Answering Your Questions, I Am [Part 1 of 2]

•  From Kate at Views and Mews by Coffee Cat… Describe your dream vacation and besides Zen-Den, is there someone you would like to share it with?

My dream vacation would be going to Australia, New Zealand & Viet Nam.  In Australia, I’d like to see a few major cities, the ocean reef and some of the outback.  In New Zealand, I’d like to see the villages, the sheep and Christ Church, which years ago I remember being dubbed as the friendliest city on earth.  And as for Viet Nam, friends have been there and thought it was amazing to see and to experience and to give perspective on the 1960s.

Along with Z-D, I’d share this vacation with friends of ours, J & E.  They are easy to travel with and enjoy tangents.  Plus they make me laugh like no one’s business so no matter what happened, we’d have a good time.

•  From Beth who I’ve known since 7th grade… What is one great childhood memory of yours? 

I remember hot, humid summers with no air conditioning.  At night, my Mom and Dad and I would hang out on the cool concrete patio at the back of the house.  It was the only place with a bit of breeze and a few lawn chairs.  While they’d be drinking an adult beverage (or two) I’d be playing on my swing set in the yard or coloring with chalk on the patio.  Or, if it was past dark, I’d be catching fireflies to put into an empty glass jar– as my parents cheered me on from their chairs.

Time stood still on those nights.  Nowhere to go.  No wish to be inside the house watching TV.  No rush to get to bed because it wasn’t a school night.  Just hanging out because we wanted to be together.

•  From Margaret at Stargazer… Why do you live where you live and what do you like best/least about it?

The simple answer is we live here because this is where Z-D found a job.  The more intriguing answer is that, although neither one of us ever wanted to live here, fate intervened.  You see, 16 years ago Z-D & I both were unhappy with our jobs, so we both quit them and lived off our savings for a year.  When we started our year off, we figured that after it we’d be moving away from here.  So during our year off we travelled around the USA looking at places we’d like to live–  keeping notes, making contacts, checking out real estate, planning our future.

However, when Z-D started sending out resumes looking for employment, the most amazing thing happened.  A company here offered him the chance to start a department, from scratch, in his favorite area of expertise.  So despite not liking the conservative, non-friendly nature of this area, we stayed.  And that’s how we ended up living here.

•  From Cheri at Naples Girl Blog… If you won the lotto, what would you do with the money? Would your lifestyle change?

If I won the lotto, I imagine that my personality wouldn’t change.  I mean that in the sense of what I’d buy or how I’d go about doing things or how I’d relate to people or what I’d give to the world.

I think that the biggest change would be in my lifestyle.  That is, I’d buy a few pieces of property around the USA.  Like a condo in downtown Chicago, perhaps.  Or a small cottage near a lake or an ocean.  Maybe an apartment in Santa Fe.  Then when suburban life bored me to tears I’d head to one of my other places to live for a few weeks or months.  I’d have lots of homes, not just one– but live the same way that I do now in each of them.

[Tomorrow, Part 2]

Confounded By Group Photos

“Time can change me, But I can’t trace time.”

~ David Bowie

# # #

A few months ago I was talking on the phone with a friend who happens to be in her eighties.  She is a delight– mentally with it + honest to a fault.  In other words, exactly who I want to be when I get to be an eightysomething.

In our conversation my friend mentioned that her granddaughter had emailed her some photos of herself with her friends.  The young women had gotten dressed up and gone out to brunch together somewhere pricey.  The photo of was of all of them in front of the restaurant.

# # #

I asked my friend how her granddaughter looked in the photo and my friend said: “Cute, I guess.  All the girls look alike to me, so I can’t tell which one she is.  They all have long, stringy hair and carry huge purses.  I think that my granddaughter is one of them.”

As we talked a bit more about kids.these.days. I chuckled to myself about me humoring a delightful older woman who was clearly confused by the obvious.  I mean, how could she not know which girl was her granddaughter?  Really.

# # #

A younger friend of mine, who is not on Twitter, has a high school daughter, who is on Twitter.  And as you know, I’m on Twitter.  So, every once in a while I check to see what my friend’s daughter is doing on Twitter.

