We Are Underlings

So, How ‘Ya Been?

/ Ally Bean / 19 Comments

When I decided to take my blogging hiatus, I thought that I’d be back to The Spectacled Bean within a few weeks.  But things happened.  Obstacles presented themselves.  And in the course of it all, I lost my blogging mojo.  

So what happened, you wonder?  Well, I think that this is one of those blogging moments when only a list can explain things.  To wit, I give you…

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THE LAMENTATIONS OF ALLY

•  Our internet connection stopped connecting.  Without going into the details, suffice to say that we are no longer using the less-than-reliable phone company for our ISP and are now using the cable company for our ISP.  And getting this worked out?  Why, it only took 55 days, during which time I couldn’t get to my blog.

•  Our kitchen sink drain pipe developed a leak that we discovered after said leak had partially destroyed the sub-flooring and was dripping into the basement.  While in and of itself this is not a reason to stop writing, it bothered me.  And a bothered Ally Bean is a scattered Ally Bean– and a scattered Ally Bean can’t focus long enough to write a list, let alone a blog post.

•  We had new carpeting installed upstairs and on the stairs, which created the most cluttered home I’ve ever lived in.  All of the upstairs stuff had to come downstairs– and then, of course, go back upstairs.  The mess was everywhere and lasted for about a month because that’s how long it took us to have the time [and energy] to move the stuff all around.  During that time I couldn’t even get to the computer which was trapped inside our home office turned storage warehouse, so no writing for me.

•  Our property was invaded by stink bugs– whose sole mission was to get inside our house.  For about 3 weeks they were all over the screens, peering into the house, just waiting for the opportunity to wander in and die.  And here is what I learned from that experience: when creepy bugs are looking for their final resting place within my home, I become unnerved and cannot write a word.  

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So that’s it from here.  It’s just the same old, same old in a whole new way.  Certainly something more interesting has been happening in your world, my gentle readers.  Spill the beans in the comment section below.  I need to know what’s up with you.

In Case You’ve Been Wondering Whether Or Not I’m A Sociopath

/ Ally Bean / 17 Comments

Going through my files I discovered the following.

Screen Shot 2013-07-11 at 1.39.53 PM

Here is The Sociopath Test that I took to determine that I am a functional member of society.

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It’s easy to make light of a test like the funny one mentioned above, but answering the questions gave me insight into what behaviors to look for when I think that I dealing with a sociopath.  They are those tedious people who only care about themselves and disregard anything you have to say.  Antisocial behavior? Yes.  No guilt about manipulating others?  Yes.  Rude, except when they want something?  You betcha.

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According to the Mayo Clinic where sociopathy is a type of antisocial personality disorder:

“Antisocial personality disorder is a type of chronic mental condition in which a person’s ways of thinking, perceiving situations and relating to others are dysfunctional — and destructive. People with antisocial personality disorder typically have no regard for right and wrong and often disregard the rights, wishes and feelings of others.”  [More here.]

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To my knowledge I don’t have any sociopaths running around in my life now.  Not to say that there haven’t been a few of them along the way– just that I gave them the boot and they are no longer invited into my happy world.

In my experience, once someone with a tendency toward this sort of anti-social, user personality knows that I will call them out on their crap, they disappear forever because the last thing they want is for someone to shine light on them.  Of course, I may have only dealt with slightly anti-social sociopaths, so my approach might not work with the really whacked, threatening ones.  Don’t know what I’d do then.

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So, my gentle readers, what do you know about sociopaths?  Are there any in your lives?  Are you, heaven forbid, one of them?  

And most importantly, what do you do when you find yourself sitting across the table from one?  Avoid interaction OR destroy on the spot?

Revenge, I Now Know, Is Lime Green

/ Ally Bean / 27 Comments

A few years ago I attended a good-bye party for a woman who lived across the street.  At this party were other neighbors who I met for the first time.  One was a nice woman who, until not too long ago, lived up the street.

During the party this woman got talking about her husband who feared color.  She told me that he would only allow her to have pure white walls and trim in their house.

