Not Slowing My Roll In Time: Baffled, Bothered, And Bugged

/ Ally Bean

Introduction

HAVE you ever watched something happen in front of you but it doesn’t immediately register what is really happening in front of you, yet you sense something’s not right, THEN when you realize what’s really happening in front of you it’s too late to stop it from happening right in front of you, so you watch in horror, or disgust, while what is happening in front of you happens?

That’s what this post is about.

Baffled

THIS is what happened in front of me as I stood in the kitchen waiting for the early morning coffee to brew.

Having taken the roller shade remote control out of the drawer where it is stored…

Having pushed the buttons that open all four roller shades at the same time so that I could see our backyard aka the forest primeval…

Having become aware that there was a dark smudge on one of the roller shades that was rolling up…

Having sudden realized that the dark smudge was animated moving downward as the shade went up…

Bothered

THEN realizing that the dark smudge was a stink bug that had somehow gotten inside the house from the forest primeval and was on the back side of one of the roller shades.

Where it was caught in the upward roller action of the opening shade…

Where if I’d been quicker I could have grabbed the remote control from the drawer to stop the shade from rolling up but…

Where because of my slowness to understand and act promptly the unfortunate stink bug was slowly smooshed into a lumpy mess…

Where the dearly departed bug left an actual dark smudge for real.

Bugged

THAT forced me to forego my first cup of morning coffee while I frantically attempted to clean the remains of the bug off the roller shade.

Which was now stained with a smelly dark smudge that required a gentle removal of bug guts using a damp paper towel…

Which lead to a light dabbing of club soda attempting to get the bubbly water to flush out the bug guts from within the weave of the roller shade fabric…

Which was followed by a fast Google search about how to remove a stain from a roller shade…

Which culminated in creating a mild solution of Woolite Laundry Detergent + cool water that when applied with a microfiber towel removed most of, but not all of, the bug gut stain.

Conclusion

AND with that glimpse into my life I’ll say “good day” to one and all, hoping that your day doesn’t involve stink bug guts, but if it does may it happen after you are fully awake, cognizant of what is really happening right in front of you as it happens, so that you may slow your roll in time.

Unlike me.

• 🌹 •

I’m back everyone. How ‘ya doing?

Anything in particular bugging you lately? Do tell!

• 🌹 •

239 thoughts on “Not Slowing My Roll In Time: Baffled, Bothered, And Bugged”

  5. I’ve never heard of a stink bug before, but I’m presuming it is appropriately named. My sympathies Ally, but also admiration that you swung into action, especially *before* coffee.

    Welcome back. I’m dipping my toe back into a bit of reading & commenting, but am holding posting in abeyance until after my cataract surgery.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Deb, maybe stink bugs are only in North America, I don’t know much about them other than they move slowly, have hard shells, and when squished they stink to high heaven. Hence the name.

      I’m pleased you decided to read and comment here, all things considered. May your surgery be a success. Happy New Year!

      Liked by 2 people

  6. Welcome back Ms. Bean! I’ve missed you and your flapadoodle. I am, however, so sorry about the stink bug but I have to admit that when you described the moving smudge my brain went immediately to bighairyspider and I thought perhaps you were about to move house.

    Stink bug stain is better than bighairyspider loose in the house. At least in my mind.

    I hope you had a delightful holiday, free of other stink bugs and whatnot.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Hopefully the bug’s new year’s resolution wasn’t to “Roll with the punches.” Sorry. Too soon? My guess is you’ll always see that stain, even if it’s been removed. Happy New Year, Ally!

    Liked by 4 people

  8. That happens more frequently than you might think, especially BEFORE coffee. Usually my “way too late” response is “NO, NO, NO!” That never helps. Woolite plus Oxy spray is good for biological spots. I’ve sprayed it on blood stains and watched the color fade out in seconds. Welcome back from your winter solstice hiatus!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Kate, I’m sure that had this happened after some caffeine I’d have been faster to grasp what was going on. I didn’t think of Oxy sprain to remove the stain, I was not exactly at my sharpest. Good to be back in this new year.

      Liked by 2 people

  9. I couldn’t help but laugh at your predicament😹 It made me think of some song one of my great aunts taught me that had the phrase, “greasy, grimy gopher guts.”

    Liked by 3 people

    • I like the alliteration, too! Sadly, I can’t come up with a word for bug that starts with an s (haven’t had my breakfast yet…), so stinky, smeary, superbug stain is the best accompaniment I could come up with to the “baffled, bothered, and bugged” (yay Oxford comma 🙃)

      I’m curious: was the stain stinky as the name implies?

