

THUS WHILE BASKING IN the hazy moonlight I began to contemplate what I could write about next on ye olde bloggy. I was feeling woo-woo in the moment, allowing my mind to attend to whatever floated into it.

Point of fact, I usually have an idea about what I’ll be talking about before I sit down to write it. I rarely do stream of consciousness posts wherein my unedited disjointed thoughts spill out. Instead I lean into thinking beforehand about what specifically I’ll be going on about, then sit down and write – edit – rewrite – edit – edit some more – then publish.

Don’t bore us, get to the chorus!

[The subtext of how I write everything here.]

Of course as a blogger who primarily writes a character-driven blog the foregoing makes sense. I adore reading plot-driven blogs, which seem to be more the done thing now, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable telling y’all everything I do in a linear Dear Diary approach to personal blogging.

You would yawn.

Instead I allow what happens within me to be the catalyst for blog posts creating what has been described as an old-fashioned newspaper Lifestyle Column approach to personal blogging.

[More information on the difference between plot-driven versus character-driven HERE.]

• • •

Currently WordPress explains who writes & edits this blog as a team of one— meaning I’m chief cook and bottle washer.

• • •

HENCE I SHOW UP to my blog ready to answer the question “What up Buttercup?” not with the exact details of my daily life, but with my subjective thoughts & feelings gleaned, then noted, whilst living my midwest suburban life.

Thoughts that I hope are not stupid, tedious, or pedantic.

Because those, my little moonbeams, are my nagging fears as a personal blogger who’s been writing a blog for decades now— and who would have thought I’d have lasted this long‽

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

If you write a personal blog, do you generally favor a plot-driven or character-driven approach to your blog?

How do you decide what you’ll write about next?

What worries you about how your blog posts will be received? Do you have any small nagging fears like I do? Or maybe some large ones I haven’t thought of?

Any other questions you’d like to ask me about personal blogging?

~ ~ 🔹 ~ ~

The One About Affirmations & Allergies & Assertiveness, Oh My!

April 2, 2025 / Ally Bean / 211 Comments

The Affirmation Part

As I’m sure you realize, my little cherry blossoms of joy, there’s a difference between quotes and affirmations.

Quotes are thoughts said by someone. Ideally a quote, when properly sourced, is from an authority— maybe a person like a novelist or poet or songwriter OR from a well-known book or movie or TV show. When examined in their context quotes add depth to your thinking, speaking, writing.

Affirmations on the other hand are sayings that provide generic emotional support or encouragement. They tend to be popular ideas, often reflecting the existential angst of the era in which the affirmation originates. While an affirmation may be motivating for one person, it could just as easily be dismissed as poppycock by another person.

So keeping the foregoing in mind I share an affirmation that dropped into my sneezy life as I was scrolling along the interwebs. It stopped me long enough for me to muse upon its meaning | wisdom | value.

And how it could be a reflection of the times in which we live. The need to feel some control over something is powerful in the best of times and doubly so in our socially-mediated times. Maybe more so than in the past.

N’est-ce pas?

The Allergy Part

Without a second thought I can tell you the 3 months I like the best: October [at the top] – May – January. Then there are six other months I’m indifferent to, followed by the 3 months I dislike the most: February – August – April [at the bottom].

I apologize to people with April birthdays and wedding anniversaries, but for me April is a lousy month. This is because of ALLERGIES.

You see, I suffer from what the allergy doctors refer to as Rose Fever, the springtime equivalent to late summer’s Hay Fever [which I also suffer from]. While Hay Fever makes me tired, Rose Fever makes me irritable & leaves me feeling churlish.

It aggravates me in ways that fuel my natural penchant for being snarky, which I admit may work to my benefit. People tell me it’s my sassiness that draws them to this blog.

Thus this is where I find myself today, a woman muttering about her drippy nose, eyes that won’t focus, itchy skin, a mild never-ending headache, and the ability to sneeze loudly enough to startle Z-D when I’m downstairs and he’s upstairs on the other side of the house.

True story, really happened!

The Assertiveness Part

While researching something unrelated to that which follows I stumbled over another interesting online test that I had to take. I have a thing for them and from what I can tell so do my bloggy friends.

I realize I’ve been known to say that I believe life is one big ole test with a few pop quizzes along the way. I was being figurative but maybe for me it’s a literal thing.

Anyhoo I took the simple + fast Psychology Today’s Assertiveness Test that helps you determine how confident | bold | decisive you are.

From my results I learned that on a scale of 0 to 100 I rate 73. This puts me in the Somewhat Assertive range which means I’m an “effective communicator” who respects other people.

It also confirmed that I know that my “thoughts and feelings have value.”

Since becoming an adult I doubt there has rarely been a time when I didn’t know that my thoughts and feelings had value, but it’s good to have outside confirmation.

I guess…