Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil. Psalm 37:8
If a bumper sticker makes fun of, puts down, accuses, antagonizes, rejects, hates, pees upon, or whines about <any topic you can think of>, I’ve seen it on a vehicle in the last few weeks.
To say that I’m tired of these hostile, rude bumper stickers on vehicles would be an understatement. Really people, get a clue. Your bumper stickers are not contributing to the national discourse. They add nothing of value to society. They are a distraction while driving. And they’re just plain tacky.
Nope. I don’t like ’em one bit. Which got me thinking…
How do I make this situation better?
And here is my solution: a mischievous plan that is delightful in its subtlety and entertaining in its message. *bwha-ha-ha* A plan so ingenious that I’m surprised that no one has thought of it before. A plan so clever that it made the Lawyer Bean laugh and promise to provide legal counsel for me should there be a need.
First, I’d buy a couple dozen of this positive, upbeat bumper sticker and keep them in my car. Only a cretin could not be charmed by the message: “wag more bark less.”
Then when I see one of these previously mentioned annoying bumper stickers on a vehicle in a parking lot, I’d wander over to the vehicle with one of my more encouraging bumper stickers in hand. Making certain that I was unnoticed, I’d slap my sweet little oval sticker over the offensive, negative bumper sticker.
And *bam* just like that I’d have quietly neutralized the negativity and made the world a better place– while simultaneously ensuring that I receive one more brownie point in heaven. Talk about your win-win situation!
So what do you think, gentle readers? Good idea? Couldn’t possibly be an act of vandalism with a court date and a fine, could it? And if so, how much do you suppose I’d have to pay for refusing to let stupid get the last word in– or on, as the case may be?