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Oh no! I am glad it wasn’t a mouse. I thought the black smudge that was then MOVING was perhaps a mouse. Still, ick and having to deal with the stain? No fun.

    I am bugged by the fact that I took a brand new pair of green jeans from the dryer the other day and found that they have streaks of blue on them – like not quite tie-dye looking, but not normal at all. I don’t know what happened. I first thought it was detergent that had dried on them, so I rewashed. Still blue streaks. Maybe something else in the wash bled on them, but nothing else in the load was ruined. I’m stumped and upset. My kids say anything does and it is mostly on the lower legs, so I can still wear them. I’m upset because I paid full price for them. This was the first time I washed them. Ugh.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Ernie, a mouse would have been the death of me and I’d not be here to write about it.

      That’s peculiar about your jeans. I’ve had some fade out but never streak a different color. In a way it’s kind of cool, but also not what I’d expect from new jeans. Sorry but maybe you’ll start a new trend.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Arrgh! All this before the first cup of morning brew? Double horrors! I’ve had stink bugs make a home in the cozy crevices of my Savannah shades and gone after them with the end of a metal tape measure hoping that I wouldn’t shred the shade in the process. If I mooched one inside a “slat” it would be curtains for the shades!

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Stink bugs have been bad the last couple of years, and it always amazes me to find one inside and attempting to set up residence. I kill them all, but thankfully not inside a shade. 🙂 This time of year, politics bug me – ads, calls, texts. Just go away. I’ll show up like usual and pull the lever, but let me do my own research without all the BS. Sorry you asked, I’m sure. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Judy, we’ve had more than our share of stink bugs here too. Not a fan of them, don’t know how they get inside, but don’t like it.

      I’m with you about too much politics everywhere I turn. I can figure things out on my own, too. I don’t need all the noise, prefer to find my own signal.

      Liked by 2 people

  16. For a moment as snakes are common here I envisaged a snake but no it was a stink bug of which I am not familiar but given the name I can guess I hope remainder of your day went much better…Happy New Year, Ally 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Happy New Year!

    I don’t think we have stink bugs in Canada? Like I didn’t know they were actually a thing?

    Hmmm. Nothing is bothering me today. I had a wonderful Christmas with my family, and I am sliding into 2024 with much more optimism than I did 2023. I feel like there is ominous music playing somewhere in the background (a la Jaws: like I don’t know it, but a man-eating shark is hovering nearby), but at least I will face whatever inevitable horrors come my way with a starting place of positivity?! Oops. That last statement revealed my inner pessimist, I suppose.

    Glad to have you back in blog land 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    • Elisabeth, honestly I don’t know much about stink bugs other than they’re a nuisance and when bothered, or murdered as it were, they emit an awful scent. Hence the name.

      I’m pleased that you’re entering the new year optimistically but with a bit of caution. That’s my approach to 2024 too. I hear that Jaws theme song too, but refuse to give it any credence. I’d say we’re being pragmatically positive!

      Liked by 1 person

  18. I’m still back at the remote control for the roller shades. Occasionally, something alerts me to the fact that I’m living in an alternate universe, and this sure did. I don’t have a single remote control in my house, or any sort of device that could use a remote control. On the other hand, I don’t have squished stink bugs, either. They’re truly the worst, and I fully sympathize with your frozen horror. On the other hand, now I’ve learned a few new tricks for getting stains out.

    As for the experience, it seems like watching that shade would have been exactly like watching some “thing” go overboard: a screwdriver, a radio, a piece of rigging. You know it’s going to deep six, but there’s not a thing to do but watch as “it” gracefully arcs into the water. I still miss my lime green handled ratcheting screwdriver.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Linda, I became aware of motorized roller shades a while back and decided that when we got new shades in the kitchen, I was going to get ones that operate with a remote control. We’ve had them a few years now, and aside from this stink bug incident, love them.

      You’re right about watching things go overboard. This scenario was exactly like that, slow motion, out of my control and oddly disconcerting, while at the same time not entirely registering how this could be happening. I’m sorry about your ratcheting screwdriver, my it RIP.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Anne, it’s fun to be back to blogging. I feel renewed after a break.

      As for stink bugs, they somehow get inside the house and show up in the darnedest places. Not a fan of them, but whatcha gonna do? In my case look for them on the shades before I roll them up.

