• • •
YEARS AGO I TOOK AN ADULT EDUCATION night class about managing your stress. The 4-part class was offered by a regional hospital and was taught by a woman with a background in massage therapy who was at that time working on a graduate degree in religious studies.
She was wise & funny. Delightful in her pragmatic approach to life.
To be clear this was not a class aimed at finding the causes of your stress or analyzing why you had this stress. It was a class based on the assumption that the sources of your stress were your own business, specific to your own life.
The class was about creating a “tool box” of positive coping behaviors; that is, by learning to breath in the moment or detach from your ego or chant a soothing mantra or acknowledge your own worth, you could deal with your stress in a healthy way.
The premise being, quite simply, that if you know how to calm down in any situation, then you’ll do better at whatever it is you’re doing.
Is this not true?
~ • 💚 • ~
ONE OF THE TOOLS I REMEMBER FROM this class was the question I posed in the title of this post. We were encouraged to think about who we were based on our own particular personality traits. [List of 600 personality traits here.]
This was trickier to do than you might think it’d be.
To wit, we were NOT describing ourselves in the sense of our relationships so saying I’m a wife, a niece, a sister-in-law was wrong. And we were NOT describing ourselves in the sense of our job titles/hobbies so saying I’m a manager, a writer, a walker was wrong.
While those descriptions of myself were accurate they weren’t the point of this mental health exercise. They were considered a distraction from understanding yourself better, a way to gloss over who you really were.
NOPE, we had to state who we were based on our own self-awareness. We had to acknowledge our individual personality traits whether they be considered a strength or a weakness, then accept the trait.
To thine own self be true, you know?
~ • 💚 • ~
I HADN’T THOUGHT ABOUT THIS CLASS IN a long time, but over the weekend I realized I was reminding myself each day to focus on three personality traits, allowing myself to feel empowered as a result of it.
I realized why I was asking myself this question and thought that maybe someone else might benefit from using this simple approach to stress management.
So in conclusion here is my answer to the question. For me, most of the time my personality traits that are helping me deal with my days during the pandemic are: 1) I’m organized, 2) I’m creative, and 3) I’m perceptive.
• • •
What about you, kids? Care to share which three personality traits are helping you stay above the fray, cool in every way? Or if not cool, at least sane for most of the day?
• • •
Interesting, Allie. I would have used the same 3 traits to describe myself. In the past 4 weeks of isolation, I’ve dipped deeply into the Creativity box to keep me amused and all my mental cylinders firing.
At a time like this, it’s easy to feel like we have no control, but in fact we do. It’s just a question of how we choose to exercise it.
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Joanne, I like how you said: keep me amused and all my mental cylinders firing. I feel the same way. It’d be so easy to drift into self-pity and mental anguish, but I refuse to do so. No whining here. I just focus on my three traits and get on with the things I can control.
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Exactly! I plan on getting out of this with my sense of humour intact.
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This was really an interesting exercise, and after some thought, I surprised myself. I’d say the three traits that have helped me most are my abilities to be analytical (what’s really going on here? What’s really a threat to me?); decisive (how am I going to respond?); and detached (I don’t have to let other peoples’ panic or fear become part of my life). None of those traits sound particularly warm and fuzzy, but they sure have been helpful.
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shoreacres, I very much like your list of three traits. These may not be the times for warm and fuzzy. You’re wise to be detached, not letting anyone else upset you. Learning where to draw emotional boundaries is a life skill I think.
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I just realized that I didn’t look at the list, either. That makes my choices even more interesting to me.
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I didn’t look at the list either. I just went with what I was feeling in the moment. I included the list only because it’s a fascinating look at humanity; the possible personality traits are varied– and sometimes a little wacko.
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Or a lot wacko!
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Yep 😁
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This is very interesting. It’s a little encouraging, in that some of the traits I exhibit made the list, which makes me feel better – I mean someone else must do that , too…right?
I tend to be adaptable and relaxed, which I think really helps right now. I know, you asked for three, but can I owe you one?
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Dan, I like your two traits and bet that because of them you’re doing great [good enough?] during this pandemic. I liked this exercise then, and now, because it does focus your mind on moving forward, not stagnating in stuckedness [a word?].
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I like “stuckedness” – I guess one of my other traits is a very loose interpretation of grammar/punctuation/vocabulary. When we got back from our walk today, I told my wife “{Maddie has been walkified”
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Ha! Oh that’s a good one. I make up words more than I should, but why not? Language need not be stilted and static to be effective. If it gets your message across, so be it.
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The list of six-hundred words is a lot to go through in a short time. Until I get back to it for further study, I quickly picked one from each larger group (positive, neutral, negative). I offer a) earnest, b) quiet, and c) cynical. I believe each is helping me address daily issues and challenges, whether housebound or free to wander. Don’t know if it is on the list but I would add “simple,” not so much being simple-minded (though some might argue that) as enjoying a relatively easy, straightforward lifestyle – happy with just me and the Bean together forever.
