A Glimpse Into Life With The Beans, Mid-Summer Edition

The Good

Zen-Den went to the grocery and bought everything on the list, including cornstarch.  This, as he pointed out to me, was a big deal because, as he said: “even five years ago I wouldn’t have known what cornstarch was– and would have bought corn meal instead.” 

Congratulations, darling.  You’ve passed GROCERY SHOPPING 201, an intermediate level course in advanced shopping techniques wherein husbands learn to buy exactly that which is written on the list.

Isn’t he something? Let’s give it up for the Z-D.

~ • ~

The Bad

Influenced by Mad Men [and a bit of nostalgia for my parents], I had a hankering for an Old Fashioned.  So I got out the bourbon and the sugar bowl in which I keep sugar cubes and the Angostura Bitters.  Then I made myself an Old Fashioned using the last of the bourbon.

While my drink sat on the counter below, as I attempted to put the sugar bowl back onto the cupboard shelf above, in a horrible moment of miscalculation, I knocked the lid off the sugar bowl.  It fell onto the counter, shattering into 3 gazillion + 1 pieces, many of which landed in my drink.

Leaving me distraught and drinkless.

~ • ~

The Ugly

Because of the excessive rain, we’ve not used our screened-in porch as much as we usually do in the summer.  However, the other evening there was no rain, so we decided to go out there to sit.

Almost immediately we both noticed that there were ants walking around on the rug in the screened-in porch.  This is amazing because the porch is up a story from the ground below, but those miserable, icky, sneaky, destructive ants were on. my. porch.

I took off one of my Birks, grabbed it with my hand and started hitting the ants until they stopped moving.  I put the sandal back on when I thought that I’d killed all the ants, but I hadn’t.  So when I saw one last ant moving, in a fit of anger, I stomped down really hard with my sandaled foot on the last ant… and twisted my left ankle in the process.

I hate ants.

~ • ~

Published by

Ally Bean

Observant. Creative. Humorous. Adaptable. Happy enough. Looking for the crumb of truth in the cookie of life.

24 thoughts on “A Glimpse Into Life With The Beans, Mid-Summer Edition”

  1. The Good: I hope ZD does a little Freestylin’ at the market. That’s when the Fun really happens.

    The Bad: Enter The Strainer! I have several, and a really fine mesh could have saved you. (Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda…I know. Sigh.)

    The Ugly: Ugh. Ants. I’ve already bemoaned this Summer Of Bugs. My heart goes out to you and your ankle. Ice it up and rest on your porch. Good excuse now.

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    1. nance, Z-D is an expert at freestyling at the grocery, which makes this last shopping trip even more amazing. He stayed on point.

      Never thought of a strainer! You are a genius.

      I don’t care about the parable about how great ants are, I don’t like ’em. At all. They just cause me trouble.

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  2. Zen Den is amazing! I can’t trust my hubby to get everything on the list. I’ve given him too many tries. He is always distracted by everything BUT what is on the list. He loves going to the grocery!
    So sorry about your drink debacle. I just hope you got all the shards picked up and don’t find one in the bottom of your foot!
    Ants are relentless. They were trying to get to higher, drier ground. Just be thankful they weren’t huge cockroaches we get here! Good luck with the ankle. OUCH!!

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    1. Beth, Z-D likes to go to the grocery, too. He often ad libs while he’s there, but this last time he done good.

      I was super careful about getting the chards off of the counter and the floor. You know how those little things always find their way into my feet. I’m like a magnet for anything sharp in the kitchen.

      You are so right about cockroaches. Hadn’t thought of that. Suddenly I’m trying to think positive thoughts about the ants. Well, not really.

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  3. Ants need a good dose of Raid or something of that nature. I keep the bait traps around the front walls year round because the flower beds outside are full of the little bastards, and they love to congregate in my windowsills whenever it rains…

    If all else fails, get a magnifying glass and burn baby burn…

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    1. evilsquirrel13, we put out ant traps and within a day there seem to be no more ants. I agree though. We need to get a can of Raid to keep around the house for future emergencies. And a magnifying glass, of course. 😉

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  4. Congratulations to Z-D! I once asked my dad to bring home half and half and he brought home some kind of butter. I like butter, but not in my coffee.

    So sorry about your drink – I’m not sure I’d drink it even filtered. Powdered glass can be dangerous. Another day, a fresher, non glass-infused beverage.

    Ant-bait won’t fix your ankle but it’ll take care of the ants. I had sugar ants when I got home this spring – who knows where they came from. Ant-bait had them gone in days while Cindy is still struggling through multiple sprayings.

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    1. Zazzy, it was a big day for Zen-Den… knowing the difference btwn cornstarch and corn meal!

      I’ll eventually buy some more bourbon and try the drink again. After breaking the sugar bowl lid I had to order a new one, which is insult on injury.

      We got some ant traps and the little buggers are gone now. I hope permanently. I really don’t like ants.

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  5. It’s an invasion – fighting them in a couple of very large pots (too big to pick up and put a saucer under so you can water moat the plant. Let the battle begin!
    (Hope the ankle is better – nothing worse than a twisted on the porch story)

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  6. Hope your ankle is doing better. As for Zen-Den, well done! When I send my husband to the store the only rule I have for him is to NOT bring back anything he has never seen me eat. He is good about giving me a call if he is not sure about something on the list.

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    1. la p, I like your rule. Z-D is great at getting everyday items, but cornstarch is a once-in-a-while product that, this time, didn’t stump him. Progress, eh?

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  7. This is a WHOLE lot of Murphy’s Law going on. I hope your ankle isn’t too badly twisted! Did you at least smash the ant? In an ironic twist of fate, as we swelter in our drought, I’m leaving for Thailand next Wednesday where it is MONSOON season. Oh, yay! 😦

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    1. Margaret, my ankle is doing fine. A day of not walking much has allowed it to heal. I did murder the ant, so maybe it was worth it!

      It’s monsoon season over there right now? How lucky for you. I trust you’ll photograph it all– but stay safe while doing so.

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