      Liked by 2 people

  20. Welcome back Ally Bean! Look at the hilarious story that bug allowed you to tell for your first post back. He/she gave their life to provide this laugh and your own self-deprecating analysis of the moments. I think this calls for a small memorial to be erected near the window, a place to reflect and thank that departed stink bug for the heroic gift of this post topic 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  22. Having a stink bug immortalized forever on your shades is not ideal. But at least you gave an excellent description of how our brains interpret information…on a Monday, with no coffee. And truly, it could be worse (says the woman who did not see the skunk in her yard fast enough to tackle her dog before he also saw it).

    Liked by 2 people

    • AutumnAshbough, your skunk/dog episode is far worse than watching a stink bug get smooshed, but it is the same sort of situation. You don’t get what’s happening and then when you do, well in our cases, a stench. I can “if only” this all I want, but the reality is that stink bug guts are forever embedded in a small dot on our roller shades.

      Liked by 2 people

  23. What does it say about me that I knew exactly what you were saying as I was reading? Not that I have remote-controlled rollers in my house but this could have happened even if you were manually pulling the strings, yanno? Like you pull but as you realise, your movement is still, well, in movement and before you can grab the other string to reverse the action, the damage is done.
    RIP Stinkbug. Thank you for your sacrifice and giving Ally her first blog topic of the year…
    Speaking of which, Happy New Year! I hope your Christmas holidays were fabulous and you are well rested and ready to take on whatever comes your way (stinkbugs, notwithstanding).

    Liked by 2 people

    • Dale, good point about how this situation could also happen with a manual roller and I’d have not figured it out until it was too late. The stink bug was doomed no matter how the shade went up. Overall, considering how many stink bugs manage to get inside the house, I’m surprised this hasn’t happened before. It was ridiculous but did prompt me to get blogging again, so *yay* to the stink bug?

      Happy New Year to you, too.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Deborah, while we did have what I needed to remove bug guts from a roller shade, the stuff wasn’t purchased for said activity. I like a vodka & soda occasionally and I wash winter wool scarves with Woolite, so for once [by accident] I had what I needed here yet hope I shall never need to use again to remove bug remains from anywhere.

      Happy New Year to you, too.

      Liked by 2 people

  25. Probably there’s some rule of thumb about how killing a stinkbug is good luck for the new year… “Squish a stinkbug, serendipitous season in store.” That’s a real adage, I’m sure of it.

    Welcome back! Was your blog break restorative?

    Liked by 3 people

  26. Classic Spectacled Bean material here, Ally. If only I couldn’t relate. The annual Miller moth migration through Colorado, where the moths inexplicably STILL get into the house despite closing every opening in the structure, leads to little dots of moth poop everywhere… including the roller shades. The stuff is impenetrable, to where you’re repainting surfaces instead of cleaning them. Regardless, I’m gonna try the Woolite + water suggestion. (they still make Woolite, huh?) I don’t want to depart this world thinking the moths got the upper hand, er, wing.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Dave, I didn’t know about your moth problem, but can understand why it bothers you. Let me say “ick” and leave it at that. I don’t know if Woolite + water will be effective, but it’s worth a try. The solution did a fairly good job on the roller shade, penetrating into the weave filled with bug guts. Plus it smells a heck of a lot better than the scent of a recently deceased stink bug.

      Liked by 1 person

  28. So…while the episode made for an unsettling start to your morning, the stink bug’s morning was much, much worse. Just goes to show that everything is relative.

    Good to see you back in blogland, Ally!

    Liked by 3 people

  29. Happy New Year Ally! Thursday a week ago, I headed out to get a couple caramel cold brew coffees (for me) and a hot chocolate (for Mrs. Chess). Three cups of liquid to be safely navigated back to the house, placed oh-so-carefully in a cardboard carrier. On the return trip, I hit a right turn a little too hard and the carrier tipped over. In traffic, I continued to drive forward while my coffees ran southward…into the floor mat and floor respectively. I periodically looked down and had a great seat watching the creation of a caffeine pond in my car. My wife was quite pleased her hot chocolate returned intact (100% lid). She was less pleased we had to sop up the cold brew, air dry the floor mat, etc.

    Liked by 2 people

    • E.A. Wickham, we only have the automatic roller shades in the kitchen and they’re nice, especially when the sun shines too brightly into the area when I’m cooking and I want to close the shades to get the glare out of my eyes. In that case I don’t have to stop what I’m doing, I just hit a button. However I never envisioned that the motorized shades could murder a stink bug. Very efficiently in fact. Happy New Year to you, too.

