Snippets Of Life

Guess Who Got Stopped In The U-Scan Lane, Again

/ Ally Bean / 11 Comments

While shopping in the grocery I noticed in the bakery section a box containing two giant chocolate brownies with caramel icing.  They looked delicious.  While not a healthy food choice, I had to have them.  No question about it.

When I went to check out of the store I used the U-Scan lane so, obviously, I ended up scanning these brownies across the machine.  I am a very good scanner.  Fast.  Efficient.  Attentive to the project at hand.

Which subsequently means that I’m also rather quick to bag the items that I scan.  I have a real competitive streak when it comes to this sort of thing.  Always trying to improve upon my personal best.  Planning ahead about where each item is going to go in the bag.

[Does anyone remember a My Name Is Earl episode in which Earl {Jason Lee} is helping some guy {Jon Heder} train for the grocery store baggers national competition?  And in the process of helping this guy both of them get hurt.  So, to have 2 functioning hands/arms they tied themselves together, and entered the competition as one contestant.  It was hilarious. But I digress…]

So I scanned the brownies, my last item, and wedged them into the bag.  It was perfect placement with everything nestled together just so.  I was happy, quietly congratulating myself on a job well done.  Until I realized that the man who maintained the U-Scan lane was walking toward me and shouting something at me.

Naturally, I said the first thing that came to mind which was: “huh?”  I’m sharp like that when I’m confused.

But the grocery store U-Scan man, un-phased by my eloquent retort, said to me:  “show me the brownies.”

Reluctantly, I disassembled my perfect bag to get to the brownies.  All the while I was wondering “why?” but figured that there was a reason, other than mental instability, that caused this grocery store U-Scan man to tell me to do this.  And there was.

Come to find out, the brownies had so much caramel icing on them that their weight had increased.  And the scanner, being a fussy little device that likes its UPC code and weight to match, wouldn’t register them as brownies.  Instead, the scanner said that I was trying to steal something.

Which, of course, I wasn’t.  But I had to prove this to the grocery store U-Scan man by showing him the brownies.  Which, of course, I did.

All of which brings me to the point of this post: any brownie that has so much caramel icing on it that it stops a scanner in its tracks is a very good thing to buy.  Worthy of many repeat purchases– wonky scanner be damned.

Trust me here, people.  These are words to live by.

[Click here to read about my previous encounter with the grocery store U-scan man.]

Hope Springeth Eternal In A Garden

/ Ally Bean / 15 Comments

The dianthus & salvia are in full bloom now.  After last autumn’s heavy rains that turned this planting bed into a mud pit, I didn’t know what to expect this spring.  But obviously the combo of rain + mild winter temperatures made for healthy plants with particularly intense colors.

Funny how things can work out for the best in a garden.

~ • ~

We planted this false blue indigo last summer but it didn’t thrive.  In the fall I was ready to pull it out because I thought that it was dead.  That’s how pathetic it looked.  But Zen-Den, who has much more patience with gardening than I do, said “let it be.”  He was right because look how vibrant this plant is now, and it’s not even in full bloom yet.

I just love being wrong about things like this.

~ • ~

I adore zinnias but have never had much success growing them from seed.  In fact a few years ago in a fit of frustration I said that I’d never try to grow them again.  But then I saw these starts at a garden center for a whooping $1.29 each, and I figured at that bargain price I had little to lose by trying once again to grow zinnias.

Wish me luck.  It could happen, right?

Yes, Yes, But NO!

/ Ally Bean / 19 Comments

THE RANT

•  Yes, it is wonderful that the home accessories & furniture that we purchased from Pottery Barn & L.L.Bean arrived on time or 4 days early.  And that all items were packed PERFECTLY… allowing for the inexplicable delivery incompetence that followed.

•  Yes, it is wonderful to know that $800.00 worth of merchandise can sit in our driveway in front of our garage door ALL NIGHT IN THE POURING RAIN without anyone or anything in our neighborhood stealing or destroying it.

•  But NO!, it is not wonderful to find out that UPS thought it was acceptable to leave said merchandise in our driveway without telling us that it was there.

THE EXPLANATION

In what is yet another example of the subtle irony that infuses my life, confuses my mind and exasperates my soul, Zen-Den got home from work some time before 6:00 p.m. last night.  [Rather unusual, but he knew that I was making scallops + orzo for dinner– and that boy is a nut for scallops.]  If he had come home later, as is his wont, then he would have stumbled over the boxes in front of the garage.  But, of course, that is not what happened.

I’ve had merchandise left in the driveway before, but in those situations the delivery person: 1) rang the bell;  2) knocked on the door;  &/or 3) left a post-it note attached to the sidelights around the front door so that it would be noticed from inside the house.  NONE of those things happened last night.

Instead, here’s what happened.  UPS delivered the merchandise some time after Z-D got home.  We know not when.  Both of us can testify that no one came to the door to alert us to the fact that our stuff was here.  Plus, being the reasonably prudent people that we are, we even opened the front door before going to bed to make sure that our new stuff wasn’t sitting on our front stoop or that there was a note stuck to our front door.

THE CONCLUSION

We were lucky that when we found the water-drenched corrugated cardboard boxes this morning at 7:00 a.m., they had held tight so that our two lamps + lamp shades AND three side tables DIDN’T suffer any irreparable damage.  However, I’m NOT HAPPY that my stuff was left out in the rain all night.  Would you be?

All of which brings me to the point of this rant.  UPS CAN DO BETTER.

And that, my friends, is all I have to say.  Thank you for listening.

###

[Photo on the left from Pottery Barn: Sutter Adjustable Lever Lamp + Linen Tapered Drum Lamp Shade]

[Photo on the right from L.L.Bean: Black Painted Cottage 2 Shelf Side Table]

[Well hello there FTC!  Very long time no see.  I haven’t been specific in my posts of late so there’s been no need for me to add this sort of disclaimer.  But today’s post is different, so let me assure you that I was in no way compensated for my opinions about the above items & situation.  We good?  Take care then.  See you later, no doubt.]

Life, Vacation Days & The Pursuit of Home-i-ness

/ Ally Bean / 12 Comments

Here’s the deal.

Zen-Den, who is usually a very organized sort of fellow, forgot to take one week of his vacation last year.  Well, to be fair, he didn’t exactly forget;  he wasn’t aware that he had another week of vacation until the last week of December when HR told him that he did.

Therefore, as per the rules of the company, Z-D is permitted [required?] to take his extra week of vacation this year.  Kind of nice that his workplace wants him to take all of his vacation days, isn’t it?  Even nicer that said workplace makes allowances for a clueless goof hardworking individual, such as Mr. Bean, to use his vacation days later… once he knows that he has them.

 

The upshot of all this is that this week we’ve decided to stay home and get some projects completed.

And man-oh-man do we have a doozy of a list of things to do around the house. Which means that when we’re not gardening, refinishing, hanging up things, caulking holes, painting trim {et cetera, et cetera}, we’ll be going for walks [maybe in city parks?] &/or just plain lollygagging on the screened-in porch [white wine spritzers, anyone?].


But here’s the thing.

There’s a very good chance that this is going to be the only blog post that I’ll write this week.  I actually have a few other topics to discuss with you, but I don’t see myself as having the time & energy & quietness that I need to put real words to virtual paper.  [I’m a very slow and deliberate writer.]

So now, having shared the who/what/when/where/why/& how of my upcoming week, I’m going to wander off, find Zen-Den and start. being. productive.  Later, kids– projects await me.

[As always, click on photos to embiggen.]