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That is so sweet! You guys are the cutest lovebirds ever!
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Joni, most days I think we might be more cuckoo birds more than lovebirds. But *hey* thanks for the compliment. 🙃
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Z-D, you do know yourself well, don’t you? I like your three traits and would offer that I’m “charmingly cynical” as per my description of myself for my gravatar image. No wonder we get along so well! Also, right there with you about simple. Simplicity is my word of the year, and dammit I’m going to make it happen pandemic or not. 😍
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You know I love this kind of stuff! That’s a long list, but I’ll give it a shot. Appreciative that I’m able to work from home and still receiving a paycheck while so many have lost their jobs. Empathetic to those who’ve lost loved ones to the virus. Productive…writing has been my escape.
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Jill, knowing you over the years your three traits ring true to me. You’ve got yourself figured out and are doing your best with this situation that we all find ourselves in. I imagine, if I am being honest, the traits I rely on each day change throughout the day. But if nothing else this mental health tool is a good start for the day.
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Interesting question Ally as always. A co-worker once wrote me an email saying I was the strongest, smartest, kindest person she knew, so I guess those 3 might qualify as a coping mechanism. I am strong enough to overcome this crazy situation, smart enough to be able to dissect the truth from the lies, and kind enough to look after others who need help and groceries, and in order to do that I must stay strong. I haven’t looked at the list yet….I need coffee….not usually up this early.
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Joni, it’s great that you’ve figured out your three personality traits without the list. Looking at the list is optional. The list is only there because it offers such an interesting assortment of traits, ones I’d never think of. That being said, I like how you know the ways in which you manifest your traits so it seems to me that you’ve got it going on there, girl. And that is a good thing.
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Thanks Ally! You are such a kind person!
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Ahh shucks! Thanks.
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I am pragmatic, perceptive (like you) and empathetic. At the beginning of all of “this” I was able to keep my head, sympathize when required, and in general I was somewhat removed from all of the hysteria.
But.
I feel a blog post coming on, Allie. Forgive me, but I am going to continue after the “but” on my site.
Be well.
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Maggie, I look forward to whatever comes after the “but” so will keep my eye out for your post. I think of myself as pragmatic, too. I mean, I could list 10 personality traits that are helping me deal, but that wasn’t the parameters of this particular exercise so I stayed true to what I learned. Keep it simple, I guess.
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That is a daunting list you shared there, Ally. It took me back to the 1960s “values clarification” workshops that were big then. Yuk. I sucked at them too. I could never settle down to the required number. So, to keep this simple (so important these days, yes) I’m going to say “curious, compassionate, and courageous.” I seem to be drawn to those three often of late and sure enough, they’re all helping me during this time of such unknown.
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Janet, I don’t know anything about “values clarification” workshops, but they sound like they were more intellectually rigorous than our exercise. We created our tool pretty much in the moment, glancing at a list of personality traits, deciding what was helping us right now. I love that your three traits start with the same letter, *yay* for alliteration. I also like that you know how to deal with our current situation, relying on the best in you to get you through.
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Very interesting. There are a number of those personality traits that I identify with, but when it comes to the ones that are useful in navigating through these times, I would say, balanced, persistent, and creative.
I think that we are ALL put here to be creative every day. That’s a default for everyone, even if it’s something as creating our wardrobe for the day or our breakfast. Creativity is our purpose. Balance helps me to keep all the different information sources in perspective, and to deal with the household of people. And I’m being persistent about working through projects in a mindful way.
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Arlene, I like your focus on creativity. I hadn’t thought of it in the way that you envision it and I totally agree with you: it is our purpose, if we are to continue on in this world. Balance is important as well. I’m by nature an emotionally balanced person, often finding myself as the middle person who holds everything together while everyone else flies off in a frenzy. Thanks for sharing your traits here. Most interesting.
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I’d say observant, orderly, and cerebral are the primary traits helping me get through this time. I’m taking great notice of the emergence of Spring while out on my walks and in my own back yard. I’m making sure my home is organized and neat so that my environs are serene since I’m spending a lot of time here, and following a few normal routines is also comforting. Finally, I’ve always been an In My Head sort of person: I like writing, reading (when I can concentrate), word games, and meditating.
My creativity is starting to flag in a big way, especially when it comes to cooking. I’m getting tired of planning meals!
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nance, you know yourself well. I’d agree that you’re those traits. I’m right there with you about observing the arrival of spring. Never have I ever been so aware of the arrival of a season. I’ve found myself being more tidy now that we’re here all the time, and that has surprised me truth be told.
I’m also right there with you about meal planning. I like to cook, but I’m spontaneous, often deciding about what’s for dinner at 3:30 in the afternoon, then running out to the grocery store to get the ingredients. Can’t do that now.
