I love when the absurd intersects with the ridiculous, and everything suddenly makes sense.
{ Classic TV: Catch the toast. Kiss the grapefruit. }
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I. Years ago Zen-Den and I were walking around a discount mall complex. It was crowded, we were walking slowly, and we chanced to overhear part of a serious conversation between two people who we didn’t know.
What we heard was: “We used the snot out of those oven mitts.”
We started laughing because neither one of us could imagine a scenario where you’d say this sentence with such earnestness. Of course Z-D and I, being who we are, immediately adopted this sentence as our favorite inside joke that means absolutely nothing, but it’s darned funny to say.
Don’t judge.
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II. I’ve been cooking and baking more this winter than usual. We didn’t decorate the house for the holidays, but instead I decided to be festive and make some foods that we especially like: stews, soups, casseroles, breads, biscuits.
Even though the holidays are over now, I’ve just kept on cooking.
All was going well in my happy little cooking world until our last oven mitt ripped in two. This left me with one square potholder and a dish towel to use when getting food out of the oven, and off the top of the stove.
I adapt. No big deal, right?
~ ~ • ~ ~
III. It didn’t concern me to not have any oven mitts because I was making do with what I had. It was only when Zen-Den walked into the kitchen and asked me what I was doing that I began to realize that this conversation was going to go somewhere funny.
I got the giggles but was able to explain the situation to him, and for the first time ever I was able to say in all truthfulness: “We used the snot out of those oven mitts, didn’t we?”
Thereby using our favorite absurd overheard sentence in a non-ironic way to describe the present ridiculous situation– and to finally understand why anyone would say that sentence to begin with.
Life is good.
It’s the circle of life. You just have to cotton to it.
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Good one, philmouse. Well said!
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And thus, the Bean Household became a Seinfeld episode.
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nance, yes it did. So unexpectedly. 😉
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I like the square potholders. Simple, easy and they used to be cheap. Now you can’t find them. They have fancy silicone or gloves or pockets (to keep your keys?). You can bet I am going to use the snot out of the ones I have.
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Kate, I’m learning about the new world of potholders and oven mitts. Having come to the conclusion that I need to buy some new ones, it’s been a revelation about what’s for sale out there. I agree with you, what’s with the pockets?
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Come to think of it, I’ve used the snot out of a lot of things in my life. It got me thinking of this verse from Cat Stevens’ song, “Oh Very Young”.
Oh very young, what will you leave us this time
You’re only dancin’ on this earth for a short while
And though your dreams may toss and turn you now
They will vanish away like your dads best jeans
Denim blue, faded up to the sky
And though you want them to last forever
You know they never will
(you know they never will)
And the patches make the goodbye harder still.
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bobcabkings, a perfect lyric for this post as I reflect fondly on our old oven mitts. Thank you for sharing it.
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Haha! Now you’re those people 😉 Girl, you need you some new mitts!
I have to have oven mitts. For all the baking I do, I am such a sissy about the oven! I have those silicone ones that go up to my elbows because I am a sissypants.
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joey, yes we are “those” people now. I just don’t know how that happened! I was at BB&B the other day and I saw the oven mitts that go up to the elbows. Didn’t purchase them, but had to admire the protection they’d provide.
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Haha! I used the snot out of mine so badly once that I asked for new ones for Christmas. I was desperate!
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lorriedeck, that does sound like a plea for help! Did Santa provide?
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Yes he did, he’s the bestest!
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I’ve got plenty of oven mitts if you want to come cook at my place. 🙂
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Carrie, I’m laughing here. Tempting offer…
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🙂
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I’ve used oven mitts until they’ve gotten holes in them (or until my husband burns his hands and yells about getting new oven mitts). I’m not a baker/cooker much and oven mitts seem like such a silly way to spend my money. We did get one of the new oven gloves as a Christmas gift for our daughter’s boyfriend. He likes to cook so…
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Janet, holy oven mitts, you say! The last ones we had split apart at the seams. I like to bake and cook, but only if I can move items around without burning myself. Call me fussy, huh?
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This was fun and almost poetic in outcome.
Do you think Lucy and Ricky did the toaster gag in one take?
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Maggie, I wondered about that, too. I suppose they did. I bet they practiced a few times, then shot the scene. Professional actors, you know!
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Thanks for making me laugh today:).
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Beth, you’re welcome.
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To every thing . . . there is a season . . . even for the most unlikely of phrases! So glad you remembered to use it when the time was ripe! Funny!
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nancy, it was one of those moments when everything came together, and there was laughter in the land. Lots of laughter.
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That is funny and ‘coincidental’ in all great ways. Ahhh, life loves to love at/with us. And if we get the joke, all the better. 👍
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roughwighting, I agree. All these years later I finally found out how it comes to be that someone would say that sentence. Nothing better than some silliness coming full circle.
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There is nothing better in a marriage than inside jokes. Way better than… um… other stuff. I have probably six pairs of oven mitts, but only one I use the snot out of.
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Janis, I know! I bet most successful marriages have a few inside jokes. And this particular one was so loony when we heard it, that it stayed with us. I’m jealous of your multiple oven mitt stash, even if only one of the mitts is snot-less! 😉
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I am one of those people who will use the snot out of inside jokes. No matter how tired some of them may seem, there are always new ways to work them humorously into life…
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evilsquirrel13, I knew there was something about you that I liked! Trust me when I say that we will continue to use our inside joke, now available with two stories to go with it.
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It is a funny phrase. That and beat the stuffing out of someone. Hm. If I mixed up the idioms, it would make more sense: “We used the stuffing out of those oven mitts.” Nyah. Not as good. Loved this!
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Rilla Z, I don’t know, I like your idiom. And in this sentence it works. However, the people who walked by us didn’t know your idiom, so they said what they said– and forever with us it remains! 😉
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Am I the only one who’s ever used this expression before? At least now I know we both speak the same language 😉
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Joanne, I’ve heard it my whole life, but some people aren’t aware of it. That’s the thing about language, we all speak the same one… except when we don’t!
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I’m married to a French-Canadian who speaks English as a second language. I know first-hand the challenges of speaking the same language … but not really 😉
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Snot is very gelatinous, so using the snot out of something makes sense. 🙂 I hate replacing things, so I also beat the snot out of my stuff.
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Margaret, a logical explanation of an absurd saying. Thanks, teach! 🙂 I don’t like shopping so I, too, use things for as long as I can– even longer sometimes.
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Hahahahaha.
http://www.qvc.com/Temp-tations-Old-World-Oven-Mitt-Set.product.K40805.html
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Tara, are you suggesting that I need to buy some of these finger-y oven mitts? They’re pretty wacky, but have a certain charm to them. 0.O
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They’re YUGE but really work. 🙂 Something new for you to get the snot out of.
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Gotta love those inside jokes with SO’s. Monica and I still laugh when we imagine someone giving that sincere “e-yawp” of approval. Barely ever remember where we first heard it, but it’s morphed into our own thing.
And that makes all the difference
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Gabe, oh I do love inside jokes, harmless ones, of course. I think they are part of the glue that binds two people together. E-yawp, I do indeed. 😉
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