What I have discovered is that this girl is a good kid.  She has pleasant friends, likes ice cream, doesn’t like schoolwork, likes sports, goes on dates.  Nothing scathing at all– unless you consider a few swear words once in a while to be trouble.  Which I don’t.

# # #

One day last week I was glancing at the photos that my friend’s daughter had added to her Twitter feed and I saw a group shot of a bunch of teenage girls.  They were all wearing skinny jeans and white t-shirts and pumps with 4″ heels.  And I thought: “What a cute photo.  I wonder which one is my friend’s daughter?  They all look alike.”  

Then it hit me. *BAM*  I had just said exactly what my older friend said about her granddaughter and her friends.  And I realized that I had morphed into an old woman who couldn’t distinguish one child from another.  

# # #

This means, of course, that now I must admit to my younger friend that I can’t recognize her daughter in the photo.  I can’t help but wonder if my friend will politely listen to me on the phone while chuckling to herself about humoring me, a delightful older woman who is clearly confused by the obvious.  I mean, I would understand where she was coming from… as I was in that same situation only a few short months ago.

Oh yeah.  Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes.

# # #

The One With Ally’s Weird Dream

~ • ~

First, I’ll tell you about the dream: 

driving in my white coupe down road in flat farm country where I grew up – get behind slow-moving gray van – pass on the left but van pushes me off the road into corn field – drive safely through field and get back on road in front of van – once in front of van my car turns into my blue bike from when I was a girl – ride bike to lowest level of parking garage at a mall near where I live now – lock bike on bike rack – rearrange all of my stuff into bags so that it is comfortable for me to carry – Abby Sciuto [of NCIS] looks on as I do this – then off we go together to shop upstairs in the mall

Then, I’ll explain the weird part: 

In the dream I lock my bike using my girlhood yellow bike lock.  When I first look at the lock I’m dismayed because I don’t know the combination, but then I think about it– and remember the lock combination.  For real. In my dream. The actual lock combination for a lock that I haven’t used in decades. 

Finally, I’ll hypothesize about what this dream might mean: 

  • I’ve flipped for sure this time.
  • My subconscious is telling me that I’ve unlocked something [important?] from my past.
  • I need to stop watching NCIS before I go to sleep.
  • My subconscious is telling me that I’m all organized now, so it is time for me to move on.
  • On the roadways of life, small & determined  [my coupe] trumps large & in the way [the van].
  • My subconscious is telling me that it’s time for me to start exercising more.
  • I’m way cooler in my dreams than I am in real life.

Because We Are Just That Exciting, We Went On A Date

On Thursday I got home late in the afternoon and saw that there was a message on the answering machine from Z-D.  This struck me as odd because I had my cell phone with me and if he really wanted/needed to get hold of me STAT he’d use that method.

So I listened to the message, wondering what was up.  As I did not just fall off the new wife-y turnip truck, I figured that there was something going on that was a bit wonky.  And I was right.

• • •

First: He said, “I have an idea– let’s go out on a date tonight.”

[ME, suspicious:  Hmmm.]

Next: He told me his date night plan.  He wanted us to drive to a town about an hour away & pick up some sandwiches at a local grocery store that has a deli sandwich counter inside it.

[ME, with raised eyebrow:  Okay, maybe.]

Then: He told me that he wanted us to go sit in a parking lot to watch some lights in the parking lot come on.

[ME, stunned:  Do what?!  That’s a date???]

Finally: He said, “I’ll pick you up at home in about an hour or so.  See ‘ya soon.  ‘Bye.”

[ME, shouting at the phone machine:  That’s not a date.  That’s something you have to do for work, isn’t it?]

• • •

And you know as I stood there staring at the answering machine I had three thoughts.  Simultaneously.  Before the machine even turned itself off.

  • My God we are old if this is his idea of a date.  Honest to Pete, watch lights come on?!!  What kind of date is that?
  • Rather clever of me to know that there was something up with this message before I heard it.  I’m getting good at this marriage thing.  Yeah me!
  • Well– phooey, I don’t have a thing planned for this evening and those sandwiches are yummy, so I guess that I’ll go out with him.  Might be kind of fun.

… and you know what?  It was.