And The Award For The Best Sales Pitch By A Kid At The Front Door Goes To…

LATE AFTERNOON ON A SUNDAY, the doorbell rang.

I answered the door to see a tall skinny kid, who probably eats 4,000 calories a day and is still hungry, standing on my stoop.

He was wearing his scout uniform with shorts, looked to be about 15, and was holding a clipboard horizontally [landscape style] in front of him.

In the metal clip on his clipboard he had put a pen so that the pen protruded toward me, allowing me easy access to the pen.  Clipped to the board itself was an official Boy Scouts of America order form.

He said nothing, but his brown eyes, made large by his glasses with farsighted-lenses, showed me that he was alert.

And clever.

# # #

OVER THE YEARS I’VE LEARNED that neighbor kids selling things will just stand there at the front door if I don’t get the conversation rolling, so I said: “hello.”

To which he said: “POPCORN.”

And that is all he said.

There was no involved introduction. There was no needless chatting. There was no coy sales banter.

There was just a kid, probably an introvert forced to sell something that he has no interest in selling, standing in front of me.

I immediately loved this kid and his direct sales approach, so guess what I did?

I said: “ok.”  And grabbed the pen and clipboard so that I could order popcorn.

Lots of it.

Because, as you my gentle readers will understand, I’m easily charmed by a no-nonsense man with knobby knees in a uniform.

# # #

screen-shot-2016-10-02-at-2-45-25-pm

{ source }

I’m Where I Belong As Autumn Begins. And You?

screen-shot-2016-08-18-at-12-32-35-pm

Take the “What State Do You Actually Belong In” quiz. Find out, for sure, where you belong. In case you’re unclear about this. Or you’re just looking for something to do. Which is how I stumbled upon this quiz. Which turned out to be spot on.

• • •

I’ve often thought that if you don’t like autumn around here, then there’s something dead in your soul.

I can understand not liking our gray, snowy winters. They are dreary and can sap your soul, requiring a certain kind of physical and mental strength that not everyone has.

That some years I don’t have. No problem, there. That I get.

But to not like fall here in Ohio?

That seems most peculiar to me, oh Autumn-haters.

• • •

img_0036Here’s what I mean.

Autumn is just beginning around here and already the weather has turned cooler, dropping into the 50s at night, and the humidity is gone.  I’m sleeping more soundly at night, windows open, and am wearing sweaters, or fleece, during the day.

A more alert me, and you, is good.

The leaves on the trees and bushes have yet to turn colors, but each day a few leaves fall onto the ground, a precursor of what is to come: bold colors, naked trees and clear blue skies by day + dark starry skies by night.

img_0035This will be good, just wait and see.

And what about the fact that fall ushers in HallowThanksMasNewYear, a time of endless candy, cookies, costumes, outfits, and decorations?  Hmmm?  Had you thought of that, oh Autumn-haters?

Sweetness and sparkle is good for all of us.

• • •

Obviously if you, oh Autumn-haters, insist on not liking this season, despite my thrown together well-reasoned and quickly written impassioned entreaty to change your mind, I will let it go.

Which, I do believe, now that I think about it, is the subtext of this entire season.

Don’t ‘ya know?  😉

• • •

Disliked While Waiting In The Doctor’s Office

I dunno. This is a weird one…

dscn7707

• • •

LATE LAST WEEK I WAS sitting in my PCP’s waiting room.  I was there for my annual check-up.

I had on my basic summer look: v-neck short sleeve t-shirt, bermuda shorts, leather sandals.  Curly hair pulled back with two barrettes. Hoop earrings. Recent pedicure. Nice purse. Rimless glasses.

And I was reading a book, a mystery.

Another patient, a conservatively dressed 40-something woman, checked-in at the reception desk, then walked by me to sit directly across from me.

As she went by I moved my feet under my seat so that she wouldn’t trip.  This movement, which people generally acknowledge with a tip of their head or a thank you, earned me a glare.

• • •

BUT IT DIDN’T END THERE.

After this woman, who had long straight hair and was wearing a long skirt, long-sleeved cotton blouse buttoned up to her neck and ballet flats got settled into her seat, she continued to glare at me, looking me up and down.

I began to wonder what she was seeing when she looked at me:

  • A wanton harlot with bright red toenail polish?
  • A stoned hippy wearing Birkenstocks?
  • A liberal feminist reading, of all things, a novel? 

I smiled back at her, as polite people do, then went back to reading my book.

• • •

SHORTLY THEREAFTER HER NAME WAS called, and because of the waiting room chair configuration, she had to walk by me again.

This time she glared + snorted derisively as she walked by me;  she needed for me to know that she didn’t approve of me.

For some reason. Nonspecific.

[Another patient across the way, a woman dressed about like I was, rolled her eyes and grinned at me as it happened.]

• • •

NOW OBVIOUSLY I’M NOT LOOKING for validation from strangers who I encounter in my daily life, but the fact that something about me really irritated this conservative woman fascinated me.

And truth be told, I was equally fascinated by the fact that I rather enjoyed the sense of power it gave me over her.

I mean, if I can bother someone by merely existing in their view, imagine what I can do when I decide to speak.  😉

• • •

Question of the Day: 

Have you ever found yourself on the receiving end of a stranger’s hateful stare for reasons you could not figure out? And if so, how did it make you feel?  

• • •

Living The Dream, Going Through The Car Wash

dscn7573

They say “dream big,” but I’m a bit of a contrarian on this point.

dscn7541

You see, I’m blessed with a temperament that enjoys silliness…

dscn7553

and tends to focus on the details of life.

dscn7574

As a result, many of my dreams are small…

dscn7554

like sitting in the car as the car goes through the car wash and taking photos of the process.

dscn7564

And do you know what’s the best part of this small dream?

dscn7572

The fact that it came true.