      Liked by 2 people

  31. Happy New Year! Oh, not a pleasant thing to wake up to, but I did have to smile as I was reading your post and how you made such a good point out of an incident with a stink bug. Yes, sometimes we do not notice what is right in front of us! May the rest of your day hold pleasant surprises in front of you. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • joyroses13, I was flummoxed at first when I realized what had happened, but then my pragmatic self took over wanting to save the shade. Those things cost a fortune, so getting the remains of the bug off was my priority. If nothing else I learned something new and got a blog post out of it. Win, win.

      Liked by 1 person

  32. When my nephew was 2? 3? little, regardless, he was in the family room alone playing nicely with a puzzle. There were SIX adults in the next room (open floorplan, we had eyes on him the whole time) when he suddenly got up and started toddling towards the stone fireplace and then we all watched as his little shoe got caught on a puzzle piece and his whole body was pitching straight towards the fireplace. All six of us ran in unison, but it was too late. His wails echoed. He had a bruise, but nothing worse, but it seemed like the whole event happened in slow motion.

    But, man, the smell of a stink bug before your morning coffee? What a disaster!

    Liked by 2 people

    • NGS, that is such a story. I can only imagine how panicked all the adults were to grab him before he hit the fireplace. I’m glad it was only a bruise, but it’s a heart-stopping story. No doubt it seemed like it was in slow motion.

      And yes, stink bug aroma is no way as pleasant as coffee aroma.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Jenn, I don’t know how these stink bugs get inside but they do. They move slowly so I can usually get them with a tissue but the fast roller action of the shade was no match for it– or me.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Janis, yes no doubt the stink bug is looking down from heaven, pleased to know that its demise is the muse for this blog post that could be the epitome of the flapdoodle and twaddle I share here.

      Liked by 1 person

  35. Hi Ally, good to see you back. I have definitely experienced that ponderous-realisation-too-slow-to-react-well situation, usually when I’m tired or before coffee. Ugh. If you still have a stain, you could try a mild bleach solution of 7/8 water and 1/8 bleach and then flush with plain water. You could test the solution on a hidden part of the blind to see if there is a negative reaction.

    Happy New Year! I hope 2024 is kind to you with a minimum of bug disasters and no lower back pain. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Lynette, it was odd to sort of realize what was happening, but not quite get what was happening. I’m better after a cup of coffee, but don’t usually feel like I need to be alert while standing in my kitchen while the coffee brews. Yet look what happened in the roll of a shade, a stink bug died and I learned how to remove bug guts from the weave of a shade. All before a drop of caffeine entered my system. Thanks for the idea about stain removal.

      Happy New Year right back at ‘ya. Hoping for a healthy year filled with good vibes.

      Liked by 2 people

  36. Most importantly, how did you have the capacity to do that during the interruption of your coffee. Or did you get to your coffee first and just aren’t telling us that? No shame if you did. I’m not even sure I’d find the Woolite without coffee and let’s face it, how many places could it be?

    Liked by 2 people

  37. Happy New Year, Ally! Stink bugs sound gross. I don’t know that I’ve ever seen one before and after how you describe them, I’m pretty happy about that. I was just watching bits of a hoarding episode at my MILs while I made her breakfast and there was an episode where the house was covered in cockroaches and it was disgusting. Guess I’ll be seeing bugs all day today. Glad you are back. Hope you had a wonderful set of holidays.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Janet, stink bugs are slow-moving little prehistoric-looking bugs with a shell. They can fly if they want, but not very far. They’re not as horrifying as cockroaches, just annoying. I prefer to not see them inside the house but they get in. I’d rather see lady bugs, at least they’re cute. Happy to be back to blogging, hoping you had a good holiday season too.

      Liked by 2 people

  39. If I were a stink bug, I’d try to get into your warm, cozy house too. Glad a “solution” presented itself. Cute story.

    How am I doin’?
    Well, pretty well, considering I had two eye shots this morning to preserve my vision. The blurriness from dilation is almost gone now, praise God! You can find more family doings on my blog this week. HAPPY NEW YEAR, ALLY!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Marian, dealing with a dead stink bug wasn’t on my bingo card for things to accomplish this year but I’ve dealt with it now.

      I’m glad you’re seeing more clearly now, but sorry you had to get shots to make it happen. Not something I’d enjoy but then again if they help, yay. Looking forward to catching up with everyone in the coming weeks.

