TV

The One With Ally’s Weird Dream

/ Ally Bean / 14 Comments

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First, I’ll tell you about the dream: 

driving in my white coupe down road in flat farm country where I grew up – get behind slow-moving gray van – pass on the left but van pushes me off the road into corn field – drive safely through field and get back on road in front of van – once in front of van my car turns into my blue bike from when I was a girl – ride bike to lowest level of parking garage at a mall near where I live now – lock bike on bike rack – rearrange all of my stuff into bags so that it is comfortable for me to carry – Abby Sciuto [of NCIS] looks on as I do this – then off we go together to shop upstairs in the mall

Then, I’ll explain the weird part: 

In the dream I lock my bike using my girlhood yellow bike lock.  When I first look at the lock I’m dismayed because I don’t know the combination, but then I think about it– and remember the lock combination.  For real. In my dream. The actual lock combination for a lock that I haven’t used in decades. 

Finally, I’ll hypothesize about what this dream might mean: 

  • I’ve flipped for sure this time.
  • My subconscious is telling me that I’ve unlocked something [important?] from my past.
  • I need to stop watching NCIS before I go to sleep.
  • My subconscious is telling me that I’m all organized now, so it is time for me to move on.
  • On the roadways of life, small & determined  [my coupe] trumps large & in the way [the van].
  • My subconscious is telling me that it’s time for me to start exercising more.
  • I’m way cooler in my dreams than I am in real life.

In Which I Am Not Mindful While Shopping In The Grocery Store

/ Ally Bean / 20 Comments

I found myself with an hour of free time late in the afternoon.  As I was already out & about I decided to run into Kroger to pick up a few things.  Because I wasn’t planning on going there, I didn’t have my shopping list with me.

I knew that I needed 6 items to make what I had in mind for dinner, so I decided to assign each ingredient to a finger/thumb.  The result of this impromptu shopping list was that I looked like a child counting on my fingers as I shopped.  Goofy as it was, my finger list did work.  BUT it also meant that I started pushing my cart, a large one, with one hand.

And if there is anything that you must remember about me, it is that I am not too coordinated.  Clumsy, even.

Thus, it will come as no surprise when I tell you that while counting on one hand and pushing the cart with my other hand I managed to block a produce aisle with my catty-wampus, slightly out-of-control cart.

I knew immediately that I was in the way.  Pretty much because I heard the metal clank of my cart bumping another cart head-on.  It’s a sound one recognizes even while staring at one’s fingers and thumb.

I looked up ready to offer an apology when I  realized that the woman who I’d inconvenienced was Lilias Folan.  As in someone famous.  As in someone with a nationally syndicated PBS TV show.  As in the woman who is sometimes credited with introducing yoga to the USA.

Yep, that’s who I bashed into in the grocery produce department.  Good job, Ms. Bean.

But here’s the thing, Lilias was just standing there with a kind smile on her face waiting for the crazy lady [moi] to get out of her way.  She had no where to back up to, so her choice was to be patient OR to get angry.  And because she was living her life off the mat as she did on the mat, she chose the former.

Of course, me being me, after I said that I was sorry I tried to explain myself by babbling about fingers and no shopping list and dinner– et cetera, et cetera.  And my dithery explanation, I’m happy to report, got Lilias laughing.

This made me feel better about my screw-up and got me thinking that it’s time for me to get back into yoga because I want to be that older woman with perfect posture, a calm aura & the ability to laugh when things go wrong.

And who better to emulate than Lilias?  The bumpee in my brush bump with greatness.

My Take On Valentine’s Day: A Contrarian’s Point Of View

/ Ally Bean / 20 Comments

Screen Shot 2013-02-12 at 9.57.18 AMI won’t lie.  I think that for adults Valentine’s Day is a big ‘ole waste of time & money.  Too contrived.

I like hearts.  I like chocolate.  I like flowers.  I like dinner.  I like jewelry.

But need we do them all on one day?  Would we not be better served if we distributed these little treats of life over the course of a year?

I think that we would be.  And as I adhere to the philosophy that one should be the change one wants to see, I can assure you that the extent of my Valentine’s Day celebration will be this post… with the cute little heart on it.

The rest of you, please carry on in a way that makes sense to you.  I know that you will regardless of what I write here.  Have a good time.  Please.  Do.

But as for me, I think that I’ll follow the wise words of Dharma from Dharma & Greg: “A big part of being open is to embrace things you know are stupid.”

Which, for me, is Valentine’s Day.  Happy Valentine’s Day everyone.

[Image from here.]

Back When TV Was Truly Refined

/ Ally Bean / 10 Comments

… After yesterday’s constant stream of sad news I’m feeling a bit nostalgic today.  

This is funny and sweet.  It’s a reminder of how smart + delightful television used to be.  So. Very. Calm.

I miss watching TV shows that were in black & white.  I miss seeing TV shows that don’t *flash* and *bang* all over the place.  I miss being entertained by TV shows that don’t try to impress me with their super hipness.

But mostly I miss the kind of innocence that allowed a pleasant “nobody” to outsmart a panel of curious “somebodies” by merely being herself.  With a smile.

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[H/T to Maria Popova at Brain Pickings.  More info + other video clips here.]

[Unrelated to this video, but interesting to know, the contestant later wrote a memoir titled Look Back and Laugh.  Writers are everywhere, aren’t they?]