Our weather around here has been “off” for almost 10 months now. First, last summer we had the worst drought ever on record– which lead to an ugly autumn. Then we had an early winter followed by the wettest spring on record. I don’t think that I’m overstating it when I say that this weird weather is making people crazy. They aren’t behaving nicely at all.
And I certainly have felt the brunt of this unhappiness.
I work from home so I don’t have to engage with people on a daily basis if I don’t want to. I’m naturally observant and I’m very empathetic [as are many introverts, btw]. All of this combined together means that when I do go into the world, I’m more highly attuned to what is going on. And the negative energy hits me harder than most other people who I know.
In fact, yesterday when I shared the details of some friends’ rude behavior, I was just giving you, my gentle readers, a brief glimpse into what has been going on behind the scenes in my life. Everywhere I turn among those who one year ago I would have described as friends, I find strangeness and hostility. Throughout this year I’ve been marginalized, used, put down, and most recently, completely ignored. Apparently I’m now invisible, too.
I tell Zen-Den about my ridiculous encounters with friends, acquaintances, humanity. He listens. And then he tells me that I’m too nice to too many people who don’t care one iota about me. And that it’s time for me to cut bait.
He’s right, of course.
Sad as it is for me to say, many (most?) of my current friendships have run their courses. I’ve always been more of a free spirit than anyone else I know. But there’s more to this disconnection than that. Being on my own as much as I have been these last few years, I’ve evolved into a more relaxed, open-minded person than when I first met so many of these people. I’m more liberal now. I’m more focused on healthy living. I’m more creative. And I’m much more concerned with living in the moment– not agonizing over the future– being able to let go of the past.
So that is exactly what I am doing here in this blog post. I’m making the choice to be good to myself now and in the future. I’m saying good-bye to the most negative, small-minded group of people I’ve ever known. And I’m telling the world in no uncertain terms: I deserve better.
Now, I shall go out and make it so. Care to join me?