      Liked by 2 people

  41. Welcome back Ally. I’ve plenty of things which bother me, but I won’t be that stink bug that smudges up one of the brightest spots on the internet. Hope you had a wonderful holiday season.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Johnny, aren’t you sweet! Thanks for the compliment about this blog and thanks for not being a stink bug. [Now that’s a sentence I don’t think I’d ever have envisioned writing ever.]

      Liked by 1 person

  43. GAG. we had a stink bug crawling on the outside of the fireplace, and when my husband tried to grab it, it fell inside the glass enclosure… EEK! i didn’t want him to take the glass out to get the bug, and figured it would be incinerated the next time i turned on the gas fireplace (i never saw him again … and much easier fix than what you went through).

    Liked by 2 people

    • ren, call me callous but I rather enjoy the idea of a stink bug being incinerated. They get in everywhere, don’t they? I got most of the stink bug guts removed from the shade BUT only time will tell if the sun will bleach the last dot of smudge that is still slightly visible.

      Liked by 2 people

  44. Lol. I know the feeling. On Boxing Day, as the troops left for an outing and I prepared to put my feet up and breathe out, I set a tray with a glass teapot on the banister FOR ONE SECOND. It crashed down 2 floors, staining the freshly painted white walls with tea and smashing glass in puddles all down the wooden stairs. Finally got most of it up but still keep finding bits of glass. And boy, aren’t those bugs just gross?

    Liked by 2 people

    • MELewis, oh you have my condolences on your teapot incident. What a mess to clean up, everywhere, and for days on end. I’d be flummoxed beyond consolation and also darned determined to get every bit of glass before I stepped on it. And yes, stink bugs are gross looking– and unwanted inside my house.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Linda, we had more stink bugs than normal last year too. I don’t know how they get inside, but once inside I usually find them before they get caught up in anything of value. Like that motorized roller shade.

      Liked by 2 people

      • I’m still trying to figure out how we get yellow jackets in the house every winter. (This year they are joining the continuing influx of lady bugs.) The cats are quick to bring the presence of bugs to our attention.

        Liked by 2 people

        • Yellow jackets in the house? Oh that is weird and I’d guess kind of scary. I like lady bugs, they wouldn’t bother me. When we had cats, like you said, they were helpful about pointing out bugs. No cats now, so I have to find the bugs myself.

          Liked by 2 people

    • Crystal, I don’t know when I’ve been so surprised by something so stupid as having a stink bug murdered by your roller shade. It could only happen to me, I suppose. Happy New Year to you, too!

      Liked by 2 people

  49. Ah, stink bugs! They are indeed nasty creatures and I’ve squished (unfortunately) and captured/released many of them, mainly at my mom’s. I didn’t know they stained though! Isn’t their stench bad enough? Hope the spot fades so that it doesn’t bug the crap out of you. (see what I did there?)

    Liked by 2 people

    • Margaret, now that you mention your Mom’s house I wonder if some houses appeal to stink bugs more than others. Their guts made a smudge that is discernible even after my efforts to clean it. However summer sunshine may fade it, or at least that’s what I’m hoping for.

      Liked by 1 person

  50. Gross! Did it smell really bad? I have definitely smashed some bugs that smell really bad afterward and I wish that I would have used a napkin or done it outside. I once smashed a bug against my tent wall and then I had to sleep that night with the scent of bug in the air. Not great.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Kyria, it smelled awful for about a minute then was just icky to clean up. Not a fan of bug guts. I wouldn’t like the scent of bug inside a tent for sure. At least in a house there’s room for the stink to dissipate, but you were trapped.

      Liked by 1 person

  51. We have an invasion of the lady bugs. I keep finding them everywhere. Your stink bug story reminds me of helping my oldest grandson clean his bedroom. He has a top (but no bottom) bunk bed. He was up there straightening out something when he spotted a stink bug on the ceiling. He grabbed it and threw it behind the bed, in a space where I couldn’t get it. I asked him why he did that and he said he has a collection of them back there. Ack, and boys! I’m sorry about the gut stains and hope they fade away.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Robin, our previous house used to get lady bugs. Unlike stink bugs, they’re cute, if nothing else. Rather funny about your grandson’s “collection” of stink bugs. Who would think to do that! I’m hoping summer sunshine will fade the last remnant of bug gut from the weave.

