Alas and alack, I am saddened, dear Twitter, by thy inability to do what I want-eth you to do. Did I not make-eth thee my friend and confidant, lo these many long months?
Yet thee insist-eth on thwarting my every move regarding my profile description. Thy refusal to do as I want-eth you to do regarding punctuation on said profile description bespeak-eth of your inclination to be with bug. Here is what I desire-eth.
Yikes and away! Whither thou go-eth my beloved punctuation?
Verily I beg of thee, thy social media giant, to put-eth back my punctuation where I want-eth it. Not on the morrow, my liege, but on this very day.
Thanks be to thee, my provider of instant communication, for hearing the plea of thy humble user… BUT WAIT A MINUTE. What. hath. thou. done. now?
Forsooth and anon, I shall look-eth upon thy service as something very optional in my life. That is unless thy clean-eth up thy act and restore-eth my faith in thee, ye olde Twitter. Only then, will-eth we be friends and confidants again, I say-eth unto thee on this fine day.