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I read through all 600 personality traits and had a difficult time with the negative ones. I certainly hope I’m none of those, but maybe someone close to me would differ!
But I chose 1)disciplined (I have a routine every day), 2)creative (I have my art and music to keep me busy), and 3) I’m religious (I pray every day for the people that are struggling with illness, sadness, or anger, and I pray for our country)
Fun exercise! Thanks, Ally.
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Beth, those are three personality traits that describe you well. I’m much less disciplined than you, but you probably already knew that! I’m finding that my creativity is helping us adapt to this new reality in as smooth of way as possible. As for religious, I’m more spiritual than religious; I do believe in the power of prayer and the need for daily meditation and following the golden rule, so I’d describe myself as religious lite. 😇
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Hmmm, as my mental health is hanging on by a thread….I guess it’s my sense of humor and logic that are sorta,kinda getting me through, if those things are considered personality traits….
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LA, I’d say humor and logic are personality traits that’d be helpful dealing with our current pandemic situation. It’s not like there are right or wrong answers, nor that the same traits help you every day, but this mental health exercise does focus you on where your power lies within you. Hang in there.
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🤪
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What a great post and exercise. I love your responses and the comments as well. While I think it would be delightful to be able to describe oneself as seraphic (or alternately, interesting to meet someone who actually did), I’ll go with a honest evaluation, and claim I’m creative, serene, and contemplative.
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Deborah, I like your three traits and from what I’ve read that you’ve written I’d say you’ve described yourself accurately. I’m actually more contemplative during this situation than I might have been before. I didn’t use that as one of my traits, but it is keeping me detached from all the nonsense I glance over in the news. I’m more into musing on a single thought now, not immersing myself in mountains of contradictory nonsense aka TV news.
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Good post, Ms. Bean.
I’m not stressed.
The what is, is.
Whatever will be, will be.
Que sera, sera.
But, to answer your query, I expect that I am not stressed because I’m (1) adaptable (2) balanced (3) curious.
Be cool!
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Nancy, your answers are how I think of myself as a blogger. No kidding, I use them as my ABC rule of thumb when I go to write a blog post. Am I demonstrating adaptability in this post? Am I presenting things in a balanced way? Am I allowing for curiosity? That’s my thought process as I edit what I write here.
Very trippy you are currently thinking of yourself in the same way. Two peas in a pod, I’d say. 💚
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Cool beans!
I considered calm, detached, capable, cynical . . . but these three resonated.
So I chose them, unaware that they were your ABC’s too!
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I describe myself in my online bios as “charmingly cynical” because I am. That personality trait tends to keep me safe, as I’m sure you can understand.
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What a cool post and title. It’s almost like you and your old instructor are wise mentors in a fantasy novel: ‘Yeah, I know you went on that quest, but the answer was always inside you.”
I am an excellent planner and I grew up in an era where I learned to entertain myself. Very helpful now. 🙂
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AutumnAshbough, I like your spin on this mental health exercise. Our current lives are a bit of quest, aren’t they?
I plan well, too. And being a lonely only + a latch key kid I learned how to entertain myself for hours/days on end. Helpful now, for sure.
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My strongest tools to deal with any kind of stress is: 1) looking for humor and writing about it, 2) logical thinking and accepting what I can’t change, and 3) strength of character and resolve.
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Jean R., beautifully succinct and perfectly true to what I know about you from reading your blog. I laugh often too, come to think of it. Maybe that could be my 4th personality trait!
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This is way too deep for me. I’m an airhead. I have an abundance of faith and I’m an optimist; it’s all going to be alright. I am painting and doing photography almost every day to keep busy and look at the beauty around me. I’m just a happy person, I’m just rolling along. Airhead!
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Deborah, you sound to me like a practical airhead, if I may say so. You’ve got it going on, knowing how to deal with stress in a way that keeps you sane. Nothing wrong with that.
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😀
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It’s a good exercise Ally. While I think I have many of the traits, I know I have been thinking about patience a lot. In general, I am a pretty patient person, but it is being tested for sure. I also think that being creative has helped in this situation, and although it was not on the list, “careful” is pretty important right now!
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Dorothy, careful is a great personality trait for these times. I like your acknowledgement of it as one of your personality traits. I’m trying to be patient, too. I’m laidback so you’d think that’d be may default, but this pandemic has harshed my mellow occasionally. 🤨
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Yes, it is trying. We were planning to downsize and buy a new house this spring and all that is on hold. No showings, no listings, so I have no alternative but to be patient!!!!
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Oh, Dorothy, that’s a bummer. It takes a certain amount of planning and emotional toil to even think about downsizing/selling. Then to be thwarted by this, well phooey. 😒
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I know, but it is what it is. I can only hope that the perfect house will come on the market when everything eases up, Until then, I live in a beautiful place and cannot complain!