      Liked by 1 person

  54. Oh good golly. Hello, dear Ally Bean. I so missed you. Not the ‘stink bug guts’ but you…and your tales of daily this-and-that…delightful and in this case, stinky. I think I caught a whiff over here…due West of you. Hope you had a wonderful holiday. Happy New Year to you, dear one! 🥰

    Liked by 2 people

  56. I’ve done a lot of strange things before my morning coffee kicked in but never inadvertently squished a stink bug! I believe there’s an award somewhere!

    I think I would have reached for the vinegar.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Jan, I admit the situation caught me off guard in all ways. If I’d been more alert it wouldn’t have happened, but it was pre-coffee. I will not blame myself for this.

      I didn’t think of the vinegar, yet it makes sense. Next time, which I hope never happens, I’ll keep it in mind. The whole thing, so stupid.

      Liked by 1 person

  57. In our family, we call these incidents ‘watching a train wreck’. Nothing you can really do about it as it happens and probably no way to ever completely clean up the mess.
    We had one a few years ago. The family was playing cards and one of them realized that the very large dog in the room was eyeing the top of the table with great curiosity. And then, before anyone could react, the very large dog was on top of the table – and most of what had been on the table was on the floor.
    Now, they could have scolded the dog, and perhaps they did, but not before everyone had their phones out and were taking pictures. And the dog had layed down and was wondering what all the fuss was about.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Margery, that’s a funny story. I’m smiling here. I bet that dog loved all the attention and his people got wonderful photos. Watching a train wreck is exactly what was going on with the stink bug being smooshed. I was aware but detached too.

      Liked by 2 people

  58. Welcome back, Ally! Happy New Year 🎈🎊 too. That was a rude way to start the day, for sure. Not much bugging me at the moment. Though when I was visiting my brother in Cleveland, I woke one morning with a round red spot on the inside of my right forearm. Sure looked like a bug bite of some sort and grew on size – only just now faded away a month later. What’s weird is it never stung, hurt, itched or felt like anything. If I couldn’t see it, I’d never have known it was there. Maybe it’s something devious and left offspring growing inside a la Alien. Eek.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Eilene, that’s one weird bug bite, or alien invasion. Who knows what it could have been but as long as you’re feeling well now I’d guess you’re okay. Cleveland is often called the Mistake on the Lake, but I’ve never heard anyone suggest it’s where aliens have landed. Happy New Year!

      Liked by 2 people

  59. I loved this, Ally, Although I was afraid at first it would be a snake. I don’t think I’ve ever encountered a stink bug. I wonder if they live around here.

    For some reason, all three of my girls are fast to react. They must have got that from my husband. I fear that I’m slow even after my coffee.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Nicki, snakes are worse than stink bugs. I don’t know exactly where stink bugs roam in North America but they’re unique looking bugs. I’m smiling about your slow reaction time. I relate to that, coffee or no coffee some of us just don’t go fast.

      Liked by 1 person

  60. Nice to have back, kid. Don’t get an enormous head. Everybody’s a kid to me. 😊

    I don’t know why your stink bug story made me think of this, but here goes. I used to paint houses in the summer when I wasn’t teaching. One day I was painting a two-story house. The homeowners had a deck off their second-floor bedroom. I was on an extension ladder,and manipulating my narrow brush into the crack where the deck nearly met the house, when I hit something with the brush. A split second later, a bat flew out and whizzed by my head. It was a miracle I didn’t fall off the ladder. As it flew away, I saw the white stripe down its back. I laughed, envisioning the bat coming home to his wife and saying, “You’ll never imagine what happened to me today.”

    Liked by 2 people

    • Pete, OH NO, not a bat! It’s a miracle you didn’t fall off the ladder. We get bats around here and they like to hang out around one particular spot on the underside of our deck. I adore the idea that you painted a stripe on its back. That’s too funny. Wonder what his wife had to say about it when he told her what had happened. Great story.

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  61. Happy new year Ally! Well, it’s bad enough to smash the guts of a bug-bug, but a stink bug – ewww. I have never come face to face with a stink bug but we have them around here and I’ve seen pictures. I, on the other hand, am Lucky Pierre when it comes to encounters with multi-legged critters that run like … well, they run very fast. 🙂 I throw up my hands in despair and scream. Why did Noah let any kind of bugs onto the ark anyway? What a way to start the day and your coffee got cold on top of it. Nothing is bugging me at this particular moment … the fireworks in the neighborhood that went until 1:00 a.m. two nights in a row to welcome 2024 are now silenced, as is the Bijon Frise next door who howls inside her house for her owner all day long directly under my kitchen window, the room where I sit from 11:00 a.m.-ish until 10:00 p.m.-ish. I am a person who seems to dislike noise the older she gets.

