In Which The Hubster Scares The Bejeezus Out Of Me, Not Once, But Twice

[Subtitled: What Comes Around Goes Around, Dear]

•  Zen-Den and I worked outside in the yard this weekend.  We also cleaned the screens and put them into 20+ windows.  Then we washed and repainted portions of the screened-in porch.  In between doing all that, we shopped for deck and patio furniture in brick-&-mortar stores and online.

We were busy, and I was exhausted by bedtime.  So exhausted, in fact, that after I got ready for bed and sat down on the edge of our bed, I forgot to lie down to go to sleep.  Really.  I just sat there.

So Zen-Den, who was already in bed, said real sweetly: “Don’t you want to lie down now?  You’ll sleep better.”

My addled brain liked that idea so I just leaned over, eyes shut, ready to plop myself down on my comfy pillow.  But Mr. Shenanigans pulled my pillow away from my side of the bed just as my weary self went thunk.  And suddenly, realizing that something was very wrong, I bounced right out of bed– wide awake.

And what do I see?  The Hubster holding my pillow and laughing his fool head off.  Because it was just. that. funny. to him to see me go from dead tired to live wire in a nanosecond.

Oh, yea!  He’s a card… must be from St. Louis…

•  I slept in this morning— didn’t even hear the alarm go off.  It’s no big deal because today my schedule is very flexible– I’ll get to where I need to go when I get there.  And all will be well with the world.

However, Z-D must have gotten up very early– and on his way out the door he must have put a load of laundry into the washing machine.  Then not wanting to wake me, he must have started the machine using its timer function.  Meaning that one hour later the washer automatically turned itself on.

Or at least I’m hoping that is what he did… because no one left me a note telling me to expect a very loud machine with a tendency to clunk to start. working. spontaneously. when I was sitting in the soothing early morning quiet sipping my coffee.

Which it turns out I don’t need to help me wake up when a loud unidentified sound comes from the laundry room– and causes my system to produce enough adrenaline to keep me alert for– oh, I don’t know— years.

Thanks, honey.  You’re a dork peach.

Orange You Glad To See Me?

Every morning Zen-Den gets into Bullwinkle, his 12-year-old Lexus SUV, and drives downtown to go to work.  I wave goodbye from our doorstep with a mug of coffee in my hand– and a prayer of gratitude in my heart that he deals with traffic & office politics for both of us.

And me?  What do I do then?  Well, I go back inside the house, take care of the homestead, and write to my heart’s content.  Great job if you can get it.

HOWEVER, on occasion I do venture out of the house and wander around out there in the world.  And often times– well, most times— I don’t tell Z-D what I’m doing because, quite frankly, he doesn’t care about the minutiae of my daily life.  Nor should he.

So yesterday as I was pulling into a parking lot in front of a store I suddenly remembered that Z-D had told me that morning that he’d be out of the office– and in this particular part of town later in the day.  Which made me wonder if he’d parked in this lot, too.

After a bit of driving up and down the rows, I found The ‘Winkle parked by an empty spot in the lot.  Naturally I parked my car in that empty spot.  And then I looked around to find a piece of paper to leave a note on Bullwinkle for Z-D.  But, alas and alack, I had no paper in the car or in my purse.

[A Digression: How could that possibly happen?  Am I not the child of a compulsive note taker & a dedicated list maker?  This, my gentle readers, is an oversight on my part that is causing my parents to roll in their graves.  You mark my words.  Rolling.]

The only thing that I could find to write on in the car was a magazine insert.  You know, one of those annoying rectangles of advertising gibberish that fall out of all magazines.  So, reluctantly, I used it to write a short hi! note to Zen-Den.  Then, with it in hand, I got out of my car.

But the good Lord provides, doesn’t He?  Oh. Yes. He. Does.

And what did my eyes spy as I got out of my car?  I saw, almost under Bullwinkle’s back tire, an orange.  A bright, lovely piece of not-quite-rotten fruit that had rolled out of someone else’s car– and had come to a stop by The ‘Winkle.  So I picked it up, examined it for icky-ness, decided that it was serviceable as a fun addition to my note, and laid it against Bullwinkle’s windshield where Z-D would see it when he got into the SUV.  No missing it.

Then I quickly re-worded my note on the magazine insert by adding a bad pun– and a warning to not eat the fruit because I’d found it on the ground.  I secured the note under Bullwinkle’s windshield wiper blade and walked away from the scene.

CLEARLY, all that was left for me to do was to go about my day and wait to hear from the Hubster… which I knew that I would eventually.  In fact, about an hour later he phoned to congratulate me on getting his attention, to thank me for my gift of found fruit– and to ask what I was doing in that part of town.

And that, kids, is how Zen-Den and I roll here in the ‘burbs.  With mushy fruit and hasty messages.  Making the best of any situation and adding a few laughs along the way.

Good life, this one.  Orange Aren’t you glad to know me?

It Was Quite An Experience, But The Results Are Wonderful

Here’s a photo update of our landscape project that I named, The Big Dig.  Simply put: late last summer & early fall we had a portion of our wooded backyard transformed into a terraced sitting area.  This project was messy + stressful + expensive.

[Want to know more about The Big Dig?  For a bit of background information, start here: Talking Dirt.  For photos and explanation of the process, go here: We’re Investing In Dirt.  Then here: A Garden Wall Worthy Of Fred & Wilma.  And then finally, here: We Have A Backyard.]

Because the weather last fall was so wet and ridiculous, the landscapers were never able to completely finish the project.  So last week they returned for 3 days to finish edging and mulching around The Big Dig.  And, damn, does it look wonderful.

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{ view from deck }

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{ steps from the deck to the yard }

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{ new backyard area under trees }

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{ standing in new backyard area looking over toward terraced area }

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{ standing in the yard looking at the new terraced area }

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{ signs of things to come }

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The First Conversation Of The Day

•  Here’s what I said to Zen-Den first thing this morning:

“What do you want to do… oh never mind, we can’t do that.”

•  Here’s what I was thinking as I said what I said:

“What do you want to do…

…it’s cold outside this morning, we should make waffles… yeah waffles… oh no, we don’t have any whole wheat flour or buttermilk to make Alton Brown‘s basic waffles… phooey… hey wait a minute, we could make those cornmeal waffles that are so good with maple syrup on them… yeah waffles… wait… i used all the cornmeal last week to make cornbread to go with the chili… humph… i really need to put those items on the grocery list…

oh never mind, we can’t do that.”

•  Here’s what he said to me upon hearing my statement:

“Of course.”

•  And then here is what he did– and has continued to do off and on for the last three hours.  He stepped away from me as if he was on stage, and started singing/dancing/arm moving to the Backstreet Boys classic hit, “I Want It That Way.” Except that he changed the words to:

“I WANT IT YOUR WAY.”

•  And here is what I’m thinking:

Great idea.  But could you lose the bad singing, goofy dancing and ridiculous arm gestures when saying it.  It’d make me think that you were more sincere– and really meant what you are saying!