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Good attitude. I’m glad you’re safe now and that you realize this might all be for the best when it comes to your real estate decisions. Whatcha gonna do?
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Can’t change what you can’t change, so going with the flow is the name of the game right now. I feel blessed to live in such a beautiful part of the world that is awakening to spring right now, and that certainly is a diversion! Got the cold frame set up for lettuce!
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Thanks for the thought provoking post! I’d say I’m Optimistic – I don’t have a doomsday sentiment; Athletic – this allows me to get outside on a daily basis which I desperately need; Self Sufficient – I can keep myself busy without others involvement very easily. The only thing I am struggling with right now is that I have a friend who is very, very ill and I can’t get up to see her. So in this regard, I’d say I am being obsessive. Need to figure out a coping mechanism!! Let me know if you have ideas :-).
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I got distracted when posting this! I am not sleeping because of this illness – so I’m being obsessive. 😦
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pam, your personality traits are good ones. Except for the situation with your friend, you seem to know what you need to do to stay engaged in life and sane during this pandemic. I’m sorry to read about your friend and have no advice to offer. It is so difficult to know what to do when your default behavior is blocked by circumstances outside your control and there is no obvious Plan B. Weird times. I wish you the best figuring out this conundrum.
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Thanks AB. It’s a new diagnosis and is terminal, unfortunately. This feeling of helplessness is awful. Weird times for sure.
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Yes, I can imagine. I am sorry.
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Ok! Update! I spoke to her today…that was super helpful. She is a strong woman. We are going to get her through this! Back to the optimism 💕
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That’s great news. I’m relieved to know you’re back on track. And that you’ve spoken with your friend. 🙂
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Thanks AB. I think I was focused on the end rather then the present. Makes all the difference. I think I was in shock. Sorry to blow up your blog post with this!! 💕
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Not a problem. I’m all about comments, whatever anyone wants to tell me [trolls excluded] is fine by me. Just happy to know that all is as well as it can be, considering.
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Hi Ally,
I found you through Kate, and now I see you at Kari’s, and I just wanted to say hi. And that I love the idea of this post, though that list of 600 personality traits is the kind of rabbit hole I could spend all day scrabbling my way out of. Like, who decides if a personality trait is positive or negative? I kinda think any trait can be either, depending upon the situation.
In this pandemic situation, I think the ones serving me best are: reflective, independent, and curious. I actually like more time on my own, and I like thinking about all the questions this event has raised (even if I don’t like all the answers coming to mind). I like the way it is forcing me to think about what I really want (and don’t want) in my life after.
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Rita, thanks for stopping by and commenting. It’s wonderful the way connections are made in the blogosphere. Welcome.
I totally agree with you about placing judgements on personality traits. I thought the same thing you did. I’m cynical, which is classified as negative, yet I’d say it serves me well in a positive way. Context is everything.
I, too, have become more introspective as a result of this pandemic. I like musing on things and like you am analyzing what is important to me and what I might want to let go of, allowing more space into my life for that which matters more. Not sure that’d have happened without this forced down time.
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I’m deliberately not going to look at the 600 personality traits or read through ALL of the comments so I can put my attention on this existential question and think. I reckon I’m cool calm and collected in amongst this upended world; if I weren’t I’d revert to my usual messy, disorganised and lazy way of being. Thanks Ally 🙂
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Susan, I only included the list if you wanted to peruse it for your own education. I picked my three words without consulting it. I like your three personality traits and can understand how they are keeping you grounded. It’s all about to thine own self be true, as Willy Shakes said.
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Good on Will … I liked your 3 .. 🙂
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I have not looked at this list, and probably will not. Or maybe I will – curiosity might get me. I think my traits are that I’m pragmatic (like Maggie), creative (like several of you), and – patient? Well, maybe not patient so much, as mostly solitary anyway. I spend my time these days weaving and ordering yarn. Which my budget has called a halt to. I read, I nap. I do what I feel like doing in my own space which is not small. I really am starting to feel the need for a warm hug from a friend though.
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Carol, I picked my traits without looking at the list. I merely included it here because I was fascinated by some of the choices on it. As I often say, people be weird.
I’m finding that for some people the solitary lifestyle comes more easily than for others. You sound like you have a good handle on your situation. Do what you can with what you’ve got, then do something else. It’s a reasonable plan, one that should keep you safe until you can get that hug.
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I think my 3 main traits are: adaptable, creative, and empathetic. There definitely have been positives or negative effects on my life to date, due to these. But for this crisis, adaptability has helped me adjust to the new normal. Creativity fills my hours. And empathy keeps me adhering to the rules of social distancing and self-isolation.