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    • Linda, stink bugs are everywhere around here when the temps get warm enough to bring them out but not too hot to roast them. No actual temp numbers to use, just my observation. I don’t hate on the bugs, just prefer them outside rather than inside and alive rather than smushed. They are odiferous as per their name.

      I don’t like noise either. I’ve always been this way, it’s part of being highly sensitive. I’m sorry for the lonely dog, but more sorry for you sitting there hearing it. Yet, whatcha gonna do?

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      • I can deal with bugs better outside than inside … it’s their habitat, but not in here with me. It was always quiet at our house, especially after my father left (he, who would have the stereo playing all day Sunday). Well, I finally got some noise cancelling headphones to wear to help block the noise, but it doesn’t work completely and I take them off to give me ears a break from the suction. I don’t like having the radio on all the time either.

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        • I like quiet, too. I listen to music off and on during the day, but not all the time. Your headphones help a little bit at least. I’m sorry you deal with unwanted noise. That’d be frustrating.

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          • I listen to the news too much because I hate putting the radio on and then something loud comes on … during the day I don’t care for it, but I will put the radio on in the car (for music) if nothing else is on, especially college football weekends, when they preempt programming for eight hours straight. The dog is even worse in the Summer when the windows are open. I don’t want ear plugs as I don’t want to damage my ears.

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    • Annika, stink bugs are ridiculous to begin with but even more so when they get caught in roller shades. Hoping you’re right and this was a one-off for bug calamity in my life this year. Happy New Year!

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  65. I’m still stuck on the “remote control roller shade” detail. Maybe it’s because it’s 5:00 am but I can’t move past this. It feels like something from the future, are you living in the future, Ally?
    Now I see Jennie’s comment above and “coffee first” is a sentiment I will echo! Also, I have no idea what a stink bug looks like. Shall I google?

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    • Nicole, remote control roller shades are useful but not inexpensive. 🙄 We got them for the kitchen because when you’re cooking/baking and the sun is glaring into the kitchen it’s more efficient to hit one button to close all the shades than to stop cooking and manually do so. THUS the indulgence of a remote control.

      Jennie is right, of course. If I’d just waited until after I’d had some coffee I’d have realized sooner that the smudge was a stink bug. They’re about 1/2″ long, look like little prehistoric tanks, are dark brownish black, and true to their names, smell to high heaven when squished.

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  67. Just another example of the unintended consequences of advanced technology. Now, if you had manually pulled the shade you would have seen the offending character and promptly removed him before the impending squish therefore negating the need to consult the holy grail, i.e. Google for assistance – gotta take the bad with the good, I guess.

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    • Suzanne, you’re right. No doubt about it. Not to mention that if I were to have manually opened the shades I’d have waited until after I had my coffee and the stink bug might have moved on. But NO I had to use the easy remote control to raise the swanky shades. Lesson learned.

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    • Marty, I’m a frugal woman and I instantly realized that if I didn’t get the bug guts off the shade, then we’d have to buy a new shade and those things aren’t cheap! Thus I sprung into action, like a nut job, racing around the kitchen. I’m sure you understand.

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  69. Oh poop! Is that the right exclamation to use with a stink bug? Dang it – but wow, you are good at writing suspense, dear Ally! I’m sorry that you were distracted from your cup of coffee, disturbed by the intruder, and delayed in stopped the action from happening. But I’m delighted to see you again. Happy new year!

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  72. Ally,
    1) Welcome back!
    2) Happy 2024!
    3) Rest in peace and/or pieces, stink bug!
    4) I was reading this and seeing it happen in my head in slo-mo like it was a paper towel commercial, which made me laugh! Hopefully, this is the worst you have to endure for the rest of the year.
    Mona 🙃

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    • Mona, I’m happy to be back, but glad I took some time away from writing. Happy New Year to you, too. I like thinking this is like a paper towel commercial, I know exactly what you mean. I’m not a fan of stink bugs, but not to the degree that I want to see one murdered by a roller shade. 😳

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  74. Oh goodness, the downside of living on the edge of the forest primeval! Though I do love your yard and view, it is disheartening to wake up in such a way. Sigh. Welcome back!

