The Husband

In Which We Learn The Secret To Longevity According To My Husband

/ Ally Bean / 14 Comments

~ An early morning conversation between husband [HIM] & wife [ME] that took place in our bathroom ~

HIM:  { stepping out of the shower, drying off, looking in my direction }  You look pretty.

ME:  { awake for less than 15 seconds, standing in front of the mirror, looking at the crazy mess that is my curly hair pre-styling }  Huh?

HIM:  { hanging up his towel }  Your hair looks pretty like that.

ME:  { wondering why I am being forced to converse before my first cup of coffee }  Huh!

HIM:  { looking into the mirror, starting to comb his straight wet hair }  I know that you think that I’m being facetious when I say that you look pretty, but I’m not.

ME:  { using a scrunchie, pulling the top portion of my bobbed hair up into a vertical straggly looking ponytail-esque style good enough for going downstairs to get a cup of coffee }  Huh.

HIM:  { applying shaving cream to his face, looking like Father Time }  And do you know why I’m not being facetious when I say that you look pretty?  It’s because…

ME:  { distracted while searching for my eyeglasses }  What?

HIM:  { looking into the mirror, starting to shave his face while chuckling at his supposed cleverness }  …I don’t know what “facetious” means, so I can’t be saying anything facetious.

ME:  { finally realizing that I’m going to have to talk to him because he’s so full of it }  So if you don’t know what a word means when you use it, then when a doctor tells you that you have some sort of disease that you’ve never heard of, you won’t have it because you don’t know what it is?!!!

HIM:  { stopping mid-shave, looking at me, pontificating upon his brilliance }  Yep.  That’s it exactly.  That’s how I’m going to live to be one hundred: if I don’t know what it is, I can’t get it.  Ignorance is the key to good health.

ME:  { putting on my slippers, leaving the bathroom in search of coffee }  Well then, you’ve nailed that ignorance part.  Enjoy your long life.  I hope you and your second wife will be happy together.

~ The End ~

Reflections On Dining Early & Sharing Happiness

/ Ally Bean / 24 Comments

A FEW WEEKS AGO we drove four hours north to visit Zen-Den’s parents + his sister & her family.  It was his mother’s birthday, so it seemed like a good time to see what was up with his mother and his father. 

We arrived at his parents’ house around noon and spent the afternoon talking with them.  Then around 4:00 p.m. we drove with his parents to a brand new Outback Steakhouse where we met his sister, her husband and their teenage daughter.

We were seated at a long table with banquette seating on one side of the table and chairs on the other.  The room’s decor was modern with lots of muted dark colors in geometric patterns and large pendant lights with drum shades.  The look reminded me of my late aunt’s home which was filled with mid-century modern furniture.

# # #

WE RARELY HAVE THE opportunity to get together with Z-D’s family so sitting in this beautiful restaurant, eating good food, chatting, laughing was special for us, for me.  It reminded me of when my parents were alive and I was a little girl.  The three of us would go out to dinner somewhere fancy, usually early because my dad refused to wait for a table.  And we would have the best time.

So with my happy past in mind, while sitting there at the Outback Steakhouse I took a moment to look around the table, to really see who was there.   And I was struck by the strangest thoughts, out of nowhere.  Fragments of my life, I suppose.

# # #

I REALIZED THAT MY niece is the same age as I was when my father died.  That my SIL looks so relaxed & happy that she could be half her age. That my BIL, who is retiring this year, is exactly ten years younger than my mother was when she retired.  That my MIL, whose birthday we were celebrating, is turning the age that my mother was when she died.  That my FIL is so lost in the fog of Alzheimer’s that I doubt that I’ll ever visit with the real man again.

And as for Zen-Den and I, here is what I observed: we are much older now, both physically and spiritually.  In some ways, life has worn us out.  On the other hand, we’ve learned, adapted, moved on so many times that somewhere along the winding way we’ve both developed deeper understandings of relationships, beliefs, limitations– and the value of focusing on shared happiness.

At an Outback Steakhouse, for instance.  On an early Saturday evening.  While dawdling around a table after dinner.

5 Truths & A Lie

/ Ally Bean / 21 Comments

[I got the idea for this post from Rara at Rarasaur;  her answers are here.  She got the idea for her post from Jen at Sips of Jen and Tonic;  her answers are here.  Go visit them both.  You’ll like ’em.]

• • • 

Here’s what I’m doing.  It’s a bit of a game.  I’m going to tell you a few things about me: 5 things will be truthful, 1 thing will be a lie.  Depending on how closely you’ve been paying attention to me all these years you’ll know the lie immediately.  Or not.

Whoever correctly figures out which statement is a lie, will win the opportunity to either: 1) be a guest poster on this blog;  or 2) have me write a haiku about you that’ll be posted on this blog.  Your choice.

Ready?  Here goes.

• • • 

1.  THE HUBSTER proposed to me in the parking lot of a bakery.  He had no ring with him.  All he said was: “so when do you want to get married?”  And that was that.

2.  I PLAYED the violin when I was a girl.  I learned in a Suzuki method class [which means by ear, not by written music].  While I never excelled at playing the violin I did make it to state regional orchestra level one year.  I was the last seat.  And I hated the experience.

3.  WE LIVE in a hilly area in a home built on a wooded ravine lot.  Once upon a time we purchased 200 tons of dirt so that we could create a backyard.  It was a messy project, but now we have a lower level terrace instead of the forest primeval.

4.  I DRIVE a gray SUV.  I named him Bullwinkle because of his color [which Lexus says is blue, but they’re wrong].  He’s not a new vehicle,  but he gets me where I need to go.

5.  I’M NOT a fan of the traditional Thanksgiving Day dinner.  I’ve made my share of them over the years and they were delicious, but I’d rather have a good steak with a baked potato for dinner than turkey + all that carbohydrate crap.

6.  I HAVE narrow feet, as in women’s AA shoes.  This is more of a problem than you might initially imagine because there are very, very, very few AA shoes available.  The result of this is that I keep my shoes forever and am usually forced to wear a pair of “so out of date you have no idea what decade they came from” shoes.          

• • • 

Something Different This Way Comes

/ Ally Bean / 19 Comments

“It looks like the repo man has been here.”

~ Zen-Den, looking at the mess in our home office

– • –

Over the weekend we decided to start the process of updating our home office.  It’s where I write this blog and I’ve never been happy with the furniture arrangement and accessories in here.  Too dark.  Too orange-y.  Too blah.

So we ordered a real desk.  Then in anticipation of its arrival we dismantled the computer system that sits on/around/near the horizontal surfaces that I’ve spent the last few years pretending are a desk.  And finally, we dragged all this old, orange-y, non-desk furniture into the basement.

Bottom line?  Cora, my trusty desktop computer that I use to write this blog, is now sitting on a little table that is scrunched into a dusty corner of the deconstructed home office.  Consequently, this means that for the next few weeks until the desk is here and the computer system is back in place, I’m going to be away from the my favorite keyboard.

Considering that Late Summer morphing into Autumn is a beautiful and mellow time of year, I’ve decided that while everything is in flux I’m taking a proper blogging hiatus during the month of September.  Might even extend it into October.  We’ll see.

So with that being said, I’m stepping away from the computer and taking a bit of time off to enjoy my life without the need to write about it.  Shocking idea, I know.

I’ll catch up with you later, kids.  Be safe. Be happy. Be.