Humor

I’m Beginning To Think That I Like Pink

/ Ally Bean / 21 Comments

If you were to ask me if I liked pink, I’d tell you that I did not.

However, the other day when Greg, the landscaper, was here chatting with me about our next big project, he started talking about color.  He was taking notes about my vague ideas about what I wanted him to do next in the flower beds out front along the sidewalk leading up to the front door.

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He asked me what colors I wanted to see along there.  I told him no pink.

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Being the polite sort of man that he is, he merely raised one eyebrow and tilted his head in about five different directions.  My eyes followed where he was subtly pointing.

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And what did I see?  Oh pots & pots of pink flowers and many pink rose bushes.  All over the property.  Uh huh.

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After I stopped laughing at myself, I looked over at him.  He said nothing but held up his pad of paper on which he’d written one word.  In very large letters.  And the word was: PINK.  The color that we’ll be seeing along the front sidewalk.

The color that, apparently, I like.

Revenge, I Now Know, Is Lime Green

/ Ally Bean / 27 Comments

A few years ago I attended a good-bye party for a woman who lived across the street.  At this party were other neighbors who I met for the first time.  One was a nice woman who, until not too long ago, lived up the street.

During the party this woman got talking about her husband who feared color.  She told me that he would only allow her to have pure white walls and trim in their house.

Fear?  Allow?  Say what?!  What decade is this?

Naturally I was curious.  So I asked her how fear of color manifested.  I mean, I dislike certain shades of color but I do not fear them.  They are not my enemies.  I do not cower in their presence.

She told me that for her husband seeing anything that wasn’t uniform made him uneasy– so much so that different shades of any color, including white, were anxiety producing for him.  She also said that they had nothing hanging on the walls because that made him crazy, too.

I asked her if she, too, feared color.  But she didn’t.  In fact, she volunteered that she liked all colors a lot.

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Fast forward to a few weeks ago when I was out for a walk and saw a For Sale sign in the front yard of this couple’s house.

Not surprisingly, they had divorced.

She had kept the house for a while after the divorce, but now had put the property on the market using a realtor who always puts photos from inside the house on the For Sale sign outside the house.

When I got a close-up of the For Sale sign I almost couldn’t stop laughing.  On the sign was one large photo of the interior of this modern, open-concept house which features 14′ cathedral ceilings on the first floor.

And what color were these large dramatic walls inside this house?  They were a shade of citrus-y lime green so glaringly bright that parrots would look pale standing near them.  Bold + loud.  A decidedly in-your-face color.

Yes, that’s the color that this newly divorced woman painted the walls after all those years of living with a color-phobic husband.  And, damn, do those walls look good.  Finally.

Way to make a statement, girlfriend.  Way to go.  😉

Call Me!

/ Ally Bean / 19 Comments

This June my desk calendar’s picture is an old advertisement for a 1959 Princess Telephone.  The phone is that unique shade of turquoise that was so popular in the 1950s.  Tres chic!

I have no personal recollection of Princess Telephones [Model 702].  We didn’t have one in our home.  Instead, we had a basic white rotary dial Desk Telephone [Model 500] in the kitchen + a yellow Trimline Telephone [Model 220] in my upstairs bedroom.

Yes, we were early adopters with two phones in our small house.  Try not to be jealous.

Even though the following short TV commercial is from the 1950s, I can’t help feeling that I, too, was just as much of a princess as this girl.  I mean, I had a “personal extension phone” in my upstairs bedroom.

On the other hand, I didn’t have a dressing table adorned with bottles of nail polish and a French poodle figurine… nor was I ever inclined to wear bobby socks with a skirt… nor, after years of painful orthodontia, were my teeth as crooked as the girl’s teeth in this commercial…

But other than that, I was just like her.  Yakking on the phone.  Up in my bedroom.  In my own little teenage world.  😉

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So how about you?  

Did you have a Princess Telephone?  Or a Trimline Telephone?  

Or some other sort of phone entirely?

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[For photos and descriptions of models mentioned above please go here: Western Electric ~ A look at the evolution of the Dial Telephone.]

[FYI – Phone numbers used to be recited with words at the beginning.  Here’s a chart to help you remember, or understand, what those words meant: Ma Bell’s Officially Recommended Exchange Names.]

In Which I Staycate & You Questionate

/ Ally Bean / 11 Comments

This week Zen-Den and I are taking a staycation.

We are planning on doing projects around the house [paint stair railings + bannister] and around the yard [replace perennials that didn’t survive the winter].  Plus we hope to go out to eat a few times… maybe go to the zoo… perhaps check-out the deals at an outlet mall… see a movie.

You know, do stuff.

So this week instead of writing about anything in particular, I thought that like Carol Burnett I’d turn up the house lights and take questions from the audience.  Then next week, on a subsequent post, I’ll answer your questions making sure to let the world know who asked me each question.

Deal?  Okay then, let’s get things started in here.

Just remember that the success or failure of my next post rests on you, my gentle readers.  I’m counting on you to questionate like a pro!  Please leave your questions in the comments below.  And thank you in advance for your kind attention to this matter.

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Updated late in the afternoon to include…

HEY! Look at this:

“Carol Burnett, who became famous for playing a variety of characters in sketch comedy routines on her namesake television show, was named the winner of the nation’s top humor prize on Tuesday.

The Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts said Burnett will receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor on Oct. 20 in Washington. “

AND WHO POSTED ABOUT CAROL BURNETT TODAY BEFORE THIS PRIZE WAS ANNOUNCED?  Could it be me?  Why yes it was.  Is that a trippy coincidence or what?

[Source article here.]