H Is For Hotcakes, Happening Here Now

April 9, 2016May 6, 2021 / Ally Bean / 51 Comments

Selling like hotcakes

… refers to brisk sales of a specific item. It’s one of those charmingly innocent idioms that I use from time-to-time when the situation demands that I be charmingly innocent.

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I cannot make hotcakes, or griddlecakes, or flapjacks, or pancakes as we call them.

It turns out that I lack the patience, coordination, and mathematical aptitude needed to create a flat pancake. My pancakes get all scrunched up, don’t flip over properly, and then cook unevenly.

{Image Source }

It’s tragic.

Zen-Den, however, has a gift for making hotcakes, which, by default, puts him in charge of all pancake projects. It’s a burden he’s happy to bear, because– pancakes. Yum.

Why am I telling you this?

Here’s why.

I have a theory that every person who likes to cook has one food that he or she just. can. not. make. It’s one food that everyone else throws together as if it’s nothing.

It’s a food that has the power to aggravate with the mere mention of the word. And for me that food is hotcakes.

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So, my gentle readers, what food can you absolutely not make no matter how much you try to do so?

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A Is For Artichoke, A Good Place To Begin

April 1, 2016May 6, 2021 / Ally Bean / 25 Comments

Okie-dokie, artichokie

… is a slang phrase that I’m guessing everyone has heard, read, or said. It’s one of those goofy ways to communicate agreement without committing to too much interest.

I use the phrase from time-to-time because there are moments when it is appropriate.

For instance, when your husband is telling you a detailed analysis of his current sock situation, and you would prefer that he get to the bottom line of this sock soliloquy, because if he wants you to buy him some more socks, just say so.

But there he is staring into his sock drawer, reflecting upon his hole-y, muddled mess-o-socks, while you stand by patiently, not caring at all about the finer nuances of his sock preferences, but pretending that it matters to you.

That’s when a wise woman says “okie-dokie, artichokie,” then goes to Kohl’s and buys him whatever socks are on sale that day.

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{ SOMETHING TO DO FOR FUN }

Take the Can You Identify These Vegetables? Quiz. Helpful hint: the first answer is artichoke.

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The First Day Of Spring: Blue, Yellow, Orange, Green

March 23, 2016July 1, 2025 / Ally Bean / 39 Comments

The skies were unbelievably clear on Sunday morning. Memorable, even. The colors of our world looked spectacular.

Because of this we decided to go for a walk around a city park.

The park was almost deserted, despite it being a beautiful day. No one else wanted to enjoy nature, I guess.

Here are few photos. Just because.

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I’ve got a busy week going on here.

I’ll end this post by wishing you, my gentle readers, a Happy Easter.

Catch up with you next week, kids.

A 3-Question Pop Quiz On Guttering & Muttering

March 15, 2016March 15, 2016 / Ally Bean / 36 Comments

Q1: What is wrong with this picture?

A. Not a thing… did I ever mention my favorite artist is Salvador Dali?

B. How clever! You’ve built a sliding board for Fuzzy the Squirrel.

C. It looks like some more of the gutter has fallen off the back of your house… AGAIN.

D. What’s wrong with this?! Every stinking thing. The end of the world is nigh.

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Q2: What caused this gutter to come undone?

A. I don’t understand the question… you know Dali painted some surreal works with absurd off-kilter angles just like this gutter.

B. A squirrel jumped up and down about a hundred thousand times on the gutter.

C. Ally Bean allowed herself to dream of buying a new laptop computer for herself, not because she needs one, but because she WANTS one.

D. What caused this to come undone?! Every stinking thing. The end of the world is nigh.

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Q3: What did Ally Bean mutter when she saw what had happened?

A. I imagine, like Salvador’s work, her words were a bizarre juxtaposition of pathos and profundity, of oddness and obviousness. A mélange of commonplace utterances and curse words.

B. Where is that damned squirrel!

C. Holy Fricking Mole-y! I gotta call Z-D, who is, of course, out-of-town on business, to tell him I’M. NOT. HAPPY.

D. What did she say?! Every stinking thing. The end of the world is nigh.

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