Deb
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Deb, well said and nicely reasoned. It is interesting to me how many commenters are mentioning creative as one of the personality traits. I cannot imagine how anyone could survive this pandemic without tapping into his or her creativity at some point. Of course whether that’s one of your top three personality traits might depend on your mood at the moment. 🤔
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My 3 traits would be patient, calm and stoic. It is what it is…. and we all have to get through it. No sense fretting and working myself up about something I can’t change. Of course, we’re blessed not having to worry about loss of employment….but as a general rule I don’t stress. My temperament is usually an even keel.
😊
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Rivergirl, I agree with you that the only way through this is to go through this. I like your personality traits, having grown up in a family of stoics your choices make sense to me. Z-D is able to work from home so like you one of us is employed at the moment. I’m not thrilled by any of this, but can’t do a thing to change things now so adapt we do.
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Oh my Ally, this was a really interesting exercise & I suspect that class must’ve been a fantastic experience. I struggled with my three – mostly because many of the qualities I usually associate with myself wouldn’t be that helpful in the current times, so I found the linked list a useful tool. My three: 1) Pragmatic 2) Understanding and 3) Quiet. That last, especially, wouldn’t usually appear on any list about me, but it has been how I’ve been dealing with things lately. By staying quiet, I’ve been able to do a lot of thinking & processing of thoughts & feelings, which has undoubtedly helped with maintaining equilibrium. I could’ve chosen Reflective, but I imagine that staying quiet while thinking before speaking has also been helpful 😀
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Deb, the class was oodles of fun and helped me understand the nuances of being stressed. I like your three traits and might have added quiet to my list had I thought of it. I’ve found myself more introspective the longer this has gone on. I take to being a hermit easily. I prefer to make sense of things later once I get perspective rather than mouth off in the moment as it happens. Thus reflective might also describe me, too. Thanks for sharing your traits here.
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Interesting exercise. I suspect my three dominant traits will vary throughout the days, but this morning I would lay claim to a sense of humor, determination, and being an encourager. Later today, or tomorrow . . . who knows? (Maybe that points to flexibility?)
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Donna, I agree with you that my traits vary– sometimes by the hour almost. 🙄 BUT I do try to establish three traits in my mind each morning, then remind myself throughout the day what they are, who I am. Being of sound mind, I hope that I’ll remain of sound body.
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Contemplative because I have lots of time to think. Sociable because I like people, and am trying to find ways to connect, even in isolation. Teacherly because I’m working at learning about myself and others during this time.
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Margaret, I think you speak for most of us when you say you’re contemplative. I rather like this downtime away from people but I’m a lonely only so this reminds me of my childhood when I was expected to entertain myself for hours on end.
Teacherly? Is that a personality trait? If’n you’d have been in my class I don’t think you’d have gotten away with that one; it’s too close to a job title. Just saying… 😉
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It was in the list of 600. It seemed like a strange one to me too, but it fit.
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Huh. Well then, by all means go for it. What do I know?
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Just like the previous commenter, I picked “teacherly” from the list. Over 40 years in education has left its indelible mark.
Also, empathetic and sane.
Sorry, I didn’t read all 600 traits; otherwise, I go INsane! 🙂
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Marian, no one had to read the list of personality traits. I linked to it because I thought it was interesting. Many of those traits were *news* to me. That being said I like your selections. Hang onto those ideas and you’ll make it through this pandemic in fine order.
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I was too lazy to look through the whole list. Even so, accessible jumped out at me. People always know where to find me. Like Google although without all of the options. I’ll also borrow your traits of creativity and organization. 😀 😁
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L. Marie, accessible is a good trait that I hadn’t thought of before now. I can see how that’d help you during these weird times. FYI, I picked my traits without looking a the list. I know who I am, but that list is fascinating. I mean, some of those traits… really?
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My first verbal reaction after finishing the post was (in a high, winy, Wayne Campbell-like voice): “oh man, homework!” The one thing this pandemic has started to bring on for me is some serious ennui. But I must say, I personally found the list of 600 to be somewhat inspiring rather than the mere cheat-sheet some saw it to be. I labored over that baby! So in the absence of a dramatic drumroll, I present to you my three traits: Balanced, Steady, & Witty. At this point, I think they can also describe my retirement savings performance in that very order! 🙂
In all seriousness, I do agree with your thought at the top of the post: that being calm is the key to overcoming any adversity. That pretty much sums up our collective life right now. Thanks for a thoughtful post, Ally. And also for busting the boredom today. – Marty
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Marty, I never intended for this post to be homework, yet so many commenters have taken it seriously enough to go read that list. I added it because I thought it was darned fascinating. Who knew there were so many choices?
I like your three personality traits and think they reflect who you seem to be rather nicely. Well done. As for retirement accounts, at this point it’d seem that Z-D may never retire now. 🙄
I don’t mean to sound preachy in this post, but, as you realize, everyone has gotta try to keep calm if we’re all going to get through this together. It’s not a message that seems to be getting the attention it should. Seems to me.
