In Which My Parking Is Duly Noted

Let’s discuss this, shall we?

•  I found this note from Cranky McCrankerton taped to the windshield of my car, a small two door coupe, when I walked out of my doctor’s office after an appointment.  Beautiful handwriting, no?

•  I remember parking beside Cranky McCrankerton’s vehicle, a huge van.  It was to the right of me.  I had to be very careful not to hit it as I pulled into the last spot available in the compact parking lot that has only one way in & out.

•   I had parked my car at a slight angle because I was accommodating the car already parked to the left of me.  That car was accommodating the car that was parked illegally in the spot to its left.  Beyond the illegally parked car was grass, the end of the line, nowhere else to go.

•  I believe that the intent of this note is to criticize me and what Cranky McCrankerton believes to be my sloppy parking job.  Lovely use of sarcasm, no?

•  I was aware that I had left a tight squeeze for Cranky McCrankerton, but felt that it was ok because:  all the spaces in this parking lot are very narrow;  and because I know that my doctor’s receptionist is a stickler for being on time— and I fear her wrath more than any anonymous van driver.

•  From this note I learned that Cranky McCrankerton is a flexible, able-bodied human being capable of entering his or her van from either side of the vehicle.

•  This fact suggests that I might be incorrect about my initial assumption re: the intent of this note.  In which case, I must conclude that this is a thank you note to me from Cranky McCrankerton.  Very succinctly worded, no?

•  So what do we think?

  1. Was this note– readable and polite as it is– really necessary?
  2. Do we think that it is possible that Cranky McCrankerton has lots of issues in his or her life?
  3. Should I feel bad about mildly inconveniencing someone who drives a vehicle that by its very size is always in the way?
  4. Tonight, when saying my prayers, will I include this anonymous person among my blessings for giving me the most unexpected laugh of my week?

… as usual, answers & discussion in comments below.  

Published by

Ally Bean

Observant. Creative. Humorous. Adaptable. Happy enough. Midwestern by chance. Kindhearted most days.

23 thoughts on “In Which My Parking Is Duly Noted”

  1. I’m guessing that anyone with a pad of paper in his/her MegaCar, writing notes like that, writes many notes to many people and thus, comes into your realm complete with issues galore. And judging by the picture on the paper, his/her still waters don’t run very deep, despite the calm on the surface. Yes, please pray that he/she, and the rest of the large van McCrankertons out there, find the “still waters” in which you and I happily paddle. Z-D.

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    1. I thought it was hilarious when I first read the note. It took me a while to realize that I was being insulted– and not complimented. I had done my very best to park in the last spot available, so I was rather proud of myself. But Cranky McCtrankerton sure wasn’t pleased with me.

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  2. 1. No.
    2. Abso-freakin-lutley!
    3. Nope!
    4. Yes, include Cranky McAssface in your prayers but not in the blessing category – more like in the category of those who truly need to know His kindness and compassion.

    Bean and Zen-Den – you are hilarious!! Paddle on!!

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  3. 1) Well at least Cranky blew off some steam in a non-violent way.
    2) I try to always assume that the Crankys of the world have issues over which I have no control.
    3) I’m in the “automatically feel bad” group but don’t you think that people like Cranky or the great big truck I had to try to park next to yesterday should be used to this?
    4) Sure. That simple act places you in the positive energy pool rather than poor Cranky’s anger pot.

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    1. Zazzy,

      1) Good point.
      2) Ain’t it the truth?
      3) I do think that they should be used to it.
      4) Don’t want to ever be in Cranky’s anger pot. [great phrase, btw]

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  4. Wow! I’m so glad this “person” didn’t take out their wrath on you by scraping your car or making a dent in your door. The notepad doesn’t match the sentiments at all! You should definitely not lose sleep over this.

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    1. Beth, I agree that not hurting my car was a good thing. I’ll take a strange note any day.

      But none of it makes much sense to me… especially if you saw how this parking lot is configured. There is one way in off a very busy street– and then you are there & must make the best of whatever parking spot you can find.

      Which I did, to the consternation of Cranky.

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    1. Margaret, I laughed when I first saw it, then worried that I’d really upset someone. Ultimately, I concluded that anyone who actually looked at this poorly planned parking lot would of known what happened– and that Cranky McCrankerton wasn’t paying attention to the big picture that day.

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  5. I once had my car registration tannoy-ed at the supermarket… would be owner of blue, blah blah, go to customer service desk.
    Fearing the worst and bright red I arrived at the desk to be greeted by a woman who claimed not to be able to get into her car because of how I had parked mine. Mine was parked badly, I giggled the long walk back to our cars. If she was slimmer she would have been able to do what Mr Cranky did. I guess at least he didn’t wait around.

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    1. gemma, what a funny story! I bet that woman was furious with you for parking badly– and for being slim enough to get in & out of your car without hassle. I was lucky that Cranky was limber and didn’t drag me out of the doctor’s office.

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  6. Vans, just by their size, are always parked badly as the completely take up a normal parking spot. Cranky should know this by now.

    (BTW- I’ve met Cranky’s cousin Cranky McCrankshaft. He’s usually parks his van in front of tire stores and quicky lube and oil change places.)

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    1. la p, I get what you’re saying here. 🙂 And you are right.

      If you drive a huge van, then you must accept that sometimes you will not fit comfortably into parking spaces. But Cranky didn’t see it that way and I have the note to prove it!

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  7. Driving and parking behaviour seem to have deteriorated markedly in recent years, in my opinion. It seems they can inconvenience everybody else because it’s their right to get to from a to b, but if someone has to inconvenience them, even mildly, then they get very upset, and write notes like this. Yesterday I was driving up a hill with cars parked on the other side. A small car came out of nowhere, way over the 30mph speed limit, past the parked cars and therefore onto my side of the road. I stopped, of course, who wouldn’t? But as he came past he just glared and shook his head at me like it was my fault. Incomprehensible! Thing is, he has to live with himself and his inadequacies every day, I only had the misfortune for a brief few seconds.

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    1. Yep. I think that slowing down while driving and remembering someone other than yourself when parking would be two great ways to bring some civility back. No one is perfect, but making the attempt to be couldn’t hurt anything, now could it?

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