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    • J, I’m happy to be back but not thrilled that I had to deal with bug guts. I like our backyard too, but will be more diligent about really looking at the shades before I hit the UP button.

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  75. There you were, just wanting an innocent cup of coffee… and then everything went to hell. That happens to me sometimes. I guess it keeps us on our toes? I’m not sure I’ve ever seen (or smelled) a stink bug. Pictures next time, please. 🙂

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    • The Travel Architect, it’s funny but I thought that stink bugs were everywhere in the world, like flies and mosquitos and spiders. However a few other commenters have mentioned they don’t know what a stink bug is or looks like. Here is a photo from the Washington Post:
      stink bug

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  76. That the stinkbug would sacrifice himself so that you could return to blogging–what a trooper. We have the occasional stinkbug appear inside our house, and we affectionately call him (her?) ‘Stinky’. I guess we pretend that the same bug is visiting, but I don’t think they live for 10+ years, do they?

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    • Gwen, you have a wonderful way of explaining what happened to the recently deceased stink bug. Yes, he [she?] gave his all so I’d have something to write about here. I don’t know how long they live but I doubt it’s 10 years. They all look alike to me, so I suppose you could have the same one wandering around your house.

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  77. That is both gross and annoying. I hope you are not able to see even the slightest hint of the stain, every time you look at that blind. I’m glad you found a solution. I’ve had really good luck with just plain old foaming hand soap for most stains.

    A household hint that’s worked for me: All of our stink bugs seem to congregate in the family room around the two windows. I regularly put sprigs of fresh rosemary in the window sills and I’ve only seen one stink bug since I started this routine about two years ago. Also, I’m one of those people who cannot detect the scent of a stink bug, so I’m lucky that way.

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    • Bijoux, rosemary keep stink bugs at bay? I can do that. I didn’t think of foaming hand soap but it makes sense. The whole thing unfolded in slow motion and was weird. Stupid bugs.

      You don’t smell stink bug stink? You are an amazing person. Lucky you.

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  80. Welcome back! These emotions of which you describe happened to me last winter when I suddenly realized I’d hit a patch of black ice going 65 mph. It could have been much much MUCH worse. one second I was heading into the median strip thinking we might have a head on, the next I’m going side ways trying to correct, thinking, I know there is a semi not too far behind us…..then…hang on/ we hit the ditch going side ways… didn’t roll, didn’t get hit, didn’t hit anyone..worst that happened was my son started having a panic attack. Life is good.

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    • Oh man, DM, that’s awful and way more scary/weird than what happened to me and the stink bug. I’m glad you were okay, but not that this happened to you. I take it your son calmed down and that you were safe. But really? Did that need to happen?

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      • he didn’t tell me until several days later about the panic attack. He knows his body so well. And yea, black ice was not on anybodies radar (including the weather forecast) so it was a “fun” way to start out the morning. We were just heading to the jobsite

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  81. I’ve had this happen, but luckily it was only a spider, who did not have a scent. YIKES. And all before your first cup of Joe. That is a sad way to start your day.

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  82. Welcome back, Ally! Bummer about the stink bug, they stink in more ways than one. And seem to revive and appear out of nowhere with the slightest warming up of the season. I’m smiling thinking about the blinds going up and down in unison. 😆🤔 Happy New Year to you and your hubby, I hope 2024 is splendid and free of future stink bug invasions. You’ve paid your dues for 2024.

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    • Shelley, I like your thinking about how I’ve had my annual stink bug encounter and now am free to go through the rest of the year not dealing with one again. Or at least not dealing with the aftermath of one being murdered in the roller shades. Happy New Year to you, too.

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  83. So glad you are back, Ally!
    And good-bye, stink bug! I tell any and all bugs and bats that make the mistake of entering my apartment (yes, we have bats in my area), “If you come in here, you’re dead. I make no exceptions.” I’m grateful a bat that happened to wander in wandered out the same way it got in!

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  84. Not the best way to start the morning, Ally. But, hey, it gave you some blog content. 😁 Welcome back! I had a weird perception experience the other day. I was backing slowly out of a parking space when my car began beeping, indicating something might be in my way, so I stepped on the brake. What I didn’t realize was that the car next to me was moving forward. The optical illusion caused my brain to think I was still in backward motion, no matter how hard I pressed the brake pedal. It was a really strange feeling.

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    • Christie, your experience sounds scary. I can understand how it’d happen, makes sense, but still weird. It’s amazing how many different ways our brains interpret things. Strange, indeed.

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