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I glanced at the list and, in addition to being organized and conscientious, which I didn’t need the list to tell me, one word jumped out as I scrolled through and that word is uncomplaining. That word, which sounds like it isn’t actually a word, fits to a T. I have a wall hanging thingy that says, “It is what it is (and it will be what you make it.” It’s difficult to complain if one is pragmatic and accepting of the roller coaster ups and downs life offers. (I do have brief moments of denial and/or shock, as one does, but I’m usually quick to remind myself it is what it is and go from there…)
I get you’re organized and creative. Please detail how you’re being perceptive during this epidemic. I’m intrigued! Perhaps I can use this trait to help myself in future trials and tribulations.
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Tara, I like the word uncomplaining and agree it’s a good one, maybe even perfect, for this time in history. If you are healthy at home, with food to eat, then you should be uncomplaining, imo.
Perceptive? I mean that I see details in news articles that don’t add up so I dismiss the source. I see how people react to situations and observe whether their behavior makes sense in that context. I understand how someone might be trying to pour their heart out, but haven’t found the words yet. I pay attention and I care and I try not to judge. Just take it in, make note. Perceptive.
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Agreed!
Mm hmm. I see. Perceptive would be on my list then, based on your definition, but not in the top 3, during a crisis anyway. Well, maybe it would depend on the crisis — I’m around a complainer so that may be a reason number three jumped out at me. 🙂
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There may be a better word for what I’m trying to say with perceptive. Like having a high EQ. With empathy mixed in. While staying detached, but remaining kind.
[Why yes, I’m clear as mud here, aren’t I?]
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I think perceptive’s an excellent word for that.
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Tool boxes – always a good thing considering people are so weird – and they are just everywhere and often will not be quiet. HAHA
Great idea to choose 3 each morning and focus on them
I’ll probably always get stuck with intentionally unpredictable ( which is not the same as erratic) and got plastered with the “creative” tag early in life ( they used to use that when they didn’t know what to do with you…) and maybe objective problem solve..(well, if no one else will speak up and do it, somebody has to get things moving…we’ll straighten is all out later – stop the bleeding first…)…Will have to check out the list…but you know, the “homework” thing as above and depending on other’s preconceived ideas and suggestions….fit some mold? what mold? I though mold was bad for your health and should be eliminated. HAHA
Fun post and comments. Onward through the pandemic!
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philmouse, there is no homework to be had here. There’s just an opportunity to think about yourself with the help of a list– or not. I picked my traits off the top of my head because I know me well at this point. That being said I could just as easily pick three different traits tomorrow and be comfortable applying them to my day. It’s all about focusing on something positive rather than the endless noise about what is going on.
I relate to your problem-solver personality trait. That’s how I think, too. If you tell me a problem, while I may understand that you need to vent, I’ll also be thinking of a solution for you to try. Kind of on parallel tracks in my mind.
Onward, indeed. Stay safe, be well.
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Intriguing post & comments! Funny, industrious, aware.
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Colette, yes I’m intrigued by the answers to the question, too. I like your traits. I have them myself, although more during normal times than now. Still they’re in my top 10.
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I’d go with logical (what is this and how do I react to keep me and my loved ones safe) and flexible (ok, gym is closed how can I exercise so I don’t turn into blubber?). For a third maybe I’d say detached. I can’t take on the burden of others emotionally so I don’t. (One of my favorite phrases is “it’s not my monkey”) I help out where I can and that’s the best I can do for my own mental health. Loved the comments! I came late to the game so I got to read a gazillion of them!
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Kate, I like your personality traits. They make sense to me and I can see how they’re helping you remain safe and sane. I often say not my circus, not my monkeys so we’re on the same page with that sentiment.
I agree about the comments on this post. I had no idea what to expect when I pushed publish. I don’t usually do anything like this kind of post, but I felt compelled to share. Seems like I made a good choice.
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I took the little quizzie thingie to find out my ‘personality type’ and surprise surprise – I’m an IDEALIST. (who would have guessed??) 😆 So the three things that keep me ‘cool’ (I don’t handle stress nor change that well) are my tendency towards escapist thinking, my questioning mind, and my imagination. That last thing wasn’t on any list by the way, but without it? I think this virus mess would have bested me.
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Melanie, I like idealists. I sometimes get that answer on personality quizzes, too. I know what you mean about the usefulness of having a good imagination. I can zone out into my dreams when need be. I am glad to know that this virus hasn’t got the best of you. Hang in there.
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Wow, that engendered a lot of responses and it was fun skimming through them. I didn’t notice the link for the list the first read-through, but although I clicked on it, it’s still sitting there waiting for me to maybe look at it later. My traits? I’d like to think I’m creative, but who knows? I’m definitely positive and have a sense of humor. After many years, I’m also fairly patient, and I’m an encourager. OK, I’ve probably gone over. 🙂 Happy Tuesday and stay well.
janet
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Janet, I’m surprised by the response to this post, too. I’m glad, if it helps someone feel more empowered then that’s great. Being positive and having a sense of humor are effective at any time. Being patient is good, too. We all are what we are!
