Facebook, Friends & Flow Charts

Here’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.  Brought to you by the letter “F.”

• Facebook.  I was talking with a casual acquaintance the other day.  Over the years we’ve gotten to know each other– sort of.  She is nothing if not outspoken.

Often we talk about FB.  It fascinates her that I just left it.  Like that.  No worries, no looking back.  It’s kind of a theme with her.

And honestly, I’m fascinated about why she doesn’t leave FB.  She hates it– complains about it every time we are together.  In fact one of her biggest complaints is that her friends have the audacity to post status updates using words. That they think she’ll read about what they’re doing.  This seems to bother her to no end.  She mentions it often.

So, I asked her straight up why she messes around with something that so clearly upsets her.

And she told me that the only reason she stays on FB is so that she can see the photos that her friends post.  She wants to see these photos so that she can judge how these friends look.  Her word: judge.

Being the polite soul that I am, I just nodded my head up & down, mumbled a vague sort of “uh-huh,” and quickly changed the topic of conversation to something that didn’t give me a glimpse into the psyche of someone so shallow– and probably– more typical than I care to admit.


• Friends.  I stumbled upon this article: Bitter About Your Life? Blame Facebook.  The subtitle says: “New research suggests heavy Facebook users are more likely to believe other people have happier lives.”  

According to this article, researchers posit that this perception is due to the fact that people see all sorts of happy photos that FB friends post.  Then these people assume that other people are having a better time than they are.  Enter bitter feelings.

Wonder if that is what’s going on with my acquaintance… seeing how she is a nut for photos.


• Flow charts.  While I was enjoying all that Pinterest has to offer, I came upon this wonderful How to Delete Half Your Facebook “Friends” flow chart.  It is by a blogger named Samantha who keeps a blog called ashore.

I love this chart.  Now I just need to get my acquaintance to understand it and use it.  Might make her happier about her experiences on FB.  Maybe.

10 thoughts on “Facebook, Friends & Flow Charts

  1. That is an excellent flow chart! I stay on FB for the couple of friends that I don’t really keep in touch with any other way. I generally use it to post funny videos or jokes that I wouldn’t put on the blog. There is a lot to annoy me but I don’t have the chutzpah to delete everyone who posts offensive political messages that make me question humanity (and their intelligence). I generally just block them.


  2. I don’t really like FB either, to be honest and rarely use it. I’ll look more than post. Much prefer Twitter. Love the flow chart, though! I’m not sure I have enough “friends” on FB do make the exercise worthwhile.


  3. Zazzy, I liked the flow chart, too. Simple and smart.

    Polly, I know what you mean about twitter. It may not be perfect, but the ppl I follow there seem to be more engaged in the social aspects of things– and less in the hateful, obnoxious &/or political aspects of things.

    Relyn, you’re welcome. I agree re: friendships formed in the blogosphere.


  4. I like FB, but I take it for what it is. People amuse me in their drama, their artifices and their silliness. Plus, I love keeping in touch with former students and colleagues who have moved to places like Palm Springs, Coeur d’Alene, Turkey and Bhutan. I do know people like your friend though; my older daughter is a little like that–thinking that EVERYONE else has such a great life and she doesn’t. I have to remind her about Reality. I have lots of stories to tell her about friends/acquaintances whose lives I envied and what they weren’t telling anyone.


  5. Margaret, I choose to not be on FB because that’s what works best for me. I don’t care if other ppl are on it as long as they are happy about being there. Trust me when I say that this acquaintance is not happy about being on FB– yet she remains there and interrogates me about my choice whenever I see her. I feel like we’ve been over this topic one too many times– and that there are more than a few screws loose inside her head!


  6. I love FB, but I have a very different experience (thankfully) than your acquaintance. If I were suffering there, I’d bail. My friends there are like my blog friends (in fact, they’re either my blog friends or people I know in real life), and we support each other and cheer each other on and help to try to lift each other up. Perhaps your friend might do well to do some weeding, ala your flowchart, if she wants to stay connected that way. There are a lot of weirdos out there. Why talk to them?


  7. J, I’ve concluded (sadly) that she likes being able to complain about people, and her FB friends allow her to do this. It’s a weird situation for me because we have other topics of shared interest [travel, decorating our homes], but it ALWAYS comes back to a long involved conversation about FB. I can’t stop her, of course… but I can avoid her!


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