Fear?  Allow?  Say what?!  What decade is this?

Naturally I was curious.  So I asked her how fear of color manifested.  I mean, I dislike certain shades of color but I do not fear them.  They are not my enemies.  I do not cower in their presence.

She told me that for her husband seeing anything that wasn’t uniform made him uneasy– so much so that different shades of any color, including white, were anxiety producing for him.  She also said that they had nothing hanging on the walls because that made him crazy, too.

I asked her if she, too, feared color.  But she didn’t.  In fact, she volunteered that she liked all colors a lot.

# # #

Fast forward to a few weeks ago when I was out for a walk and saw a For Sale sign in the front yard of this couple’s house.

Not surprisingly, they had divorced.

She had kept the house for a while after the divorce, but now had put the property on the market using a realtor who always puts photos from inside the house on the For Sale sign outside the house.

When I got a close-up of the For Sale sign I almost couldn’t stop laughing.  On the sign was one large photo of the interior of this modern, open-concept house which features 14′ cathedral ceilings on the first floor.

And what color were these large dramatic walls inside this house?  They were a shade of citrus-y lime green so glaringly bright that parrots would look pale standing near them.  Bold + loud.  A decidedly in-your-face color.

Yes, that’s the color that this newly divorced woman painted the walls after all those years of living with a color-phobic husband.  And, damn, do those walls look good.  Finally.

Way to make a statement, girlfriend.  Way to go.  😉

2 Movies, 2 Books & 1 Delightful Truth

/ Ally Bean / 26 Comments

As part of my attempt to live a more balanced life in 2013, I have given myself the assignment to watch 2 movies and to read 2 books each month.  Here is my April report.

2 Movies

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel  – Predictable + colorful.  A group of British retirees decide to move to India, embrace a new lifestyle and live in what claims to be a newly restored Indian hotel.  When they arrive, the hotel restoration is not finished, but the optimistic young man who manages the hotel tries his best to please them.  Some of the retirees adapt to India, some don’t.  The ensemble cast is delightful, the cinematography + costumes are wonderful, but there is a certain old geezer-ness to this movie that is a little monotonous.  Recommended if you like veteran actors and the idea that life is what you make of it.

The Grass Is Greener – Intriguing, albeit dated.  Because of financial problems, a British Earl and his wife [played by Cary Grant & Deborah Kerr, respectively] allow public tours of their mansion.  An American tourist [played by Robert Mitchum] falls for the wife & they have an affair.  Meanwhile, her friend [played by Jean Simmons] playfully tries to seduce the Earl.  On the surface this movie sounds trite, but the ensemble cast + witty writing make this movie entertaining.  Recommended if you enjoy 1960s style, some absurdity and learning about social mores.

2 Books

The Serpent’s Daughter [a Jade Del Cameron mystery] – Charming + clever.  Set in Tangier, Morocco, in 1920, Jade and her mother plan to go on vacation together.  However, Jade’s mother is kidnapped and Jade must find her… in time.  This mystery, by Suzanne Arruda, is campy, travelogue-y and totally fun.  Recommended if you like spunky heroines, fascinating settings and lighthearted mysteries.

A Narrative of the Life of Mrs. Mary Jemison – Amazing, but macabre.  In the 1750s during the French and Indian War in what is now western New York state, the Shawnee Indians capture a white girl and her family.  The Shawnee murder her family, but the girl goes on to live with the Seneca Indians.  She marries, has children and adopts the ways of the Indians.  When she is in her 80s she tells her story to a local white man who writes it down– in the flowery vernacular of the time.  Originally published in 1824.  Recommended if you have an interest in Colonial American History and biographies. [Free on Kindle]

1 Delightful Truth

I was surfing the web looking at design blogs, when I came upon this delightful truth by Amanda Hill.  She said: Beautiful things don’t just happen.  If you want something marvelous, you’ve got to make something marvelous.  [Punctuation added.]  

And I thought to myself: that is so true.  What good advice.  I need to take that advice to heart, henceforth.

So I have.