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Hum, I’m not sure how self-aware I am. I’m able to ignore my husband. A necessary skill when sometimes stuck inside with each other and having to hear the same story again. Wish I could ignore the news.
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Jan, I don’t know if ignoring is a personality trait, but maybe it is! I haven’t read all 600 traits so let’s just say it is. I ignore the news– no problem, but a babbling husband is more difficult for me to ignore. I give you props for being able to do that.
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Whew! I couldn’t get through all the comments (looking for the best ones to crib from), nor have I looked at the list (though I intend to later – probably a great resource for a writer🙂). I’ve never been particularly introspective, either, so this is a toughie…
Curious is right up there. I am always wanting to learn and observe new things and it keeps my mind occupied outside myself. Analytical is probably another. I love solving problems (like how to sew a face mask when I have no fabric supply), and thinking through why the people I write about did what they did. And Tidy. My home isn’t spotless, but I don’t mind the tasks. Gives me a break from the first two traits!
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Eilene, I picked my three traits without looking at the list, too. I didn’t intend for the list to be required reading, only adding it to this post because I found the list of words interesting.
Having read your blog for a while I can see how curious, analytical, and tidy are the three traits that are helping you deal with this situation we are all in. I’d say you’re more introspective than you realize. You’ve got this “to thine own self be true” concept down pat. 😎
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Hmm – I am muddy about what my traits would be Ally. I am studious I guess as I’m spending way too much time trying to understand the facts and figures, reading and absorbing by osmosis as I hear the many press conferences, only to come away overwhelmed a little. I am pragmatic – I mean, what you do with this deck of cards you have been dealt? You can quietly acquiesce and go with the flow or become a rabblerouser and rant as much as you want, but it’s not going to make things better right now as your complaints are falling on deaf ears. I guess I will borrow from your traits and say creative – I have to have a diversion … walking takes care of the morning, but as enthusiasm wanes through the day, it is nice to know a little writing will fill the gap between more horrific stats and a whole lot of sighing going on.
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Linda, you’ve described yourself well. I sense that you know how you’re getting through this, not that you like what we’re going through, but you know how to stay sane, for you, right now. And that’s really the point of the question. The thing about this mental health tool is that each day is different so each answer may be different as well. I only happened to remember it over the weekend when I was feeling stuck, so being creative, I decided to write about it. Thanks for taking the time to answer the question.
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Hi, Ally – Cool exercise and very cool post! After following your blog for awhile now, ‘organized, creative and perceptive’ seem spot-on for you. As well, the comments of others whom I follow, also rang true. Without giving it too much thought (and without checking the list of 600 criteria) for myself I would say,
positive, caring, diligent.
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Donna, I picked my words from my own sense of self-awareness. In fact I found the list after I wrote the post and added it here because I thought it was fascinating. I like your three traits and agree that they seem to be you, spot on. I can understand how they’ll help you safely navigate these unusual times. Stay safe, be well.
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That list of traits makes for good descriptive reference words for writing, if nothing else!
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Amanda, I agree. I don’t know that I think all of those words are what I’d describe as personality traits, but it’s a place to start if you don’t already know which three personality traits are helping you cope. I just picked my traits and didn’t refer to the list.
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I just took the cursoriest of cursory looks at the list of 600 traits. Very interesting to see which traits were listed in the 3 categories of Positive, Neutral, and Negative. For instance, aggressive is listed in both Neutral and Negative. Also, blunt is listed in Negative, but I’ll bet New Yorkers and other East Coasters really appreciate that trait and consider it positive. I’m going to look that list over in more detail when I have time. Thanks Ally. 🙂
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The Travel Architect, the list is fascinating for the very reason you mentioned. I’m sure many east coasters would say blunt is good; I sometimes feel that way. Similarly I am cynical which the list said is Negative, BUT I’d say that because I am cynical I am safer as I go through life: don’t get taken in by conmen often. If nothing else this exercise in self-awareness makes you think and I’m all for that.
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I once heard that the people who lived longest (I think the study was about those who reached 100) were thin, suspicious, white women. I figured I was well on my way.😀 Being cynical has its virtues.
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Colette, I love that. I was born cynical, truth be told. 🤨
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I say “I come by my cynicism honestly.”😐
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That’s a great line!
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Thanks Ally! (So is born cynical. I picture a tiny baby narrowing its eyes and looking around skeptically.)😊
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Hm. I would say 1) I’m kind, 2) I’m creative and 3) I’m funny. These have definitely kept me going in the last couple of weeks. (I didn’t read all 600 traits to know if these three were on the list but this is what I think.)
