A Report From The Sidelines Re: Neighbor Vs. Birds

/ Ally Bean

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[Note to readers: we live in a neighborhood with homes built on wooded ravine lots.  With many trees.  In which birds build nests, as they are wont to do.  These are facts.]

• • •

The neighbor woman who lives behind us has upped her anti-bird campaign.  She’s still out to chase all the birds away from her property, but she has a new tactic.

Now, in addition to her shouting and noise-making, she has begun to place bright shiny silver & red metallic streamers in her trees.

• • •

She wanders around her backyard throwing these streamers up into the air near tree branches.  Then when a streamer gets caught on a tree branch she loosely ties it to the branch, leaving yards of streamer fluttering in the wind.

This means that when the sun shines and hits the moving streamers, her backyard has bright lights randomly twinkling.  It reminds me of an old-fashioned used car lot, which I guess she thinks is a turn-off for birds.

• • •

I find this new behavior alternately entertaining or annoying.

What entertains me is that her neighbors on the property immediately beside her have put a large bird feeder on a shepherd’s hook.  They’ve positioned the shepherd’s hook in such a way that she’ll see the bird feeder ever time she steps outside onto her deck, but they cannot see it from their deck.

Don’t you just love passive-aggressive behavior?

• • •

However, what annoys me is that when the streamers are twinkling their brightest the light from them is strong enough to be noticed on our TV screen.  Inside the house.  Across the ravine.

Meaning that if we happen to be watching something on TV, our show has little sparkly red dots of color superimposed on it.  It’s kind of like stroking out without going to the bother of having a stroke.

Now how strange is that?

33 thoughts on “A Report From The Sidelines Re: Neighbor Vs. Birds”

    • Becky, if I lived beside her I’d do that. I don’t know what’s going on with this woman, but for some reason: birds bother her… so she bothers everyone else as she fights her battle against them.

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  2. Oh the joys of neighborhood livin’, eh? smh It reminds me of the folks who made the mad dash for property in the mountains in my home state (CO, by the way). They built these beautiful, McMansions in the wilderness, then would get mad when the elk, deer, bears, hawks, eagles, and other critters would come to check out the garbage, garden plots, and other vegetation they’d so carefully planted. There were even stories of the cougars and coyotes carrying off the designer sized dogs they seemed to be so fond of. I found it hilarious – trees mean birds, just as a mountain retreat means mountain dwelling critters in your yard. 🙂

    Good luck with the TV watching – here’s hoping the dots become less distracting as time goes by.

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    • Satin Sheet Diva, I’ve heard about those McMansions in CO, but not about the owners problems with wildlife. Talk about a clash of expectations! Maybe I could mention CO to this neighbor woman [if I ever meet her]. Sounds like her kind of place, filled with like-minded people. 😉

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    • Carrie, yep, those trees can serve many purposes when one is inclined to be on, what I suspect will be, an ill-fated anti-bird campaign. Of course, once all of the leaves fill in on the trees the sparkles will be fewer over here on our side of the ravine, so that’s good.

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  4. Now that’s just ridiculous! Why does she live where she does? Why doesn’t she move to the city into an apartment or condo? It’s like one of our neighbors in a previous neighborhood who cut down all the trees around his house because he was afraid they would fall on his house. He exposed his home to the blazing sun while we planted several more trees in our yard! This lady is crazy, sad and just plain silly! Good luck with the streamers.

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    • Beth, you said it! This is not the place to live if birds bother you. Obviously. However, she’s over there and I guess determined to bend nature to her will. Kind of waiting for her to get a gun and start shooting the birds. I suppose that’s the next step. *sigh*

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  5. Kind of sad isn’t it? Your biggest desire in life is to fight the birds. Too bad she couldn’t find a more worthwhile cause. I am sure there are as many in your community as our’s. Oh well… this is what makes neighborhoods “interesting” but also “frustrating”. Good luck TV viewing 🙂 Cheryl PS. Maybe the birds will finally drive her away. You can always hope.

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    • lovetotrav, this is very sad. You said it! I don’t know this woman at all, but I see and hear what she does. I don’t know if there’s some sort of mental health problem, or if she just has an odd hobby. Whatever, I say. But I do like your idea that the birds will win.

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  6. My neighbor across the street doesn’t like birds. (Who doesn’t like birds?) They cut down a wisteria tree and an arbor that it was trained on (very beautiful) because a catbird would build a nest every year. Sometimes there was bird poop on the walks (can you even imagine that????) They had a wonderful pond but were always trying to get rid of the frogs. Last year they took out the pond. We live next to a game preserve that’s protected. I can not figure out why they chose to live here. They are very nice people (they think I’m crazy — 4 cats, pond full of critters, 4 bird feeders, etc.). I think they are sterile. Oh yes, they cut down most of their trees. Now their yard and porch are too hot in the summer.

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    • nrhatch, you made me giggle. Thank you for a perfect comment. I hold no ill-will toward this woman, but it’s one of the most peculiar things we’ve had happen around here. Harmless to humans, I guess. Not so nice to birds, though.

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      • You made me giggle too ~ with your used car lot imagery.

        I shall a similar peculiar thing . . . we had neighbors form a Bird Patrol (like a Neighborhood Watch) with people taking assigned shifts armed with golf clubs. They would walk around at dusk, smacking tree trunks and waving their arms, to discourage cormorants from the roosting in the trees overnight. 🙄

        They asked me to join their ranks. I declined. I don’t think the biggest problem in our neighborhood is too many birds . . . it’s too many bird-brains! 😛

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  8. Interesting timing on reading your post! A bird just flew into our window and set off my dog barking. The bird was stunned and flew away unhurt after taking a moment to clear it’s little birdy head from the impact. Maybe I need streamers!

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  9. That would drive me NUTS. I would invest in a good black out blind to keep those twinklies off the TV, as well as grumble about the idiocy of those people who move into a wooded area and then don’t expect animals.

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    • Margaret, fortunately we don’t watch much TV! Plus once all the leaves fill in on the trees I think that 99% of the twinklies will be gone, at least until next November. But moving here and then fighting the birds seems goofy to me. Don’t quite get it.

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  11. Your neighbor makes me sad. I don’t know who I feel sorrier for in this whole mess, you, them, the birds, or the entire neighborhood.

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    • nance, it’s a weird situation all around. Harmless, really. But peculiar in a way that casts doubt on this woman’s sanity. I don’t know her & I’m not sure that I want to!

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    • Andra, indeed they are! Her behavior is baffling– and if nothing else gives me something to talk about on the blog! As for what her immediate neighbors think of her, I could not say. But bloggers seem to be in agreement that she’s nutty.

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  13. I love her passive aggressive neighbors. If she hates birds maybe she should move somewhere they are not. Like an apartment in a city. Or the desert. 🙂

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