A Nobody Shops For Jammies

October 25, 2016 / Ally Bean / 52 Comments

A few doors down from Ulta, which I adore, is a Soma. I was in Ulta and on a whim, being in a good mood, I walked over to Soma.

They sell bras + undies plus PJs. I thought that I might treat myself to some new pajamas.

I got the idea of indulging in new PJs after talking with some friends about how we adore cotton flannel jammies, the epitome of autumn/winter comfort and practicality.

Not to mention, flannel jammies are classic.

Timeless… or so you’d think.

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I walked into Soma, intent on buying some PJs, but when I noticed lots of gorgeous bras + undies I thought to myself: “I think I’ll get some of these, too, while I’m in here. I deserve to upgrade my unmentionables.”

My mind was in a happy place, giddy with possibility.

Eventually one of the employees came over to wait on me. I asked her if they had any 100% cotton or mostly cotton PJs, summer or winter, I didn’t care which season.

With a dismissive laugh she told me that: “No, we don’t carry things like that. NOBODY WANTS COTTON PAJAMAS!”

[Considering that I was SOMEBODY standing in front of her this statement was factually incorrect. But out of the largesse of my heart I chose to not mention this lapse in logic to her.]

Ignoring her attitude I told her that my friends and I liked cotton flannel jammies, and suggested that: “I’m sure there are lots of woman who want 100% cotton pajamas. I think that my friends and I are the norm.”

Could be wrong, but kinda think I’m not.

# # #

She shrugged, indifferent to me, the NOBODY standing in front of her, and started to wander away from me. As she turned her back on me I told her: “Tell the corporate people that we want 100% cotton PJs. You got that?”

She just walked away from me, without a word.

No apology for not having what I, the ~~customer~~ nobody, wanted. No sympathy for what I was asking for. No suggestion of where I might go to buy what I wanted.

No indication that she cared in the least [because she didn’t].

Now you’d think I’d be mad about this, wouldn’t you, my gentle readers? But really, can you blame her for behaving this way?

After all, I was, quite obviously, a NOBODY.

Grateful For Smiles, Three Unexpected Things

October 20, 2016August 28, 2018 / Ally Bean / 39 Comments

THING ONE: Looking Up

Our local Kroger is undergoing a remodel that started in April. Since about day 1 this upside down wheelbarrow has been on the roof, not moving, just sitting up there. While the unexpected wheelbarrow placement is a charming bit of whimsy, every time I see it I chuckle to myself wondering if anyone doing the remodel remembers that it’s up there.

Care to place a bet as to when [if] it ever comes down?

~ • ~

THING TWO: Looking Forward

Shopping in Half Price Books I noticed that the clever employees have quietly moved all the books by and about Hillary Clinton off the “First Ladies” shelves to the nearby “Presidents” shelves. This might be presumptuous OR it might be prophetic, but it is, if nothing else, an unexpected bit of humor.

Good people in that store. I like how they think.

~ • ~

THING THREE: Looking Around

Fuzzy the Squirrel, who hangs out around our house, has found a new, unexpected way to entertain [annoy?] me. For the first time he’s leaving nut shells all over any concrete or stone surface in front of the house. Meaning that when I want to get the mail I have dodge sharp nut shells as I walk to the mailbox OR use a broom to sweep the shells away as I walk along.

Sure, he’s cute, but oh. so. bothersome.

~ • ~

{ This post, inspired by Nerd in the Brain‘s Three Things Thursday, is part of a weekly blogging event dedicated to the idea that gratitude is awesome and leads to smiles. You can join in too. Go here to learn more. }

Antiques + Ghosts: There’s Something Off-Key Here

July 14, 2016July 14, 2016 / Ally Bean / 42 Comments

A real-life honest-to-goodness made-me-smile conversation…

{ source }

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“I ain’t afraid of no ghost.”

I met a friend for drinks and dinner. She got talking about her part-time business, which is selling antiques.

She scouts around local Goodwills and garage sales, then takes her finds, tidies them up a bit, and puts them in a rented booth in an antique mall. She’s done this for years, turning a modest profit on her efforts.

My friend told me that a ghost is now haunting her booth. This ghost, who isn’t pleased with the way my friend is merchandising her hats and jewelry, moves items around within the booth.

And the ghost has gone so far as to break an item. Bad ghost!

Come to find out this problem is part of dealing in antiques. [Read more here.] According to my friend you learn to accept the fact that as long as you have an item a ghost has attached itself to, you’re going to have difficulties.

Once the item is gone, either through a sale or by intentional destruction, the ghost leaves you alone.

The trick, of course, is figuring out which item is the one that has brought the ghost to your booth.

So far my friend has not been able to do this on her own, so she’s enlisted the help of other antique booth renters, asking them to keep an eye on her things, in case they see a ghost lurking about.

As one is wont to do, apparently, in antique malls.

Who knew?

~ ~ • ~ ~

An entertaining ditty for your listening pleasure!

In Which We Get New Outdoor Furniture & Ally Embraces Social Media, Part 2 of 2

May 11, 2016January 25, 2024 / Ally Bean / 61 Comments

{Sub-titled: Nothing Is Ever Easy, But Darn This Furniture Is Pretty}

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YESTERDAY ON AS THE ~~WORLD~~ BEAN TURNS…

We left the Beans longing for Carton 2 of 6, unable to determine where it was, or when it might appear at the house.

What will happen next?

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THURSDAY, Day 12 – After posting the above tweet the night before, Ally receives helpful early morning tweet from reputable catalog company asking her to phone them. This pleases Ally, but being an introvert she passes message on to husband to deal with.

Around 11:00 a.m. Ally, sitting in her home office, hears thunk of carton as someone drops off Carton 2 of 6 by the garage door.

No one appears at front door, so no one signs for anything.

FRIDAY, Day 13 – Ally, who had the audacity to leave her house, returns home to find a message on the answering machine from Important Office Guy at reputable catalog company. He is apologizing for the delay and explaining how on the following Monday she’ll receive the cushions lost in transit.

Except the cushions are no longer lost.

Again, Ally the introvert, forces Zen-Den, Esq., to deal with this. And he does, calling Important Office Guy to tell him that all is well here.

We. Are. Happy.

This would be the end of it all, or so you would hope…

WEDNESDAY, Day 18 – Around 8:00 a.m. Ally receives phone call from Worried Manager Guy of the third-party delivery service. He needs her to sign for Carton 2 of 6. Without her signature, reputable catalog company will not pay third-party delivery service.

This situation does not make Worried Manager Guy happy. He asks if one of his drivers could come by the house at 11:00 a.m. for her to sign for Carton 2 of 6.

Ally, who can’t think of a reason why not, figures that’d be ok.

At 8:50 a.m. the doorbell rings and Ally finds Truck Guy from third-party delivery service standing on her stoop, proving that when it behooves them, third-party delivery service can find her home lickety-split.

Truck Guy has packing slip [sans clipboard] + pen for Ally to use to sign piece of paper that confirms Ally did, in the end, after 18 days of messing around with reputable catalog company, and their chosen third-party delivery service, get all of her pretty wicker furniture with cushions.

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THUS ENDETH THE STORY.

Unless, of course, someone realizes that no one signed for the ottoman and cushion, in which case, there will be a sequel to this story.

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