Good tool for the toolbox. Thanks for sharing it. 🙂
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I went back and looked so let’s change Funny to Dramatic. That’s probably more accurate anyway.
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MOSY, I like that you’re dramatic as opposed to funny. I didn’t use the list to determine my three personality traits, but going through it after I wrote what I did, I could see how I might have been more nuanced in my answer if I’d used some of those words. I also think of myself as kind and creative, although maybe less kind at the moment, but definitely creative. Thanks for taking the time to answer the question.
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Woah….that’s like 600 traits. Quickly in a glimpse, I find myself creative, observant and loyal. I will take a more detailed look into the list and get to know myself more. That’s a fun activity Ally. Thank you for sharing! 🙂
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Nanchi.blog, I’m glad you enjoyed this exercise. Your choice of personality traits make sense to me. I think most of us know ourselves well enough to not need the list, but it is fun to look through, especially now that we all have time on our hands. 😉
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Absolutely.😉 I am eager to explore myself.
Also, currently reading a book to keep myself sane in the time of distress. Shared the details in my new post.
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Will check it out. Thanks.
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Wow! Great exercise, Ally. After a short introspection, I would say I am…kind, curious, and stubborn. Thanks for making me think!
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Laurie, I’m pleased that you liked this exercise. From what I’ve read on your blog, your three personality traits sound spot on to who you are. They’ll do you well as we continue on during this pandemic.
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1) I’m lazy
2) I’m reclusive
3) I’m HELLA lazy
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Marian, I suspect that you’ve got it made when it comes to staying safe during this pandemic. ‘Tis a good time to be reclusive. And of course lazy might be what saves you. I can understand that.
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Yeah, I move so little, the Coronavirus thinks I’m inorganic.
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😁
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Evening, Ally. Bypassing your question, I’ll say this: What you say about staying calm is very true. When calm, we deal with situations a heck of a lot better than otherwise. And that’s more important than ever when we’re faced with a crisis, such as we now are.
Be well. Take care.
Neil
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Neil, staying calm and focused is the name of the game now, isn’t it? I’m glad I remembered having taken that class. The question obviously came back to me when the time was right.
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After reading the list, I think I’d declare myself creative, hardworking, and stubborn. I wish I didn’t have to admit the stubborn one, but, hey, it is what it is. 🙂 Hope you are staying well and mentally energized. I find the mental isolation much more challenging than the physical aspect.
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Judy, your three personality traits are good ones for these times. I think there’s nothing wrong with being stubborn when faced with the challenges we’re dealing with. It’s all about the context with that trait, imo.
I know what you mean about the mental isolation of this. I can stay home happily, but I’m more engaged with the world while doing so, often popping out to do something spontaneously. Not anymore, though.
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I’m an introvert so social distancing isn’t a big deal for me.
I have a tendency to be a clean freak.
Being a pessimist has actually served me well this past month+.
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G. J. Jolly, you’ve got it going on there. Three personality traits that are meant for these weird days. Thanks for stopping by to comment. Stay safe, be well.
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Well … it’s been such a blur, I can’t remember who I am or what traits I have to keep me going … hmm, let’s see, I think I’m patient (or at least I used to think so), I’m positive (or at least I think I used to be ;-)), and I’m faithful (I’m holding hard to the faith that things will get better SOON!). Stay well, Ally – as always, your blog is a fun place to visit! xx
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Shelley, your traits sound like good ones that’ll get you through. I wonder who we’ll all be when this is over. Probably need to do a follow-up post to this one in about a year… 🤔
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Thank you, I hope they do get me through this. Yes, a follow-up post in the future will be interesting for sure.
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I’m one of those woo-woo people who thinks everyone can benefit from therapy because everyone needs a toolbox. I realize this class wan’t exactly therapy, but look at your toolbox! 😀
I’ll claim perceptive and organized as well. I’ll also claim adaptable.
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joey, I agree that good mental health therapy can benefit anyone. This class was less intense than actual therapy, but it was a good way to encourage us to look within. I think your personality traits are spot on to who you seem to be in your blog. Good to hear from you.
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🙂
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This is definitely thought-provoking. I had a quick look through the list. It’s such an informative post. Thanks for sharing it! I think it’s a good exercise to delve in a learn about yourself. I actually presented this question to some friends and family during an exercise I was doing a month or so ago and there seemed to be a consensus of genuine/authentic, non-judgmental, and trustworthy. I strive for that, so it made me happy that this is how I was viewed among people that interact with me on a regular basis. As far as traits from the list that are helping me through this time, I’d say: adaptable, compassionate, and reflective.
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Amy, your traits are perfect for these times. Reflective is especially important. I’d say that, like you, if I was to have other people evaluate me I’d be focusing on different traits. But now is the time to dig deep and be your best self.
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